Well, I know all about breaking up, and it's hard for me to summerize everything up here, but I know I'm supposed to be distant and back off and see what happens, but how am I supposed to do that when I am still deeply in love with him and I can't get over him and I can't seem to get over him?
To top it off, he broke up with me when I was 7 months pregnant to take a break from us and he said we would talk about it after I give birth. He has gone out with one other girl since than, but they are not together, she left him.
Well, I see him all the time, he hangs with his friends, parties, and I'm the one stuck doing and paying for everything...when we decided to hang out.
I've been fighing for him for about 3 months now...and he still says we will talk after the baby comes but he's not promosing me anything...I'm about ready to give up but how do I let go when our child is here and we have to see each other all the time for the baby? I really want him back, and he treats me like his gir
2006-07-31 16:23:22 · 10 answers · asked by aztec_princess_87 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
We were together for 2 years and we had planned to get married...
I don't know what to do...I don't want to get over him, I had decided I wanted to be with him since the day we got back together last year and decided to have a child...
He broke up with me, because of trust issues, I guessI feared for his saftey and I snitched to his mom so that he wouldn't end up in jail or dead.
Another thing was, before we got back together, I had cheated on him because I was not sure if he loved me, and I was unhappy, and I ended up getting drunk and letting all my problems go one night and I broke up with him the next day...I would never do that ever again because when I confessed to him before we got back together, he was so hurt, and I would never do that to him ever again, I would never take the chance to lose him all over again...
He decided to break up with me for so many reasons, but I want to work on it so much...my dreams, everything, it's all I wanted...
2006-07-31 16:34:18 · update #1
We've been apart for 3 months...
And I am 36 Weeks & 4 days right now...
He's not a complete a**...i mean, he did say we could talk about it...and he has yet to go out with anyone else...
He is there for me, he's not like out running the streets...
And he's native american, he has a tribal check coming, so child support isn't the issue...he wants to be as involved with this child as possible...my question was, what can I do to get him back with me, or if he decides to not come back to me, how can I let go, and be distant and all that if he's always around for our baby?
2006-07-31 16:39:06 · update #2
The thing is, I feel like giving up so much, because everyone's advising me too...
And I sit there next to him and I cry and cry about it, I don't whine, I just end up tearing up all randomly and he sits there and hugs me and kisses me face and stuff and he knows I want to be with him so much...
But all he says is that we will talk about it after the baby is born...that it's not that far from now...and he says that if we are mean't to be, we will be together...and than he'll say he needs time to heal...
He promises to be there for his child, and his parents are very supportive of me, there's nothing everyone wants more than for us to be together!
We still hang out ALOT together, he said he wanted time to reget to know each other and remember what brought us together 2 years ago, and move on from there...
There was a point where it was all bitterness and hate, but we took a vacation together a month ago, and it's been happy between us since. I just wanna wipe the slate clean, start ove
2006-07-31 16:56:03 · update #3
I'm ready to grow up, I'm ready to settle down, so was he, he had proposed to me, but I gave the ring back because he started treating me sh**y again and I told him to keep it for until we were really ready and solved all these issues we had....and I tried...I spend months trying to talk to him, get him to spend time with me...and now when I tell him about it, he said, he started to let go of me the day I gave that ring back!
I never mean't it like that, I just wanted him to purpose to me when he was really ready and happy with me...I was ready!
Believe me!
And I'm ready now...alotta the things I did that he did not like I did out to spite him, to get his attention, a rise outta him...he said I was smothering him...
But these past 3 months, I've been working on myself, I gave up all those things because I was never like that to begin with, I did it out of the need to get his attention...
He sees that I am different...and I am ready to work on this...
2006-07-31 17:01:59 · update #4
IM SORRY TO SAY BUT YOU NEED TO THINK ABOUT YOUR
CHILD. AND THAT SHOULD BE YOUR ONLY CONCERN, THIS
YOUNG MAN NEED TO GROW UP, HE HAS A CHILD AND
HE NEED TO STEP UP. BUT YOU NEED TO MOVE ON,
AND LET GO, BECAUSE HE WILL ONLY HURT YOU AND
NOT BE THERE FOR THIS CHILD, AS FOR HIM BEING WITH
CHILD. BE HONEST YOU WOULD BE BETTER OFF WITH
OUT HIM IF HE GOING TO TREAT YOU AND THIS CHILD
LIKE T HIS.THE FIGHTING WILL NOT GET BETTER, HE
DOESNT WANT TO TRY AND MAKE THIS WORK, AND
FOR YOUR CHILD SAKE, LEAVE IT ALONG,
2006-07-31 16:32:13 · answer #1 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay, it sounds like he's dipping and dodging u and u see that cause if u didn't u wouldn't be writing it in ur question..
ur pregnant, what u should be doing is worrying about u and ur childs health.. how can u have a healthy baby if u become an unhealthy mother.. the last thing u need right now is stress.... this baby should be more important to u then chasing some guy that obviously doesn't want u anymore.. and yes that happens when u get knocked up because now they feel trapped... if he wanted to be w/u he would be w/u especially since ur carrying his seed..
and what's wrong w/seeing him everyday after the baby is born if that's his baby isn't that what u want?? u do want him to be a father to his child don't u?? Just cause ur not together that doesn't mean that he can't be a parent to his child and u shouldn't resent him either if he decides not to be w/u anymore at all... break ups happen, pregnancy is not a guarantee of keeping a guy, this is a lesson learned for u..
MOVE ON and worry about ur baby...
2006-07-31 16:32:47 · answer #2 · answered by Queen D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, the feelings you have for him are understandable. You are carrying his child for pete's sake. It also doesn't help that you are in your last trimester and your emotions are all over the place. You want the perfect family and he doesn't know what he wants. Be smarter than that. Don't let him play you like he is. You mentioned that he still treats you like his girlfriend, but you failed to say how often that was. With all his partying and seeing other girls, I can only imagine the time he treats you this way is when he doesn't have anything else going on. You and that baby deserve better than that. You are accepting your responsibility and he's running away from it. Is that what you want in the long run? A man who runs for the door everytime life throws him a curve ball? Or he feels like it's just too much for him to deal with. It may hurt something awful now, but it's for the best to let him go. Give him his space, live your life. If, and when he decides to grow up, realized he's made a huge mistake, maybe then, things will work themselves out. But for right now, let him go honey. If you don't you are only setting yourself up for more heartache.
2006-07-31 16:43:18 · answer #3 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say he isn't ready to settle down just yet, if he can't make up his mind before the baby is born than that should put red flags up instantly. Yes having a baby can be overwhelming especially when it's the first child. The question that comes to mind though, was this baby planned for? If you can't get him to make up his mind before the baby is born than as hard as it will be I would move on and get with someone that will be able to add support to you and the baby, sticking with someone that can't make up their minds will just lead you down the road of never ending heartache and you have a baby to think of as well, do you want to put the baby through this disaster waiting happen?
2006-07-31 16:32:46 · answer #4 · answered by Lady_Bluerose_2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all don't jump to the conclusion that you are going to break up. Wait till the baby comes out. Involve him in the process... he is the father after all. Tell him you want him to be there for the birth. You never know but with him in the delivery room and seeing his son/daughter born he may well want to stay together for the sake of the baby and then you can take it from there.
2006-07-31 16:30:26 · answer #5 · answered by Wibble 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to him. tell him exactly what you told us, if he feels the same for you and you guys are meant to be together then he'll help you work this out and he will treat you right. don't wait around for him. make sure he knows that hes going to have to complete a role in this kid's life, regardless of if you and him are together.
i wouldn't break up with him just yet, i dont think hes loyal or that great of a guy if he broke up with you while you wer 7 months pregnant. i'm sure you can find someone better who will care about you and your baby.
2006-07-31 16:30:06 · answer #6 · answered by sara901 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl dont worry urself bout him. ull find someone betta. or u can make him talk to u b4 he goes out the house. dont get ur stress up dont want nuthin wrong with the baby. tell him he needs to be a man and treat u properly. if he dont klean up, he aint the one 4 u. and what u could do is leave his stuff alone in the house and make him clean it up. ask him f he knows how u feel havin to do all of this while ur pregnant
2006-07-31 16:32:40 · answer #7 · answered by luvin_lyfe22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am in the same place as u but i hate my baby's daddy make an agreement that he is gonna get the baby like every saturday orevery other weekend all weekend and have him pay u something every week the same amount if u have any more ?s feel free to e-mail me i will try my best to anwser to the best of my ability ok i hope i helped aleast just a little like i said feel free to e-mail me i will anwser may not b right but i check my e-mail every night k later signed kitkat
2006-07-31 16:33:38 · answer #8 · answered by KitKat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just leave him,you'll get over it.And set up days for him to come and get the baby.See Problem solved.
2006-07-31 16:27:48 · answer #9 · answered by dccuttie75 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suggest you give Maury Povich a call.
2006-07-31 16:28:06 · answer #10 · answered by Booboo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋