Advice on destination weddings? Are they difficult to plan? We live in WA and we're having it in CA.?

Question

We are both from San Diego but we now live in Washington. We've decided to get married in San Diego because that's where my fiance family is. My family is military and move a lot. However, my distant family lives up in the Northwest. I'm relying a lot on HIS mom to help out, which scares me. I"m just worry. I'm not sure I'm going to get exactly what I want with it being so far away. I don't want to sound rude or un-greatful when I don't like something. Any suggestions would be helpful. Thanks!

Answer 1

I'm not sure how much you like your future mother-in-law and if you know her taste and If you do, you shoudn't be worry about it. If not... let's see. I'm not sure how much she's helping you but try to find some ideas online that you like and send her to those places to book them, order from etc. What I mean, search online for nice places for your ceremony, choose two or three that you like and ask her to go and see if they are OK.Maybe give her a To-Do-List and ask her to check if this place will be good to fit the amount of guests you have, if the place doesn't look to tacky or just bad. Maybe that place can also hold your reception.
You just need to "show" her that you're still in charge of the wedding and she only your "hands and eyes".
Find online good caterer and bakery for your cake.You can always ask on "Yahoo Answers" for help with good bakeries. People will help you. Then send your mother-in-law to check out that place and maybe ask her to do the tasting. I'm pretty sure that if she likes you and she is not mean to you she should be really helpful and she might even do a good job.She might even make interesting sugestions? You never know...
But remember, you do your "job" first and search online to make sure you're getting what you at least think you like.
How about your fiance's cousin-girls or friends? Do you know them? Have you ever meet them? Do you like them and do they like you? Maybe they could go around and suggest some places and bakeries and then you could tell yor mother-in-law to confirm if they are good and OK.


I'm really jealous you're getting married there. I love San Diego.
Good Luck

PS. If you need more support or just to talk, email me.

Answer 2

As an event planner and a recently married (7 months) guy, I can say that it ain't easy to plan any event from afar. And if you cede a lot of responsibility to your future mother-in-law, you're also going to have to cede a lot of authority to make decisions.

So, take a trip out there and look at venues and interview as many potential vendors as you can on that trip. You don't have to decide right there, but since it's YOUR wedding you need to be comfortable with the people who will help make it happen.

Try to keep the stuff your fiancé's mother has to do to functional rather than creative. Hopefully she'll be ok with, for instance, gathering brochures from venues so you can choose what to look at when you are in town. Or assembling lists of... photographers, bands, caterers, etc. Then you and your future husband should make the final choice. Because if she chooses something and you don't like it, that won't start things off well. And if she recommends something strongly (and you've put her in a position where you want those recommendations) and you don't take it, you risk offending.

Basically, get her help getting started, you take it the last mile. I think you'll avoid a lot of potential conflict that way. Good luck and congratulations!

By the way, I know a great company that produces photo montage videos. If you're doing one of those, check out:

http://www.bigmomentfilms.com

Answer 3

We live in Wa and just got married in San Fransisco on June 24th 2006. The best advice I have is make trips down there, don't agree to anything before you see it, and try to get a package deal if you can. We got married on a yacht in the bay, and they did almost everything for me, of course we paid for it all but they coordinated it all for us they did the food, DJ, and the Cake, and some decorations. It was great and made it a whole lot less to worry about. Email me if you need more advice Congratulations :)

Answer 4

Destination weddings are not difficult to plan once you have everthing set that you want to do. I live in NY and got married in Las Vegas (ceremony, reception, etc..). It took me 1 year to work through my plans (and give everyone enough time to look for deals and tickets), and took my time. But the 10 month mark, all my plans were set.

Keep a binder of all your ideas, receipts, books, info packets, etc.. that you ask for. Shop around for prices, and always ask for visual products and references. You are basing everything on what you can see. If you are able to, try to make a trip at some point to see the places, linens, etc.. yourself. I did that 5months before the wedding and everything worked out well.

Good luck!

Answer 5

Sea World, San Diego Zoo or Disneyland. All these places would be great for a wedding.

Answer 6

Just decide which details you don't care that much about and delegate those to FMIL so she feels she is helping and keep those details you DO care a lot about and arrange those yourself.