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I would like to take the hostess a gift - would like your thoughts on what is appropriate, please?

The dinner party is being given by an ex-colleague of mine and her husband. She has invited my boyfriend (they work together) and suggested he might like to bring me, but hasn't contacted me direct, and I think I might have offended her slightly. I would like to make amends.

The dinner party is quite important for my boyfriend as his boss will be there, the hostess is a well educated middle class English lady aged 50.

Should he take wine and would it be appropriate for me to take a gift such as flowers?

I'mm also feeling anxious about what to wear...any helpful suggestions please?!

2006-08-01 04:15:14 · 18 answers · asked by Suzita 6 in Society & Culture Etiquette

18 answers

Hi, as to gifts - wine is not always a good idea unless you pick a bespoke bottle. Me and my wife tend to go for a nice wrapped box of Belgium chocolates, if she opens them you may have them passed round with coffee, therefore make sure there are enough for everyone present. As to what to wear, it depends on the invite, if your borfriend is wearing a tie - then a dress is appropriate. Enjoy and relax, they have invited you.

2006-08-01 04:31:50 · answer #1 · answered by andrew S 1 · 1 1

Unless this has been specifically requested I'd say not. If you hate the idea of turning up empty handed then take wine - a nice safe and reasonably expensive one like Chateuneuf du pape, or brandy such as courvoisier for your hosts own, private consumption. Do not expect to either see it again or for it to be drunk with the meal, the hostess will have already taken care of complimentary beverages when she planned her menu. to suggest otherwise, or that you know better, is an insult.
If you would like to take flowers make sure that they are already arranged as the hostess will have enough on her plate without the extra work. It is probably better to wait until after the event and send them as a thank you.
Thortons chocolates are usually welcome as long as she's not diabetic or anything, but again intend them for private consumption - what she actually does with them is up to her...
Wear something elgant and plain with understated jewellry and make-up - it is not your place to outshine the hostess
Be pleasant, look interested at all times , watch, listen and learn , do not boast, above everything do not even think about getting drunk and...Enjoy!!!!!

2006-08-01 06:22:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If you bring a bottle of wine - this should be enough - for you as a couple. A gift for the hostess is allways nice and it can be done very creative if you'd like to make an impression. A glass of some delicacy, such as a truffe can be as nice or a handembroidered lavender-sac.

Dont overdo it though. She can find it kind of embarrassing

2006-08-01 05:47:30 · answer #3 · answered by Tones 5 · 0 0

Basically you should not take anything as your the guest of a guest, do not take wine she might be insulted that you think her not bright enough to select wine for her own dinner party, I would wear a plain simple black dress, not too short and not too low, don't overdo the make up or jewellery either and wear your hair simple but stylish and if she looks down her nose at you after all that then just smile and worry not, be yourself and never make excuses for who you are, if you wish to buy her flowers or a plant then I suggest you do that the day after as a thank you for a lovely evening.

2006-08-01 13:24:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Wine is always a nice gift. I like the idea of potted flowers, myself - that's what I took when I went to meet my boyfriend's mother.

I wouldn't sweat it that she didn't contact you directly. If she works with your bf, asking him to bring you as a date is fine.

Dress in something you feel comfortable in - always the most important!! Casually elegant, I'd say. Nothing too loud. Maybe a casual dress, or some nice slacks and a blouse. Dress it up slightly with some tasteful accessories, but don't go overboard.

2006-08-01 04:26:22 · answer #5 · answered by locolady98 4 · 0 0

Good wine - worth doing your research. Something less well known then Stowells or Hardys would be preferable!
I'm not sure about flowers, I personally would think thats a bit OTT, considering I dont think you need to make amends for anything! A nice posh box of chocs (again nothing too obvious) could go down well if you really want to take something else.

2006-08-02 04:40:21 · answer #6 · answered by Lola 2 · 0 0

A bottle of wine and some flowers are the norm. So you won't go wrong there. Wear a simple dress, nothing over the top and nothing too fussy. Don't wear anything that is too revealing.

Be relaxed and remember they are human beings too and they all brush their teeth, pass wind, go to the toilet and sometimes can't find what to wear.

Enjoy your evening.

2006-08-01 04:48:56 · answer #7 · answered by Curious39 6 · 0 0

Speaking from my personal experience, the wine sounds like a good idea, but not sure about the flowers ~ I personally have allergies and would be sneezing my head off thru the whole dinner if someone brought me flowers.

2006-08-01 04:32:31 · answer #8 · answered by return1969 4 · 0 0

I dont think you can really go wrong with a nice bouquet of flowers. As for what to wear, nothing too short or very low cut, she doesnt sound like the sort of woman who would appreciate it. Either a nice pair of trousers and a smart top or a dress cut slightly under the knee. perhaps a nice wrap dress or something worn with heels.

2006-08-01 04:23:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

definitely everyone brings a wrapped present (verify forward in case you want them to hold gag presents or presents of a definite value) and that they might desire to no longer placed a tag on the present. All presents pass into one huge section interior the cener of the room, at an identical time as you have chairs for each guy or woman to take a seat down in a circle around the presents. placed slips of paper in a basket numbered from a million to 20 (or although many travelers are partaking). pass the basket and enable definitely everyone %. a sort. the guy in value calls out #a million. Whoever has form a million can %. any present from the pile. next, #2 is talked approximately as. That guy or woman can choose for to the two %. a modern-day from the pile or take yet somebody else's present from them (if so, the guy who had their present taken from them can %. a alternative present from the pile). This keeps till all numbers have been talked approximately as and all contributors have a modern-day. at that element, definitely everyone would open their presents!

2016-10-01 08:30:53 · answer #10 · answered by goldthorpe 4 · 0 0

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