I just got a new job yesterday and just found out i'm pregnant today. My new dilemna, any advice?

Question

i just got a new job working for a very hard (though very generous with pay raises) boss yesterday and then found out i was pregnant today. Its a small office with just the doctor and 3 employees including myself so i know in the long run, he will not be able to have that position empty when it comes time for maternity leave and i am afraid once its known i am pregnant they will see me as "temporary" and invest less in me than they would if I wasn;t. He even told me in the interview ( before i found out) that he has lost a lot of girls to pregnancy. I feel really bad about the timing but one of the best things about this job is the advancedment oppertunity ( my friend started less than a year ago at $5.50 and now makes $9.50 and he hates her cuz he says she is too "bubbly") I am just afraid that i will miss out on that now because he thinks he will lose me too (and honestly after the baby is born he might since we will have no sitter and don't trust/ know very well anyone in this town.

Let me add that i am thrilled to be pregnant, while my job does not offer a lot of money keep in mind i am a career women who loses my mind staying home with nothing to do, I live with my boyfriend and he is very supportive, we are in a great relationship and have been through everything together. Though we did not plan this we like to think of it as a suprise, and we are more than ready to care for a child, both financially and physically and emotionally. He alone makes a great amount of money, plenty for us, and i am working because i love to, i like the feeling of accomplishment and i like buying things and knowing i worked for that, but i don't need the job, i just want it VERY badly, i love it,and its only 3 days a week but 8-11 hors a day depending on if the patients walk in late with emergancies as the doctor will see walk-ins till 5:45, Plus in a small town where jobs are hard to find we like knowing that we have the 2 best jobs in town, I am a chiropractic assistant!!!

Answer 1

Don't listen to Scarlett Rose. She is a pro at killing and advising others to kill their babies. It is just a job. No job is worth the price of your family. Who knows, maybe your unborn child will become something big, perhaps president. Then you would not ever have to work. He/She would be so happy of the sacrifices you made for Him/Her.

Answer 2

My suggestion is to start the job and say nothing of your condition. Work your butt off (this will be hard because the beginning of pregnancy is plagued with overwhelming fatigue). Prove that you are a good employee. Try to show up early and always ask if there is anything else that should be done before you leave.

Then in a few weeks when people know you / like you... you should ask for a meeting with the doctor. Tell him that you are pregnant and that you are concerned about the way he might perceive you and tell him you just found out (I'd fudge the day I found out, maybe even the due date) Tell him the reasons that you like the job, and how you intend to continue to work there despite your pregnancy. Tell him what you are willing to do for the business. He will be thinking " maternity, days off, lightened work load, whining etc" these are common among pregnancy related concerns in workplace.

He may still have harsh feelings but if that is the case it is unrelated to you. It is related to the many girls he has lost to pregnancy before. If you do the above you are handling yourself respectfully and should not be the least ashamed. Also, if he still has a problem, you wouldn't want to work there, despite the pay.

Best of Luck

and
Congratulations.

Answer 3

first of all, don't feel bad that you are pregnant. even if you found out a week ago--you are entitled to hold a job just like anyone else. and he cannot discriminate against you. or fire you because you are pg. i would wait until you are in your 2nd trimester to tell him. unless morning sickness starts to get in the way. i wouldn't apologize for it. i would tell him you have every intention to do a good job and come back after the baby is born. if you don't....that's your decision. NEVER tell them you are not coming back until you are expected to come back from leave. i know that sounds mean---but you may change your mind. and it is just as if any other person quit and gave notice. why should you give a 9 month notice? also, most companies will not pay your maternity leave if you let them know you are not coming back. so a lot of women report back to work for the first day or week---then quit. i am a stay at home mom of 3 now, so i can relate to not leaving your baby with a stranger. but, my husband lost his job a few months before our first child was born. and i had to go back to work---she was born in november, and he didn't get a job until march. i had every intention of staying with my daughter, but my situation changed. if you need the job, and like it---you have time to figure out your situation. you have 9 months to prove you are a good employee. maybe he can even find some things for you to do at home or PT. now, while you are on maternity leave, he has to take you back. just know, it doesn't have to be the same job. if you decide to not return---just be honest...daycare didn't work out.

Answer 4

That happened to the lab tech I work with now. We started one day apart. Our clinic was new. She found out the day she started working (not hired) that she was pregnant. She had lost a few pregnancies before that, so she waited until after the first trimester to tell the docs. Everyone was really understanding, we had a temp come in until she was ready to come back. We all still work together. If you think you may want to be a stay at home mom, it would be best to inform your employer that you are pregnant and plan to work throughout your pregnancy but not after wards so they can start planning ahead. I hate it when prospective employers bring up pregnancy. It feels like a threat that if you get pregnant your job is a risk. They know full well that if they fired you for being pregnant, they would be paying you anyway.

Answer 5

By law, workplaces cannot discriminate against any physical or emotional problems....also, you are entitled to 6 weeks maternity leave without losing your job or being replaced. Check with your local FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act) or look up your states maternity leave law. This can give you peace of mind. Also tell your boss within the next couple of weeks. He will be less upset if you tell him earlier than waiting till its too late and he has invested in you thinking you will be a permanent fixture. Also explain to him that you expect to be back after your leave and will resume your duties. Whether you come back or not, this will make him feel better. Good luck.

Answer 6

Your boss can't fire you because your pregannt and your only obligated to tell your boss that your pregnant by the 15th week before the baby is due...so technically until your 25 weeks or 6 months you dont have to tell him...and he cant fire you because of that and he has to give you AT LEAST 6 weeks maternity leave but since he has less than 50 employess he doesn thave to pay you(thats he choice...yea sucks I know) but when you come back he has to put you in an the same or equal position making the SAME pay as before.....so honestly you can just tough it out until then and save money....make sure you tough it out though....even if you cant come back to work(which should be soley your choice) at least you'll have about 6 months savings...and if you think I'm lying go to the Department of Labor website....KNOW YOUR RIGHTS!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 7

My opinion on this is to not saying anything until your basically popping. If you go about your business and come to work whats he gunna do? Your preganant...and? If you cant do your job having a bigger belly then thats another thing...me im a receptionist, I wont say nothing when i become pregnant...the bigger i get...oh well. the time i say anything is "hey its obvious im about to pop...i need to go on maternity leave now!"....because my friend that worked as a receptionist at a car dealership said she was pregnant right when she found out...got fired because they didn't wana deal with it and then guess what? She had a miscarriage...wow that must have sucked....you get it though? There is no reason or need to tell them anything until the time you need to take time off.

Answer 8

I have the same problem! However i knew i was pregnant! I start this job making a lot more money than I ever had. I have been here for 2 months and Im 21 weeks pregnant (So im starting too show). I haven't told herthat im pregnant yet and neither should you. Wait untill they ask you... like when you start getting bigger! That way you keep your job! good Luck girl and congrats!

Answer 9

Stay on the job and work your butt off. When you are showing, then announce your pregnancy, and tell him whether or not you plan to stay after the baby is born. My dad's boss was hired when she was 6 months pregnant and is still there 10 years later.

Answer 10

I know it's gonna be kinda weird telling them and you are gonna feel like you are gonna lose your job but they can't fire you because you are pregnant. You should go ahead and tell them so they can prepare for you to get your benefits. Plus they might enjoy having a pregnant employee/co-worker.Oh and read about similar situations in pregnancy related books such a the overachievers guide to getting pregnant fast.

Answer 11

I would keep the job and if things get bad talk to him and let him know that what he is doing is illegal. Or you can work up untill you have your baby and find a different job for when you are done with maternity leave.