I am dating a married man and I'm tired of waiting for him to leave his wife. We have been dating for 3 years and its like a normal relationship except HE IS MARRIED. I didn't know he was married when we first started dating and after i found out I was too deep in love.
Now I am becoming impatient. He says he's going to leave her when the time is right. he's been saying that for the pass year in a half. He bought me an engagement ring, proposed and everything, but he's still with her. This man has bought me a car, condo, and we go on yearly vacations. His wife even knows about me!!
What should I do? There isn't any kids or anything so what's holding him back? I don't want to leave him but I'm becoming more stressful and it could only get worse if I stay. Any good advice?
2006-07-31 07:40:12 · 21 answers · asked by L Ann 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Girl if he wanted to leave his wife and be with you it definitely would not have taking this long. THREE YEARS!!!!!!!!!! That's three years of your life wasted. You need to find you a man who will give you all the attention you deserve. You may not be the only woman he is seeing, especially if his wife knows about you and does not care. She's probably use to it.
The question isn't when he's gonna leave his wife, its when is his wife going to leave him. And even if he does leave her for you (LOL) who's to say he won't do the exact same thing to you.
If I was his wife I would have fed your *** to the wolves a long time ago. Be greatful that she hasn't and move on. He's not leaving her and she's not leaving him.
2006-07-31 07:52:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
Well it seems like you are enjoying the perks of the relationship as well as him. So I would just take it for what it is worth, nothing more.
I feel he is not being completely honest with you and he is not telling you the full story in term of his feelings for his wife.
I see that he is not leaving her anytime soon, or he would have been left her.
He seems to know how to keep you semi quite by buying you things and keeping you pinned up in a condo, available at his convenience.
I feel what is holding him from leaving his wife and marrying you is the security and love that he still has for her. And, she is not letting go of him, despite of you, because she is living an even more grand life then you. She is not going to let that man go easily, she isn't crazy.
Another thing, she is aware of you, so if they divorce, she can get a lot of money from him for having an affair. He seems unwilling to give her a nice chunk of his earnings, so although he is not all that happy, he deals with her and keeps you on the side.
He is comfortable with the arrangements you, him and her have. He could not ask for more.
So if you don't want to leave him,don't,sounds like you got it good. But just know
you will never have him as you truly desire, so continuing on with him may be a helpless cause.
Don't live life in the dark,
Master Psychic Rachel
2006-07-31 08:07:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
First off I'm not going to degrade you.
He is just as wrong as you are.
I've been in your situation before, it didn't last as long, but the feelings were there.
First you need to leave him, because he will do the same to you. In fact the married man i was dating was seeing two other women besides me and one of them eventually got pregnant. There are so many men out there to love and who will love you how you want to be loved. At first it will be hard, but you know what you have to do.
Stop thinking with your heart and use your brain instead. That's where people go wrong. And the gifts he give you are only to keep you in, he buys his wife twice as much. Besides you're worth more.
Just move on slowly and you will find that he is such a waste of time.
The guy I was dating, left his wife and remarried, but he continues to cheat. Some men just don't know any better. The guy you're dating will never learn. Don't stay for who you hope he will become, leave for who he is. A CHEATER!!
2006-07-31 08:05:41 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
What in the World!!!!... Do you own a tv? Have you ever seen this same scenario played out on many... many bad movies, talk shows, soap operas, plays etc. In NEVER ends on a good note... even if (on those rare occassions) they do leave the wife. Why in the World would you place such little value on yourself and allow this negative behavior to happen or for that matter to continue. Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free. His ego is being stroked at YOUR expense. He has a wife at home and you on the side... WOW!! Haven't you figured out the male ego. Sure he buys you things... but unfortunately, you'll need to consider yourself a "kept" woman. Even more sad is the fact that a price tag is being placed on you. You've been bought.
If you had a daughter would you like to see her go through this same situation? What kind of advice would you give her? That man does not respect women or himself.
If you should ever marry, lets' hope you don't experience your husband creeping out on you regardless of your consent or knowledge. If this situation ends up happening to you during your marriage.. Would you be ok with it? It's called adultry. You will reap what you sow (what goes around... comes around). There is a price to be paid for that type of dysfunctional, selfish and unhealthy behavior. You must feel and know deep in your heart that you're being played. The gifts that you receive are mere trinkets to keep you around. No disrespect intended... but men who give gifts to women who are kept, don't value them more than the person who makes a living exchanging sex for money/favors/gifts. You need to realize how important and special you are... especially in God's eyes.
GET IT TOGETHER!!! STOP THE NEGATIVE BEHAVIOR. Kick that situation to the curb with a quickness. Serioulsy...WOW!
2006-07-31 08:07:07 · answer #4 · answered by 247 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seriously, re read your question. Your answer lies within the question.
1. You think he will not leave you for the next fling?
2. How would you like to be if you were his current wife?
3. He never told you he was married?
The signs are right in front of you. If he does leave his wife then he will not be with you. He is feeding you lines to keep you from running away. He likes you beucase you are his sex sidekick and trusts you enough that you wont tell.
You may doubt me, or all of your answers here but save the time, go on. Honnest!
2006-07-31 08:02:28 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am in the same kind of relationship and I am starting to realize that everyone is right and he is not leaving her. I would do this and I will myself tomorrow. Give him a time frame. girl you have waited 3 years. What is this mans problem? Mine has kids and I understand that it is hard to leave but your man does not have kids. I think if he really wanted to be with you he would have already left. I would walk away if he wont leave soon! I am taking my own advice and telling him tomorrow that its me or I'm gone. I love this man and I understand it is hard to walk away but you have 3 years invested. You could have already had these 3 years to share with someone else who would think you are worth being with. I wish you the best and I truly know how much it hurts to wait on someone you love but love yourself as well. YOU COME FIRST!!!
2006-07-31 16:42:11 · answer #6 · answered by lovelife 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Baby Girl,
I am going to be honest with you- if he has not left this woman in 3 years then most likely he is not planning on it! The truth to the matter is that if he really cares for you then he would get his act together. Girl give him a ultimatum and see if he gets his act together. If not then maybe it just not meant to be.
I have been in this situation before and I can say that it is not fun. I believe that a man can love two women at one time. Just take my advice and I can assure you that you can not go wrong!
2006-07-31 07:49:03 · answer #7 · answered by chasitygulley 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Join in on the fun of his marriage. If his wife knows about you, she probably may be interested in being with you, just so she wont loose her husband. If there are no attachements, you might as well joing the 3-some, bc it doesn't seem like he's giving her the boot anytime soon.
2006-07-31 07:43:27 · answer #8 · answered by qtiebabie06 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
U have got to be kidding right? How stupid can you be really? He is never going to leave her, and she's probably the one who's money he is using to buy you all this sh*t. You have made this situation very comfortable for him. he has you to f*ck when he's not f-ing her and all he has to do is buy your stupid *** somethung to keep you happy. You are so stupid you deserve to get played. Just remember "what goes around comes around". He's probably banging someone else besides you. Now that would be funny.
2006-07-31 08:02:15 · answer #9 · answered by dragonfly 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Lets see...your just a piece of a$$ and he ain't leaving her for you!!!
Too deep in love Bull crap...for the money you mean!!!! Keep it moving he don't want you.And you accepted a ring , don't you got no brain!!! your living in fantasy land...Get Real!!Get A Life!!
You'll Never Be Number One...Get Over It!!! Sloppy Seconds Is All You Are!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-07-31 07:48:36 · answer #10 · answered by XXSEXY66XX 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋