Is it normal for a little boy to worry about death?

Question

I have a seven year old son. Last night he asked me if God granted wishes. I told him no that is not what God did. He started crying a little and when I asked him why, he said because he didn't want to die. I told him that he was a little boy and he didn't have to worry about that for a long time and he said he knew, but that when it was his time to die he didn't want to. Do seven year olds worry about this kind of thing to the point of tears? He has seen a lot of death in the last couple of years, His great grandpa and his uncle, only 34 yrs old, and two of his great aunts real recently. Do you think that I should take him to talk to someone?

Answer 1

I think that at this point, if he asked once or twice, then he is normal. I think at some point, all children open their eyes and finally the concept of death clicks in their heads. It causes fears and anxieties and questions that are normal. You are your child's first counselor, and the best thing you can do is talk to him until he is satisfied. It may take weeks to make him feel at ease. If it goes on for a long time and he starts to become paranoid, then sure, go to therapy. Other than that, handle it yourself......sometimes therapists find problems that arent' there.

Answer 2

Well no, I Don't think you have something to worry about - he has seen something on TV or heard something at school which has frightenend him and he is too young to fully comprehend death and so at that age kids fear everything, especially what they do not understand. As a child his age I Cried similarly but not because I Was afraid to die, but I Was afraid that my parents and friends would die (God Forbid) But I Grew Out of it. So I Think just talk to him as you have, do not make too big a deal of it - He does not have any psychological problems.

P.S: Oh, I did not read that some relatives passed away recently, this has most likely initiated this fear of death, but I still think it is perfectly normal. He is probably emotionally underdeveloped and is having a little trouble coping with the idea of people going forever, He's probably been fed stories about where people go after they die, or that they sleep forever - all this really is enough to scare the hell out of a child - my 9 year old brother was told at some religious school that if he did not pray he would go to hell - what a thing to tell a child - but since then he is terrified of not praying.

I Don't personally condone counselling I believe it causes people to display psychosymatic symptoms - If they feel they need counselling they become worse - but obviously if the problem persists then there may be something more to it and he may need help. Otherwise it is normal, and I Would not worry - I Grew out of it in the space of a couple of years, it still resurfaces but it may be a sign of insecurity, he does not like to be alone. Stay with him for a while at night, as in stay at his bedside while he sleeps or something and reassure him you are there.

Answer 3

There is nothing wrong with your son psychologically, he is just reaching out to you, he doesn't want to lose you or ever leave you, and from the number of deaths he's been around recently puts fear in him, I would suggest talking to him yourself, and if it doesn't help, then yea take him to talk with a professional, but I wouldn't let them put him on medication, he is a normal kid acting out from what he's experienced, they know only what they've been taught, medication could and VERY possibly will make it worse, he doesn't need a crutch in life, he needs to fall down and get back up and try again and occasionally be lifted up by you; when he can't do it on his own, to know he is loved and that you'll always be there, maybe not in person but in his heart and memories, and that he'll always be with you no matter where you are.

Answer 4

Yes, talk to a grief specialist or call your local mental health center to pick up some pamphlets. Try taking him to the library and helping hi find books about death and dying.

Obviously he is interested in dying...seems like a lot of folks in his life are dying and he needs more info.

Some people are born with an old soul, my son was. He told me when he was about your son's age that he wanted to go to heaven because he missed our dog and he wanted to be with the dog. I took him for counseling and the counselor helped him sort things out.

Your son does not seem to be worried per se, but it is on his mind alot...but it has been a big factor in his life lately.

Answer 5

It's perfectly normal. I remember that I was really really afraid of death at that age. It's related to the fact that the child is starting to realize more and more about the boundaries of his/her own ego. He will pass this period in his own time.

When he asks something I would recommend only answering to the exact questions and not explaining too much. And if you don't know something for sure then you should tell that you don't know. Honesty is the most important thing. Just hold and comfort him. I remember my mom doing just that.

Answer 6

Definitely let him talk to someone. My son, by the time he was 7 he'd done the same thing, gone thru several deaths, but, he was able to grieve. For several years he'd say I'm sad, I'd say about what, and he'd say of papa passing away.
As to your son, he's scared and confused. Let him talk to a professional, just to learn the grieving process.

Answer 7

yes i think you should because i think he is upset about all the deaths in your family. and after all that happened in your family it is normal for him to think that. take him to a therapist where he can talk about his problems & get help with that situation & the therapist could also tell you as a mother what to do. reassure him that all the people who passed are in a better place and that he is not gonna die because it is not his time to go yet . . . . he still has a hole life ahead of him.

Answer 8

Sure take him to a counselor. Won't hurt him one bit. It in fact might help him and you a great deal!

Kids at different ages get scared and usually it is out of the blue. Dealing with this now might prevent him in the future from acting out in a negative way.

Answer 9

I think it is normal for kids to have a fear of death. The good thing is that your son is talking about it which provides you the opportunity for a healthy discussion.

Answer 10

its normal for a boy to think about death everyone worries about death not even little boys ,when its time to go then you must accept it cause everybody dies right its hard to accept death but that's life i know when my dad dies when i am still young i cried but then a couple of months past i just forget about it and go on with my life