I am a 30 year old woman. I recently met an 18 year old male. Should I date him?

Question

I am 30 and I met an 18 year old male recently. I feel really guilty about dating him. He is so sweet, and caring. He has a job, and his own place. He is ready for a relationship with me, but I hesitate because of the age gap. I admire the fact that he is taking a shot at an older woman. My friends all say, no, don't talk to him, but there is nothing wrong with him in my eyes (they hesitate because of the age thing). They all say that it is a phase he is going through, and he will not be attracted to me in 3 years or so. What should I do?

Answer 1

Well i know what you are going through because i am 30 years old and i am talking to an 18 year old and people say it wont work but the thing is you have to do what is best for you and not for what people tell you. Because in the long run you will have to live with person if you choose to be with him.God tells us they are someone out there for everyone he just might be the one just give it a chance you never know till you try . Life is short just be happy and if this guy makes you happy dont worry about what people think just live life and appericiate it.

Answer 2

A very good but tricky question.

This depends a large part on the maturity of your guy
and also your own involvement with the relationship.

I personally once believed that age alone was a factor
in a question of this type due to the fact that my own
wife is 13 years my junior. However if you truly feel
that your guy is ready and willing to be involved in a
relationship with you, then try it. But go slowly.

Men are on average the less mature then women of
the same age. with him being only 18, he may or
may not be younger still when compared to his level
of mental maturity.

Take a look at your own involvement. Do you feel
that you might be in this relationship based on the
fact that since he is so young, it is compliment on
the way you look physically? If this is the sole
reason, then the foundation on which the whole
relationship could be flawed.

but if you both truly care for one another, then give
it a try. Just keep in mind that your guy might not
see every situation the same way you do and as a
result, there could be a classic case of 'age gap'
in play.

Happiness is not about age, but you owe it to your
guy to look not only to your own interests but his
if you really care for him.

Answer 3

I'm 40 years old, and is married to a fantastic Navajo Indian lady 9 years MY senior! We've been married for over 9 years now, and still get along great. No complaints in the bedroom either! BTW, my grandparents has 19 1/2 years difference between them. Grandpa was older, and married a spring chicken. They had 7 kids, one of whom was my mother. They were married for 31 years before grandpa passed on at 72 years. Age is just a number. I would look at the guy/gal's emotional, and maturity levels than physical.

Answer 4

it's true, it's a phase. My sister dated a guy 10 years her junior and what a disaster. He wound up stealing a lot of money from her and caused nothing but grief. Much of the time she felt like she had to mommy him. When he turned 24 he dumped her after all her loyalty for an 18 year old girl. Now my sister is 37 feeling depressed and abandonedand feels too old to be sexy. Trust me. Men are immature enough when they are just a few years older. Maybe you should stop thinking your 18 and start going for men who know how to be men and treat a woman.

Answer 5

good question.
I don't know the guy so I can't really say for sure, but I'll adress two possible things. 1. A lot of times guys can see older women (if you're on the pretty side) sort of a badge of honor (I know its sick but its the way our minds work). or 2. he's genuinely interested in you though temporarily, so his interest with you will fade as soon as this phase is over. So if you can deal with about a two year fling, go for it, but if not, just don't do it because its not going to last forever.
hope that helped : )

Answer 6

Whatever is real--if you both feel affection for each other, why not go for it? Its legal, you are both of age. With a 12 year age difference some problems might come up, but you can deal with them and if it works out, great, and if it doesn't, you end it. Not much to lose by giving it a try, but you might be missing out on that single special relationship if you pass on it. And don't forget, if you add 20 years to both your ages, the 12 year difference is pretty much insignifigant.

Answer 7

Been there, done that. It will be a short lived relationship, but as long as you can get the things you need ot of it, then all is well. He still has a lot of hidden immaturity issues that he is going to be dealing with over the next 6 years. As long as you understand that things may get weird, and don't fall too hard for him. I say go for it.

Answer 8

as a 19 year old I'll say that guys in my age group do have the "older woman" fantasy

might be a phase but who knows.

Answer 9

well the way i see it. NO, only because he doesnt know what he wants with his life the way you do. you have your independance and your way of life in such a way that he does not yet because he is so young and just starting out. I honestly say go for it, but if it doesn't work out you now know why. Take care.

Answer 10

I think you are too old, that's borderline pedophilia ..eeewwww gross...he's just turned an adult!! Find someone closer to your age...he will only end up resenting you later for taking away his younger years...and your friends are right..after he's had you, he will trade you in on a younger version...you're setting yourself up for heartache..remember...generally guys mature WAY slower than women! Good luck!!