2006-07-31 11:07:59 · 29 answers · asked by cathy o 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Controlling what others want or need is impossible. You can only control what you do & accept the facts in front of you. Allow yourself to greive for the 8 years, remember the good times, then reflect what you've learned in that experience.
Focusing on his choices does you no good. It only makes you feel inadequate & stops you from finding your true future! Things happen to us for a reason... so feel however you need to feel to get over it, but do just that, get over it, cause there's someone or something waiting for you around the corner & you won't find it & it may just pass you by if you' re still stuck pining over him & whomever he moves on toward. Remember... it's not about her or even him anymore, cause the reality is it's your life now... so what are you going to do with it?
P.S.- if you find you just can't get over him, perhaps seeing a therapist will help you move on? Either way... Good Luck!
2006-07-31 11:28:40 · answer #1 · answered by Doug 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Time is the answer. You were together for eight years, people change, maybe you changed, or him. Less sophisticated??? In what way...or maybe just different. Don't kick yourself over this. Eight years is a long time. Without knowing the circumstances apart from the fact you are no longer together, it's hard to really help. Relationships are so very personal and even if you try and explain to someone else, they'll never get it. Perhaps you're feeling a little jealous as he is with someone else. Don't rush into another relationship just to prove a point. Take your time, keep your cool and enjoy the single life, you can do and go where you want to.....take some time out and figure out where you stand. it's more a case of regrouping, growing strong and being yourself again. Good luck hunny with your future...it's only just beginning. YV XXXX
2006-07-31 18:18:42 · answer #2 · answered by minitheminx65 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl I know you hate it cuz it's happened to me. Just get over him because he left. Forget that she's not as sophisticated. it happens all the time. usually guys just want to be with women because they're sweet to them or they feel good when they're around them. they can be butt ugly and for some men it doesn't matter. don't think that your sophistication, good looks, familial status and things like that make you have an upper hand on less fortunate chicks. Believe me, I've had that attitude. The truth is, guys are with chicks because of how we make them feel. Not for how sophisticated we are. Something better will come along. Believe me.
2006-07-31 18:16:36 · answer #3 · answered by puuurfect_kitty_kat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That sucks i don't see how guys could just leave someone like that. Hes such a loser for that. There's really no way to get over it 8 years is a really long time! The best thing is just to let time pass and try to go out! There's plenty of good guys out there! Sorry but hey it's his loss!
2006-07-31 18:12:47 · answer #4 · answered by not_your_average*chick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's funny how the feeling of injustice overpowers your feeling of loss, isn't it? Just remind yourself that love doesn't award itself to the most qualified applicant. The human being is designed to hook up with someone similar, not superior. If you truly are a sophisticate compared to this girl, then assume he got tired of trying to keep up with your refinement and decided to go for someone effortlessly compatible with him. There's a shortage of cultured, respectable women in the world-- it won't take you long to find someone who absolutely appreciates you and meshes better with your lifestyle.
2006-07-31 18:19:26 · answer #5 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What does being less sophisticated have to do with it?
And sophisticated in what? Maybe she has sophistication in something that you are lacking, and that is what he was looking for?
Being arrogant and catty about it won't bring him back...
2006-07-31 18:11:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It wasn't meant to be.
Consider it a blessing you found this out earlier so that you can go and try to find someone who you won't leave you for someone less sophisticated than you.
2006-07-31 18:12:15 · answer #7 · answered by cantankerous_bunch 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow im going through the same thing but we were married- ive come to the conclusion that it flat out sucks to be replaced- especially by someone "lower" then yourself- it would be more acceptable if they went to someone that you would be able to see why -better looking, better job ect. -i dont know how to get over it and it hurts everyday - but ive told myself that i need to worry about how this can make me a better person and what i need to do that will make me happy- do something for yourself that you were not able to do in your relationship- just keep your head up and keep smiling and remember that you will get over it even though it may take a long time . and dont let him know that it hurts you it feeds his power over you, good luck
2006-07-31 18:16:35 · answer #8 · answered by sexysnowboarder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
8 years? I hate to say it but if he wasn't willing to marry you after 8 years then he probably never will. Just know that you are better then that and you will find someone that will treat you right
2006-07-31 18:12:42 · answer #9 · answered by Karce 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know? That would be very hard for me, i'v been with my husband for 8 yrs married 5. i hope you can find the answer your looking for!
2006-07-31 18:11:45 · answer #10 · answered by Sassy 24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋