verbally abuse my x gf what can i do to get her back?

Question

i hurt her but never knew i had a problem i seek help and now i have improve my life i am taking anger management counseling in palm beach and it has help me alot, i still keep in contact with my x gf, but when i try to get close she pushes me away, when she finds out i m having fun and meeting other women she gets jeolous and hangs up the phone on me or when i go on trips she sends me nice things. but she never calls me i m always calling her what i dont understand when i call her she is always happy to hear from me and never wants to get off the phone always asking me when will i call her again, asking many personal questions like she still my girl
my friends tell many things, they say she either scare to come back to you becuase of what u put her thru
other says she s playing games with u becuase she doesnt want u but doesnt want anyone to have you
what do you ?????? help me out cuz i dont know what to do but i will like a second chance to make it better

Answer 1

Part of anger management is accepting responsibility for your actions and accepting the consequences of them. You can talk to her and tell here that you deeply regret what you did and said, but more than likely its over.

Answer 2

Sweetie, be up front and honest with this girl and just tell her the truth, that U've made alot of mistakes and U are willing to do whatever it takes to hers again. Tell her U realize what U did to her was wrong and U want to make things right so that U two can be together again. Ask her to please give U a chance to show her that U have changed and that U just dont want to spend the rest of Ur life without her. Tell her U miss Ur best friend and Us well as Ur lover and U truly want that back only this time it will be better than ever,if she would just give U 1 more chance to prove it too her.
Now after U've said this, ask her out.
When she says yes, then it's time for U to get to work.
Plan something VERY special, after U've been with someone for a while U loose the excitement of the chase, the thrill of impressing the other person. Now's Ur chance, plan a romantic dinner, maybe in a nice resteraunt or in the park, some place intimate. Flowers, candles, put ALOT of thought into this.
If U really want her back and U really want this to work then U've gotta pull out all the stops. Treat her like the princess she is and show her that Ur act of kindness is heartfelt.
Try this, hey it couldnt hurt. If ya want her back what do U got to loose????? Go For it

Good luck, and I hope things work out with U. Just the fact that she can't move and let U go tells me that there's still hope for U two.

Answer 3

It sounds like she is confused. I lived with somebody who verbally abused and for many years I either took it, or believed he'd change; and he did-after we split up and he changed because he wanted to not because anybody else wanted him to, but he changed for the better and that's what counts.
It gets to the stage we change, and want better because we feel it isn't right with what we are tolerating. We know we don't deserve it and it sounds like she is somewhere in the middle there.

Have you two thought of giving each other a break. No contact!
See how you do without each other, it can take time to get used to the new routine and let go of the past.
It doesn't mean you'll not see each other again but it giving you both space to think without being influenced by emotions that had filled your heart and maybe still seeking. Maybe both still want each other and absence does make the heart grow fonder, or we separate totally, letting go of the old emotions that we cling to.

She may be scared, but she's definately confused, as you are........give each other time apart to learn your true feelings underneath.

I wish you all the happiness in the world, and it's nice to know you can see your own negative traits, because we can see you want to and can improve on them.
Good for you and all the best!

Answer 4

I would send here this question that you are asking and let her know that you really care and would like to have a second chance and make sure she knows that you are in therapy tell here if she will give you another chance that you will spend the rest of your life trying to make up for the wrong that you did and your goal is to make her feel like a Queen every day for the rest of your lives and if she will give you a chance you will prove it

Answer 5

It's a little bit of both....she's afraid to come back even though she wants too...hence she doesn't want anyone to have you so she's playing games.

This is her problem now...the balls in her court. You should give her an ultimatum and let it stand there. See if she bites...if not then move on with your life. Just make sure you have learned from your mistakes and don't treat the other girl as badly as you treated this one. But in turn don't let someone walk all over you because your afraid of treating them badly.

Answer 6

thats a hard one.
been there done that way to many times.
talk it from this lady you still have a chance. if you did not she would not talk to you.

just give it time you need to prove to her that you are trying to change. let her know what steps you have taken and that you have relized you were wrong.

just take things slowly and see what happens but what ever you do do not push her or guilt her to coming back to you. you will loose her that way. she needs to decide what she wants and if you are it then you are it if not you have to let her go.

best thing to do is to talk and date small dates dinner, a walk, a coffee things like that. you need to show her and thats the best way.
also do not push her for sex or a kiss you do not want to push her away take it slow and easy and let her come to you.

good luck.

Answer 7

You blew it big time, buddy, but I'll tell you what would work wonders for me.

Send her a bouquet of flowers every day for a week...vary the kinds of flowers. Write her a letter telling her what about her you love, and try to keep it about her character and not her appearance. Write a sincere poem about her and lay the emotion on thick. Tell her you want to take her to a super fancy restaurant.

I know I would not be able to resist!

Answer 8

My aunt is going throe the same thing.shes 18 and is in collage she meet this guy named Andrew a few months before school any way when she broke up with him she found out he was mentally crazy (really he was) and he told my aunt that he was going to kill him self if she did not go out with him but what iam getting at is shes always telling me that all she wants with him is a friend ship and maybe if they can be friends for a few years then maybe they could try it again maybe Thad's what you need to do

Answer 9

I'm glad you're seeking help. But you have already done damage to this girl. She will not want to repeat that with you or anyone else.

Get your life together and find someone to make a new start with. Much luck to you!

Answer 10

It appears as though you really like / love her.

Everyone is screwed up, and the fact that you have noticed your problem and are trying to fix it is good.

My adivce is to tell her that you are not going to call her anymore. You will gladly talk to her IF SHE CALLS, but otherwise you will go on with your life.

If she is really interested she will call, if not, you will know and be able to move on.

Whatever you do, DON'T GIVE IN AND CALL HER. Wait for her to call.