Give a scenario/example on a method of alternative discipline (instead of spanking) that has worked for you!?

Question

For example:
State the senerio: My 8 year old didn't pick up her room, after I told her 3 times. So instead of spanking ,"I told her no tv for a week".
Then state if the punishment worked.

Answer 1

We have a "stoplight system" where each kid starts the day on green. Each offense moves them to yellow and then red. If they are on red they don't get dessert.

We have a consequence called "service" that is used if a child hurts someone else or damages someone else's property. Basically, since you didn't respect the other person or their property, then you are put into service for them for the rest of the day. If you hurt them, you help heal them. If we are going out, you bring them their shoes and coat. If it's time for bed, you get them their PJ's and help find their stuffed animals. You may be asked to pick up after the person you wronged or to do their share of chores. My kids HATE being put "in service" and will usually do anything to avoid it.

For my son, taking away Gameboy, computer and TV work pretty well. The girls don't have Gameboys but have lost the TV and computer privledges before.

Using either natural or logical consequences, depending on the situation.

If you break a toy of your own, it may not get replaced or fixed. If you break someone of someone else's, besides service you may have to pay to buy a new one or fix it for them. If you don't get off the computer or turn off the TV when you are told, you may lose that privledge for the next day. If you don't behave out in public, we might go home early or you might not get to go the next time.

Answer 2

With my 2 boys we use positive disipline. They each have a jar and when they do something without being told or I ask them just once and they do it they get a penny (they are 4 and 3 and LOVE having money lol) when they dont listen or use potty talk etc they lose a penny. At first it was tough as they HATE to lose money but once it clicked it took off! At the end of the month we go to a local dollar store and let them pick out whatever they want (within thier budget) as a reward for a good month.

Answer 3

Punishment should have something to do with the crime. I have a 9 yr old and a 11 yr old, both boys, when I tell them to clean thier room, they are in it until its done, if they take to long, I make sure they miss out on something, without them realizing what IM doing. Such as I have my mom call, which both boys love going with her and ask for them to come over the one with a dirty room doesnt get to go. when they whine some I just say well if your room was done you could have went, that was your choice. it didnt take many times of that, and they started listening.

Answer 4

I agree with the Supernanny methods. Or get some leverage. Take whatever she didn't pick up, pack it up and let her know she can have her stuff back when she is able to take care of it. I have an 8yr old boy. I find the threat of taking somethign away gets him VERY motivated. But I also learned to follow through or they won't take you seriously. If figure it can only help them in the long run. How else will they learn to be responsible?

Answer 5

I give my girls a reasonable time limit to pick up their rooms. If at the end of the time it's not done, whatever is left goes in the garbage. That works for us and I've only had to throw away items one time. I also use hot sauce for a sassy mouth, lying or cussing. That has also worked wonders without "hurting" them. One more thing that works for my youngest, I have one corner in the living room which has spiderwebs, I don't clean them so there nice and thick, if she is being naughty then that's the corner we do timeout in...... usually one warning is all she ever needs. So there you go. I hope at least one of my tricks works for you.

Answer 6

This method works really well for me. When my son is misbehaving or not listening to what I tell him, I make him stand against a wall with his nose touching and have him put his arms up above his head. This doesnt hurt but lets him know that I am serious. The time he stands there is based on his discretions...ex. hitting his sister:5 min...and an apology and kiss.

Answer 7

the situation approximately spanking, is that it could't be executed throughout the youngster's life, such as you suggested. As a new child gets older, they'd't be observed around and spanked. instructors will anticipate your new child to act without corporal punishment. via commencing now, your toddlers could have nonphysical ideas to coping with issues. I even have older toddlers, and as they advance, punishments ought to advance and alter with them. that's what I propose: before everything have sparkling cut back obstacles and consequences. Your new child ought to be responsive to the regulations, and that they ought to be the comparable at homestead and on the keep. whilst they misbehave, confirm you're calm adequate to tutor them which you're optimistic, in value and that its completely ordinary that they ought to behave. in the event that they hit, you end them, eliminate them from the placement, and that they ought to lose play time. As they advance, and at 5 years previous, you could surely eliminate a privilege from them. This ought to ensue at modern-day, and not hours later. while you're on the keep, end the youngster, carry their hand and if decide for be, go away the keep. tell the youngster "you be responsive to you need to have not executed that, and now you don't get t.v. for the afternoon, etc". some cases of dropping privileges, and this suggests in basic terms asserting what you're prepared to eliminate, and your toddlers will start to confirm what authentic international consequences are like. If spanking or hitting is the discipline you specially use, they'd have a troublesome time coping with issues with out it. i wish this facilitates, and you and your husband can decide for what the regulations are, and the concrete consequences.

Answer 8

I haven't had to really discipline my daughter (8 months) with anything other than a stern, "NO!" I would suggest watching some SuperNanny or Nanny 911. They have some GREAT discipline ideas on there.

Answer 9

My son 6 he has to clean his room and can not do anything else until he is done, that means if dinner is being served and hes not done cleaninghis room, and he chooses to miss dinner due to not cleaning his room then he misses dinner. Make sure you give her enough time to do it. My son wants clean clothes we make him put his clothes in the laundry room. after to months of him hating it, he now does it with not problems, and we dont even have to ask him to do it. we don't punish him by taking food away, but if he rather sit in his room crying about having to do something i asked him to do instead of eating, then that is his choice. It is all about natural consquences

Answer 10

You stand over her and direct her step by step what needs to be done. When she says, "You don't need to tell me!" you say, "Well, obviously I do, you can't seem to do it on your own when you're asked nicely." And then proceed to stand there till she gets it done. It's time consuming, but it DOES work.

Yes, punitive damages (payment for offenses) does work. The best one is she can't watch TV or go outside or eat dinner until the task is completed. She'll eventually get hungry or want to see her favorite program, and will give in.