What is you favorire " You might be a redneck " joke ?

Question

Here is mine.......
You might be a redneck if Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey, y'all watch this!"

Answer 1

If your mother refuses to take the Cigarette out of her mouth before she tells the State Patrolman to kiss her a-s-s.

You might be a REDNECK.

Another favorite is

If you go to family reunions to meet women... you might be a REDNECK

If you've ever had your nipple bitten off by a beaver

If your richest relative buys a new House and you have to help take the wheels off.

If you walk your child to school because you are in the same grade.

If you've ever taken a beer to a job interview.

If while giving direction to your house the first words are LEAVE THE PAVED ROAD.

Answer 2

If your family tree doesn't branch out, you might be a redneck.

This coming from the resident West Virginian!! Long live the rednecks!

Answer 3

Hi Wendy !!!

Hey, after reviewing the answers, I am understanding the "redneck" concept, let me think about one... Am I a redneck for that?

Answer 4

If your girlfriend's hairdo has ever been destroyed by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.

If your dog passes gas and you claim it, you might be a redneck.

Answer 5

A redneck walks into a hardware store and asks for a chain saw that will cut 6 trees in one hour. The salesman recommends the top of the line model. The redneck is suitably impressed, and buys it.

The next day he brings it back and says, "This chain saw is defective. It would only cut down 1 tree and it took all damn day!"

The salesman takes the chain saw, starts it up to see what's wrong, and the puzzled redneck says, "Heck, what's that noise?"





One day, in a small town in the middle of no-where, a redneck wearing nothing but jeans and suspenders was pumping gas into his pinto at the local gas station. To his surprise, a rich man in a Ferrari pulled up next to him to pump gas into his $600,000 car. As the rich man was pumping gas he looked over at the bewildered redneck. Noticing the admiration on his face the rich man asked, in a cocky tone, "what, you wanna race farm boy?" Not one to back down to a challenge the redneck replied in a defiant tone "I sure do city boy!"

Shortly after that, the two men had there cars lined up on a super long stretch of straight road. The two men were standing in between the two cars discussing how to insure a fair start.

They finally concluded that the rich man would hold up 3 fingers and do a count down. When the last finger dropped they would go for it. So the rich man opened his door and stepped into his car, then the redneck walked around to the door of his car and climbed in.

The rich man started the count down and when the last finger fell they took off.

The rich man decided to toy with the redneck and only shift up to second gear, but by the time he got to full speed in second gear the pinto was just a dot in his rear view mirror. "What a waste of time." the rich man thought.

suddenly, RRRRROOOOOOMMMMMM!!! The pinto went roaring by.

"Whoa!" the rich man said. So then he shifted up into 3rd then 4th gear to still give the redneck a sporting chance. Once again the pinto became a dot in his rear view mirror.

RRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!!! To thee rich man's surprise the pinto went flying by again!

"FINE!" The rich man shouted. So then he went all out, shifting up into 6th gear and putting the pedal to the floor. By now the Ferrari was doing about 210 Mph. The Ferrari blew by the pinto and once again the pinto became a tiny speck in his rear view.

RRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!!! The pinto blew by him again, practically blowing the Ferrari's doors off.

Having been beaten by the pinto the rich man pulled over to the side of the road and stopped. In a rage he got out and slammed his door as the redneck backed up next to his car.

"WHAT KIND OF MOTOR DO YOU HAVE IN THAT PINTO!" Shouted the rich man.

The redneck climbed out of his Pinto shaking like a nervous Chihuahua and replied, "I have no idea, BUT I GOT MY SUSPENDERS CAUGHT IN YOUR DOOR!!"

Answer 6

if you ever used jumper cables to "jump start" your computer you might be a redneck

Answer 7

you might be a redneck if:
your living room furniture has ever become your lawn furniture.

Answer 8

If all you need on moving day is a tow hitch.

Answer 9

iv nva heard of dem jokes

Answer 10

.....if someone yells "Hoedown!", and your girlfriend hits the floor.

OR

....if you've ever been accused of lying through your tooth.