I'm not jealous but.......guys and girls, I need your advice!?

Question

My boyfriend's boss is dating a girl that constantly hangs out at their job. When the boss is busy, she hangs around talking to my boyfriend and making flirty comments to him. He has told me about it, and I trust him since he isn't trying to hide anything from me. He says he is not attrated to her at all. However, the comments she makes to him lately are getting worse and really getting on my nerves. I'm not a jealous person but she has been telling my man that he's cute and the other day she asked him if she looked hot in a low cut shirt she was wearing! She knows I'm dating him and I told my boyfriend to tell her to leave him alone. He says he tries to, but he can't be rude since it's his boss's girlfriend. Should I confront this girl and tell her to leave my man alone? Or should I just not think anything of it?

Answer 1

First and foremost - I understand your position. It's not an easy one, because it's one of those situations where conflict will most likely be involved.

However, understand that every situation has a back door. It's not easy to find, but always taking the easy solution to problems won't always guarantee you the most enjoyable one.

Two things that are a must are understanding yourself and your boyfriend. The relationship is based on trust. It's the foundation, along with love. Without trust, you can expect the relationship to crumble like a shabby house.

You mentioned that your boyfriend tried to shun her away, and that he doesn't dare make too much of a move because it's his boss's girlfriend. Well, first of all, if it is the girlfriend of his boss, then most likely (and of course, that is if she IS trying to get into a relationship with your boyfriend) she is being unloyal to his boss. She's trying to induce the rage of two individuals - you and your bf's boss. Second, your bf can always get another job and do his best to avoid her. I understand that this is probably one of the last things you want to do, but it's definitely safe.

Another biggie - MISUNDERSTANDING. Sometimes people do things without having any specific intentions - no matter how obvious it would be. As such, maybe the girl is simply fooling around with your bf. Of course, I never said this was an acceptable behaviour, because she should be aware that you are with him. Or is she?...Ask yourself all these questions, and you'll start realizing that solutions are coming your way. But always base your decisions by remembering two things - love and trust. The more you love, the more natural trust will develop. The more trust and the more trustworthiness is in a person, the stronger the relationship.




IN CONCLUSION: Be careful. There are many decisions out there that can be dangerous. I find no right in judging this case because I want the best for you and your bf, and if I know that my decision wasn't the best, then it would be my fault. Most likely, you know your bf more than I do, as well as this girl.


3 steps:
1. Search out the possibilities
2. Judge the circumstances
3. Decide.

Answer 2

First, It's alright to be "JEALOUS" to some extent, but I know what you mean, you don't want to be known as the one who always is "nitpicking" about every girl who even just talks to your man.

But it's really about TRUST, I mean are you Really serious with your man? That is the issue, and do you trust him?

I was in a relationship once where BOTH I and teh girl I was dating cheated on each other, it was one of the MOST awful things I ever did(number two on my list actually next to the ignorance of animal exploitation) .... but i mean we both would tell each other that we loved each other and well it was an unhealthy relationship, we were kidding each other...wasting time in the unemployment line(out of context but it just came to my head)... I guess it correlates with the who "job" 'aspect of your question....

But anyways if your boyfriend truly is bothered by it I;m sure he would/could tell a supervisor above his boss or something...now I do not know what kind of workplace you are talking about...for example at AMERICAN APPAREL or the PLAYBOY MANSION thioe kind of comments you say the girl is making may be a common type of "talk" around the office. But if it's just like some stock broker job or something well unless their business is in investments of such "low cut tops" well there really should not be that kind of talk......

What would I do WELL hopefully I would be with a mate who loved me and well it would have never even got to this point of YAHOO QUESTIONS.

Answer 3

leave it alone. if your bf is being honest with you and you trust him let him vent to you about it and drop it. the last thing he needs is you to show up at his job and make a sceen. however, you CAN start marking your territory a little more. if you can, stop by t drop off lunch, ask him to hand a cute picture of you two togeter on the wall or in a frame on his desk. call him just to say hi, QUICKLY, and send him to work with a home made lunch or other yummie guy friendly snacks to share with the office. make her realize that you and him are solid and there is nothing she can do to destroy that.

if it still bothers you, let your bf know that although you trust him his stories make you a little uncomfortable and you would appreciate it if he could possibly ask his boss if she would be allowed to have a waiting area where she could wait for him so that he can have full concentration on the project he is working on.

Answer 4

she just likes the attention - pay no attention to her, she's a silly ho. Is he trying to get you to be jealous? Honestly if things keep getting worse have a serious talk with him. If you confront the girl it may put your boyfriend in an akward situation with his boss - and he may take it out on you. It may be harmless flirting - because she ends up going home with the boss - not your man.

Answer 5

heyyyyyyyyy hi,listen ur bf loves u and not her.its just the situation that she is his boss's gf,so he is compelled to talk to her.so let him,u be confident.u know him better than her,so if u r afraid that she is attractin g ur bf,then u do know what attracts ur bf so do it.one the other hand he loves u.if he really is not honest he'll never tell these to u.if he is telling that means he is not even cared about all these deviations.if he haas someothr intentions he would never tell u.so be ur self do what he like more,be like he wants u to be,and keep calling him on office hrs,take more care,go out regulary to lonely places(where u can have some privacy,but dont let him touch u,he'll loose theattraction,if u do that,but dont be very rude)ok so let him free and dont bother to think or talk about it too much.and ask him to be careful bcos if something happens she might use it otherwise and caus e some problems for him at work place.ask him to be in his own limits and to keep her in herlimits.ok .take care of urself and ur bf.hope u have nice time(together).byeeeeeeeeeeeee
CHRIS

Answer 6

Be careful with this one, if you're man constantly tells you about her behavior, have HIM confront her in a way that is courteous, but gets the point across. You don't want to do it and appear like the phyco girlfriend...keep in mind it's the bosses girl, who's to say that your words to her won't effect your boyfriends job, play it cool, but I think you're guy should say something

Answer 7

that's commonplace and could go away. before you're babysitting, ask your daughter if there is something effective she ought to prefer to do with the baby. Then both of you may do it mutually. do not worry if its form of irrelevant or unrealistic (like "she will be able to allure to with crayons") the point is to grant your daughter some administration in an excellent interest that includes the baby. this may also be a sturdy time to introduce slightly one doll on your 2 year old so as that she will be able to have her infant to observe too!

Answer 8

Being a man, I know that some women test other men....it is obvious that your boyfriend is being faithful due to I'm telling you about it. But, is she to the one that you should worry about, or is it him? If you don't want to hear it, tell him not to tell you. I am nice to females and my girlfriend thinks that I am flirting wit them, but she is the only one for me... but being the bosses girl, it makes it Little harder form him as to tell her not to talk to him....Tell your man to try and ignore the flirting and just not give her the time of day....She is just attention starved and getting it from te wrong person.

Answer 9

well, first off, he isn't gonna do something with her. He's not going to cheat on you with her, and he probably is honestly trying to get her to stop, he just might not be trying as hard as possible. You can take action, go for it, its your right. No one else should be flirting with your bf, he's yours. If a guy were to flirt with you, what would your boyfriend do? Probably kick his butt or somehow get rid of him right? You can do the same, and have fun being mean to the girl too, she deserves it. My girlfriend always tells me if some girl is hitting on me, she will beat the crap out of the girl. Tell her she needs to stop talkin to your man or else you'll take action.

Answer 10

Well, he prob doesn't want to be rude since it is his boss' girl. But it sounds like he is being open to the conversations...if he reacted differently and made it apparent that it was inappropriate, she wouldn't communicate that way. He prob likes the attention...but in order not to feel guilty he tells you about it. He should be careful though...if his boss catches wind of the convos...he may not be getting that raise he derserves.