Im so confused to what I should do about my relationship with my boyfriend. I'm 19, i'll be 20 next month. I'm a Junior at my university going for a masters degree. My boyfriend is 24 and he is in his last year of medical school for Neurosurgery. Then he will be doing his residency. My boyfriend wants a serious and long relationship, but since I'm only 19 i havent really thought about it. Also I know once I go back to school in a couple weeks i wont be able to see him much. And once he starts his residency, the hospital basically owns him for the next couple years. I dont know if I should continue my relationship or just stop it now before anybody gets hurt more. Please help me!!!
2006-07-31 16:39:37 · 21 answers · asked by qtgirliexox008 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
youre only 19, and having a relationship with a 24 year old will be tough if you keep it up. i would break it off. you have plenty of time to settle down, not now.
2006-07-31 16:43:23 · answer #1 · answered by eheusinger 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its good that your looking at the long term aspects of your boyfriends career. Your right about the residency requirements.
Your never going to see him much for the next year or so...and even when you do...he is going to be to exhausted to do much other then sleep.
I will tell you this....because it happened to me.....residents have a bad habit of hooking up with the nurses that they work with. They are there during the same shifts.....they have the patients in common...and they spend so much time together...its a natural progression to go from friends to lovers. Its not going to be much better after he finishes his residency either.
You didnt mention what your masters is going to be in...but...if its not in the medical field....your going to see just how little you have in common.
I would end it now.....enjoy the next two years of college life...and if you two still think there is something there in a few years...you can always get back together.
2006-07-31 16:49:37 · answer #2 · answered by werk2much2000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is so hard to know what the right thing to do is at 19. I know that I personally have changed so much from 19 to 24. I guess the best thing to do if you are not sure is to tell him that you are not sure and let him go. If it is meant to be then it will be, maybe not right now but who knows maybe even a ear from now you two will realize you need each other.
2006-07-31 16:48:42 · answer #3 · answered by Sarah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think , in your heart of heart, you have suspicion that he may find someone else during his residency and also that you will not be a match when he becomes a Neuro surgeon????? 19 is not a too young age to decide.
Have close discussion, I think he has no idea to leave you and you also decide to continue if you accept each other mentally than physically!!!
2006-07-31 16:49:06 · answer #4 · answered by THE WORRIER 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is possible to maintain a relationship through medical
school and residency - but it takes total commitment on
the parts of both people.
If you are thinking about other people, bail now!
You will both have plenty of chances to meet interesting
people later on - and hey, maybe you can take up again in
a few years.
The stastistics on relationships failing during residency and
medical school are apalling!
2006-07-31 16:46:43 · answer #5 · answered by Elana 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love each other, it will work. You can stay devoted to each other. If there are no problems in your relationship other than neither of you having any free time, your doing good! There is no need to end a relationship due to lack of time. Just be patient, and support each other. Now, if there are other problems, or a lot of fighting, maybe you should take a break.
2006-07-31 16:46:39 · answer #6 · answered by NotMySecret 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not going to tell you that you are too young. I am going to say,think about where you want to be 2 yrs from now when you have your degree and are going to find your place in this world.Be true to yourself first!! Never let yourself be defined by who you are with.And never ever let yourself be guided by others.
If you think it will be a problem,not being able to spend a quantity of quality time with him,then it probably will be.
2006-07-31 16:48:19 · answer #7 · answered by throatp0ker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him and want to be with him then stay with him. But if you aren't sure (which it sounds like you aren't too sure) take a break and date other people and see what and how you feel about it. If you can't stand to be with anyone else once you've dated then go back to Mr. Doctor. If you like dating and the way you feel then do that. In other words...girl, you need to explore your options.
2006-07-31 16:48:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think everything will be completley fine if u just give it some time.......u shouldnt try to back out of something that isnt completley predictable cuz if it ends of going through u will most likley feel lik ****, sweetie ur lucky to have such a guy that wants a long term relation ship and not just SEX SEX SEX!! so stay true to urself and try to maek the best of the situation, you know what will happen in ur heart, just trust urself u will know what to do.......... best of luck!!
2006-07-31 16:47:00 · answer #9 · answered by kewllikethat@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is how you know if it is love.if you can withstand the temtations of the world and get the next couple of years behind you then you will be stronger. both of you have to work at it.
dont give up on either of your paths though.finish your schooling and let him start his career.if both of you get that in order yall will be
in good shape if yall are smart.
thanx-a-million
nate
2006-07-31 16:54:36 · answer #10 · answered by supernate the star*catcher 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋