Hes my age. She met him + she thinks hes just my friend. He gave me my first kiss ever. He knows that she doesnt know + I dont want her 2 find out from him. She thinks hes a nice boy. We hang out outside of school w/ groups our friends, both boys + girls. I would rather have me tell her than find out on her own, but Im afraid that shell tell me I cant see him anymore. Ive never told my mom about any crush, boyfriend, etc. I have twin 8-year-old sisters, and those r the only siblings I have. If I had an older sister, it would b easier 2 tell her. Also, my mom filed for a divorce about a month ago + its still in the process of being finalized. I think she would b afraid of me being abused, like she was, or getting pregnant. I know he loves me + would never hurt me, + he respects me enough to understand that I love him but Im not ready 2 have sex. My mom has a tendency 2 b overprotective, and I think if she knew she would just worry about me + say that Im 2 young.
2006-08-01 03:57:09 · 51 answers · asked by Angie B. 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If your mom knows him and likes him you are halfway there. Tell her that you really like him and that you would like to go out with him sometimes or that you would like him to come around to your house sometimes. Dont suggest going to his house. Stick to 'really like' and don't mention 'love'.
2006-08-01 04:05:52 · answer #1 · answered by David74 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What are you doing? At thirteen you shouldn't be considering sex as an option. A sexually intimate relationship is a powerful stressor on the human mentality when a person is not ready for it. Not to mention all the risks like Sexually Transmitted Infections or pregnancy. I definatley do not support the abstinence only nonsense but I'm telling you now that at thirteen you are not emotionally developed to deal with a sexual relationship.
So to answer your question, I would say you should get out of this boyfriend - girlfriend relationship and diversify a little bit. Hang out with many, many different people. No relationship, no problem. If you are doing something that you think your parents wouldn't approve of you probably shouldn't be doing it. Your'e parents are going through a tough time right now and I don't have enough information to give you some advice on how to handle that. Just deal with your own life, go to school, do extra-curricular activities, concentrate on going to college (seriously make college a priority). Protect your personal growth and development and good luck.
2006-08-01 04:16:11 · answer #2 · answered by Rare Hero 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speak to her. Eeeeaaase her into it.
Step 1 - Friends date: Include 2 or 3 other friends as well as your BF and ask her or let her know that you want to go to a movie together with all these friends. Do this a few times - movies, McDonalds, etc.. Even ask her to drive you there and pick you up.
Step 2 - Dinner at home: Tell her you and him have been getting along really well together and could you invite him over for dinner.
Step 3 - The Date for 2: After a few friends dates and dinner at home, you can ask to go for the date alone with him - by that time she'll be used to him and it shouldn't be too much of an issue. Again, you can ask her to take you there and pick you up so she knows where you are.
Step 4: The big announcment: By this time, she should suspect VERY strongly that you guys are getting serious about each other and you probably won't even have to tell her.
REMEMBER: SHE WAS A TEENAGER ONCE TOO! BE HONEST AND IT WILL PAY OFF! DON'T DO THINGS BEHIND HER BACK AND DON'T SNEAK OFF - IF ANYTHING IT WILL MAKE HER LOSE CONFIDENCE IN YOU AND DEFINITELY IN HIM.
Good luck!
Toodles.
2006-08-01 04:13:49 · answer #3 · answered by MarQus1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi! I am a father of two girls 16 and 17 and I can understand all that you are going through and the fears you have. I try to keep the lines of communication open about everything and would hope my daughters would be comfortable about discussing this with me.
I think if you tell her you have something important to talk with her about, and tell her everything you have posted here in your question, she will be thrilled to talk with you. Mom's love sharing in their daughters lives!
If your mom feels that this boy is nice, safe and she knows him, I doubt she will make you stop seeing him. I also doubt that her divorce will be a concern in her thoughts about your new friend. Just like ALL parents, our biggest concern is our children's safety, so let your mom know that you feel safe with him and enjoy being in his company. Trust me, she will understand...she was 13 once too, and probably had a crush on a boy at that age too!
And I'm happy that you are smart enough and have the courage to tell him that you are not ready for sex. Keep that thought for several more years too. You are a smart young lady. Good luck to you!
2006-08-01 04:17:29 · answer #4 · answered by BlueFire 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are a little to young to be in love but you do seem like a good girl so I think you should tell your mom and let her know you don't want to have sex, also you have your whole life ahead of you and he probably will not be your last boyfriend. Its just your first crush take it slow and don't forget about the other boy FRIENDS you have. Live your life and be honest with your Mother and lesson to what she has to say, talk to her, no yelling because that salves nothing, stay good and use your head and not your heart, and most of all don't let any one talk you into anything you know is wrong. Remember it is YOUR Mother and she only wants the best for you, trust her and be HONEST with her. Good luck
2006-08-01 04:19:24 · answer #5 · answered by Sheri 2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start off by asking her how old she was when she had her first boyfriend...Then, she will probably end up just asking you! She probably already suspects this boy might be more than just a friend. Trust me, moms are a lot more intuitive than you think. Also,every mother wants nothing more than for their children to feel like they can come to them for anything and talk about anything. Don't be secretive with your mother, or that will really worry her!! If you have an open and honest relationship, she will do a lot less worrying. Good luck and remember you are still a child. Don't take this boyfriend thing too seriously. Just have fun being a teenager and don't get yourself pregnant.
2006-08-01 04:07:53 · answer #6 · answered by Ruthie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm...My daughter is getting ready to turn 13 and she and I can talk about anything. She told me about a crush she had and I respected her for telling me about it. I thought it was cute but I also reminded her about the importance of being a lady and not rushing into things too fast. It sounds like your Mom has good intentions because no Mother wants her child to go through anything hurtful. Bottom line is you are rather young and a 13 year old boy (he can't help himself) doesn't have a clue on how to control those hormone urges. BTW oral sex IS sex!!! Get on the Internet, go to the library, and do whatever research you can to get a better understanding about your body, mind, and spirit. I will tell you what I tell my daughter all the time...Enjoy being a kid as long as you can. Take care!
2006-08-01 04:11:59 · answer #7 · answered by myjoy247 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Always be honest with your parents. Tell her, tell her everything. And live with the decision she makes. You are young but by todays ways you may be more mature than most. Most importantly do not take this relationship to a physical point. Give that time, and lots of it. You sound very smart, don't get caught up in what other girls tell you about having sex, just don't do it. If he loves you like u want he will wait . Just enjoy ur friendship for now. Enjoy being 13... Good luck Sweetheart...
2006-08-01 04:04:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think that you are to young also... i wouldn't want my little girl dating b/c now and days there are a lot more people having sex at such a young age and having kids i would be scared also. but on the advice; you do not want to start your teenage yrs off lying to your mom. you should already have the feeling that she does not want you to date until the right age. if you say your b/f respects you then you can wait three years, still hang out in the same group but without the pressure of the label of b/f g/f. if your mom trust you to have him over than you to can still be friends; you and your b/f should understand that at your age it is better to remain friends and enjoy your youth while it last(you can still do all the things you do together w/o the label) but if your in the relationship to just stay i have a b/f for people at school its not worth losing your mother or b/f...
let me know how it goes
2006-08-01 04:10:44 · answer #9 · answered by AC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hon u r too young to understand how much anyone loves u ... I was about 18 to 19 when i had a boyfriend.. a guy who i thought really loved me+ would never hurt me+respects me enough to understand that i love him,,, but he left me after 2 years....n i was really hurt. If u love him ,,, take it slow... Don't hang out too much... Sex is there when u love someone,, u never know when u can break....... As far as ur mom is concerned she will never understand... because we all have been there at ur age n know what mistakes we made after a year or 2 .... she will keep an eye on u and will always be scared for u that u might get pregnant anytime.... She will put many restrictions on u... Because adults know what mistakes they made u will make too n they don't want u to get hurt... but we will never understand y adults have to be so strict or not understanding.... If u love a boy... that is a thing to be respected but if u are not ready for sex .. that is not a gurantee... If u want to say protected ,,, not get pregnant before u graduate from college ,, then u should tell ur mom.. she can protect u ... But if u think u can handle urself n want no one to stop u then u should not tell ur mom..... dear the decission is urs ... oneone can make that for u... If u think ur mom will find out n get hurt .... then she will n u have younger sisters too .. u are an example for them ........... your mom might never approve this because u have younger sisters too who might think that having a boy friend is fine... Discuss with ur mom ,,, she might be able to help u before she try to yell at u.....
2006-08-01 04:00:28 · answer #10 · answered by Daffodil07 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I know just how you feel. This boy asked me out last year (7th grade) and I really liked him, so I said yes. I did tell my mom, but it took a lot of courage.
I'd just tell your mom, but make sure shes in a good mood. :-) A good time to tell her would be maybe when shes relaxing, watching tv. Sometime when shes calm. And your probably responsible enough to not get into any trouble with him. So your mom should trust you.
And you know how you said how if you had a big sister it would be easier. I totally agree with you. I only have an older brother... which doesn't help much.
2006-08-01 04:06:16 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋