Any Single mother here. How do you handle your finance. My ****** BF left me stranded?

Answer 1

Get a lawyers advise. You can pin the bastard down.

Answer 2

Which is why you should be in a committed relationship before you have children, such as marriage.

But, since you didn't go that route, here is how to budget your money and become financially solvent.

Either on paper or on a spreadsheet program such as Excel, make a list of all your income:
Paycheck
Child Support

List your living expenses:
Rent/Mortgage Payment
Car Payment
Insurance
Utilities - water, electric, gas, phone, cell phone
Credit Card Payments
Loan Payments
Gas
Food
Medical expenses

Hopefully the income will be more than the expenses.

Be sure to set aside a place in your house for bills and once a week go through that pile so things will get paid ontime. If you get paid every two weeks, then make payday the bill paying day.

When you deposit your checks, immediately pay your bills, then take out in cash the amount budgeted for gas and food. Put that in envelopes to use for the month. If you spend with cash, you are less likely to overspend.

Set a base amount in your checking account that you will never go over - like $1,000 to start with.

If you have outstanding debt, payoff the smaller bills first - you will feel good when you get bills paid off and apply the amounts you paid to the small bills to the bigger bills and you'll be surprised how fast you can payoff your debt.

Next, open a savings account and put away enough money to cover all living expenses for 3 - 6 months.

Once you have that banked, open a Roth's IRA and start putting away the maximum every year.

If you find that you don't have enough money to pay your bills, then you will have to make some changes - big or little depending on how much you need to cut.

Some possible areas to shave expenses:
Cut your TV to just basic channels or eliminate completely
Cancel internet service and use the library computers
Change your cell phone plan or ditch the cell phone
Move to an apartment that covers utilities
Sell your car and take public transportation - you will save a TON of money with no car payment, no gas and no insurance. You can always rent a car for travel.

I know some of those are drastic changes, but giving up some luxuries can make a huge difference and eventually you can get those back once you've got your budget under control.

Answer 3

I know it's really tough on you right now. My daughter was in love with this guy that even I thought was a super nice guy, but soon after she got pregnant, he quit his job, and started doing pot every night, therefore could never pass a p test to get another job. Needless to say, that broke up quick. I helped her as much as I could for 3 years, and she worked two jobs, depending on babysitters and relatives to babysit. If you live near your relatives, don't be shy about asking for help, that's what relatives are for, among other things of course. The state picked up the cost of daycare once the baby was 2 y/o, and the state covered the medical. I paid her car pmt and insurance, so the money she earned was enough to cover her rent and utilities, and all the daily things you need for a baby. She recently married a guy that is taking care of everything now, so she's lucky. I hope things turn out as well for you. Good luck to you, and the baby.
Oh, she took him to court and got awarded 280 a month child support, but so far hasn't recieved any, because he doesn't work. He's dealing now, I'm sure, to survive.

Answer 4

From one Professor to another, I hope you have learned your lesson here. I am not condoning your boyfriend's actions, but you need to be more responsible. Your child is your #1 priority and finances should be coming from you. Do not rely on loser boyfriends to save you.

Ask your family for help. I'm sure they will not turn you down. And is your bf the father of your child? You cannot get child support unless there's proof he's the father. Was there some kind of paternity test?

I hope you will figure things out. Take care.

Answer 5

Get on the pill and go spread your legs for another guy. Or if you want to be like most single mothers work your *** off as a waitress or exotic dancer. Both of those pay the bills quite nice. While you are doing those two jobs put yourself through nursing school that will be a fine career for you.

Answer 6

many good answers but the best thing anyone can tell you is get a lawyer (free from child support agency/local welfare department) and get child support if you can. then learn how to fill out all the paperwork that comes with gov. help they can help you with housing,food, day care, medical even transportation just keep asking questions and someone will direct you in the right way. in the mean time you have to learn how to a single parent. and let the courts handle the bum!

Answer 7

i'm not a single mother, but i have made it on my own for several years before my son was born. go down to your local dfs outlet. division of family services. talk to them. also, talk to dcse and see what they can do. division of child support enforcement (use this option if he refuses to pay. if you can set up a financial arrangement with him, and he does pay, it's much better for the kid.) next, check out a temporary living arrangement..with folks or relatives. try not to use friends, their lifestyles may not be suitable for kids.
if you don't already have a job, start looking. dfs can help with daycare.
try searching out federally funded apartments, and visit h.u.d. they may agree to make part of your rent payment for you.

visit catholic charities and the food pantry. don't forget wic. there's a chapter in almost every town. they will pay for milk, peanut butter, cereal, baby food and formula.

in the end, you have to assume that your it. don't alienate the b.f just because of the decision he made. you must remain civil for the child.

call all the utility companies. pay them each 10 dollars now if you can, they won't turn you off if your paying. tell them your situation.

be strong. be smart. be a survivor. don't be bitter, even tho you are hurting. you are responsible for another life, so make sure it's your motive in everything...even if you date.

good luck

Answer 8

Get an attorney, and a good one. Find the best attorney in your city and start a case against him, if he isn't paying child support, attemting to leave town, missing several payments, etc. Sue Him, get him back like his asshole self got you. All parents have to be responsible for their young, and you have the very right to go against him in court/out of court/alternative against him.

Hey, screw the rest of these wankers, you have every single right as a mother to go against him, it's his fault, not your's, when he agreed with you on having a baby, only to backstab you like this, I think not.

All i've have to completely say is, continue life, forget this guy, and just care for your child, don't let these things weigh you down, fight back!

Answer 9

Um, you won't like my answer but it is if you had the ability to get knocked up and bear a child you should have figured out how you were going to take care of it BEFORE your bf left you. You bring life into the world, YOU are responsible. Suck it up and deal instead of trying to get someone else, father or not, to take care of your problems. Better yet. Don't create them in the first place.

Answer 10

I have to agree with Chimichanga on this one. It takes two, and unfortunately the child ends up suffering for it. Next time be smarter and wait, don't have sex with the man until after ya'll say I do...might just weed out alot of the loser men out there who will just make you a "baby momma". There's nothing special about that! Right now focus on getting a job and that baby that you made, get child support and keep your panties on. Live and learn...and don't make your child pay for your mistakes.

Answer 11

Funny...you yell at your staring boyfriend for leaving you stranded. Single mothers alway preach this responsibility. Where was your responsobility when you had unprotected sex? You want the man to be responsibile nine months later...why were you responsible nine months earlier.