my bf is the personality with no intelligence or money
ok i dont really care about the money
he is secondary school drop out while im a uni grad
i dont dispise him, i am with him cuz he treats me very well, very considerate cuz he always remembers the little things..example i dont have to go 'take out all the pickles in my burger!', he will always order a burger without pickels for me 'automatically'
he really really loves me i can tell(no its not for sex), he wld save up just to buy me a nice ring, not some latest game console..
unfortunately when it comes to intellectual conversation i feel we just cant get it going on, he just lacks in that mental department
imagine talkin about serious discussion but your reply is like from a 16 year old.
my main issue is that im wondering if he remains this way with low income, how can i be sure our future together with our kid will be the best one i would like my family to have?
am i being too realistic? i feel confused..do i love him?
2006-07-31 05:01:50 · 22 answers · asked by acnemycin 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
personality and some intellengence
2006-07-31 05:06:04 · answer #1 · answered by mew69_77740 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmm thats a tough one Ive delt with that before. Try asking his opinion on things then ask why he chose what he did. It will get him thinking at least . Just dont over use this hell get sick of it. Leave books out see if hell read them. If he does ask how he liked it. Get him talking about stuff in general . The more conversations you have that arent the "norm" the more youll get him thinking. And never never put him down for his lack of education.
As far as raising kids together you two need to discuss your views on the matter ...Does he feel bad that he didnt graduate? Regret it? Will it be an important aspact to him for your children? Get him talking . Thats all I can really tell you. Be patient. His answers may not be what you expect or want but at least youll get answers and eventually they will change and grow as he does.
Watch the news and/or read the paper ...together. This will help him form opinions about current events. Once he feels educated on A subject talking about it shouldnt be a problem either.
About your future with him at a low paying job.....Does your job pay enoughfor both of you to live? Is there any potential for promotion at his job. If you really do love him then his job shouldnt be an issue. You can figure out money matters together. Help each other talk to each other and most of all listen to each other. Live within your means. and if you have a chance at happiness with him...go for it .
2006-07-31 05:14:51 · answer #2 · answered by Coyote 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The truth is.... even a dog has a personality.
Sure, he loves you because that's the only true thing he can give you. And he will love you until the time he has gotten too comfortable and secured that he has you. Then things will slowly change.
Haven't you seen movies that depict your situation? Will you be afraid to carry the relationship by yourself? Will you ever get tired of defending him when people make cruel comments about him?
Do you really love him?
2006-07-31 05:11:20 · answer #3 · answered by stardustalpha2010 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no ur not being too realistic...give him time...if u really love truly...frankly all these things wont bother you..in fact im sure u can find a way to solve the things that bother u...everybody will mature some day....maybe he's not matured in terms of thinking and havin serious talks but one day he will....time will tell all....all i can say is...if now...and i mean now..u really love him truly and u find him to be the perfect one for u now...dun think twice treasure the relationship u have with him...always think positive and only the positive things will happen. good luck...if u do have any questions...u can get back to me...take care :)
2006-07-31 05:10:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
for mi a combination of the above wil do the trick...
but it seem u r considerin his low income then i dont cal it love at the same time u r being realistic that i admire ...
remem love and reality does not mix so u either chose to be in a fantasy world or face reality...though some pple are lucky and also he cld just be lucky as well ........the choice is urs and becareful which road u take as both involve sacrifice ..,.........gud luck
2006-07-31 05:07:36 · answer #5 · answered by mimi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All of the above.
You definitely need to be attracted to the person, you will want to be able to carry on a reasonable conversation with the person, and you certainly don't want to have to fully support the person financially.
All of these things should be required when considering a potential lifelong mate.
2006-07-31 05:08:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, personally I think maybe you should talk to him about it. Maybe not go at it like...."DUDE YOU'RE STUPID!"..because by the sound of it you really do love each other! So, maybe if not the first solution, just look past it for a little while longer.!!! Good luck!
2006-07-31 05:07:16 · answer #7 · answered by lattegirlac1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a drop out is a NO NO for me, personality though. I don't believe in iq and intelligence. Well he's a drop out so yeah he wouldn't know or be able to talk. I don't many who have intelligent talks though!
2006-07-31 05:10:04 · answer #8 · answered by samantha wilson 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A combination of things. If he wants to finish his education I would encourage him. If he doesn't then you might want to love him for who he is, and have stimulating conversation with people outside the relationship.
2006-07-31 05:05:05 · answer #9 · answered by Justsyd 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sooner or later, the sex will die out....the looks will go 'south' and the money will be gone....
If you have nothing to talk about now, what makes you think you will have anything to talk about later.
You have a big decision on your hands.....good luck.
2006-07-31 05:06:41 · answer #10 · answered by a1quick57 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
personality and intelligence is the most inportant thing in a choose a guy. I think your bf loves you alot. I think its best to stay with him and see what happens.
2006-07-31 05:07:56 · answer #11 · answered by vicky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋