my son 3 years old is very stubborn and never does what i say, help?

Answer 1

Firstly, don't stop telling him what to do, he'll just learn he can beat you.

Don't give in, its the age, most three year olds start to test the boundries, you just make sure they are fixed and he should get the lesson eventually.

Of course, kids do test the boundries right up until they move out. Keep being consistent, and he'll get the picture.

Answer 2

Normal 3 year old behavior.

I babysit a 3 year old right now who can be stubborn but you just have to make sure he realizes you make a lot of the decisions. But you need to let him have some choices.

Instead of telling him "Put on your clothes" (if it's not a special day for anything) maybe give him a couple choices.

There is a book called "Your Three Year Old", that might help you understand more about the changes they go through at that time of age.

Answer 3

Okay, I've been there and in a way still there. You have a "spirtited child" or "strong willed child" or whatever other term you want to use. I have one too...he turned 6 yesterday and there was a time I honestly though he'd kill me before he got there.

The key is to find a way to balance his strong spirit (without breaking it) and still find peace in your home and have a child the listens to you and behave. The books and teachers and even doctors can't offer suggestions if they've never delt with these special children.

First, tell yourself that you child is special, he's independant, self-secure, and confidant. Those are amazing traits to have as an adult and you don't want to teach him that they are bad traits to have.

Second, figure out how to live in harmony....my son loved just having a choice. Okay, so he can't have cake for breakfast and he starts a fit, just let him pick from acceptable options. Don't overwhelm him with options but do give 2-3. Helping pick up could be accomplished by making a game (my son loved to race). We also made a lot of 'deals.' He hated going shopping and would dig in his heels and throw a fit, refusing to get out of the car. I would deal with him...he could help push the cart, get a treat at the end or even blow bubbles if he sat nicely in the basket.

Third....I monitored his diet very closely. I found the processed sugar and food coloring typically brought out the 'monster' in him. It was hard to totally cut them out and he protested but when they weren't in the house.... We found that frozen banana's on a stick was yummy and fun to make and fresh lemonaid made with Splenda was even better then koolaid.

Just know that he's stubborn because he thinks he can do it all (which of course he can't). Just keep working through it and know that sometimes there isn't a solution, you just have to dig in your heels too. Never give in....NEVER! Once you do, he's won and will forever win. Think hard before you threaten a punishment because likely you'll have to act on it and I always tended to punish myself instead (like canceling a playdate away and thus canceling that much needed hour to myself).

Good luck!

Answer 4

While I don't advocate "beating" your child, a firm spank on the bottom is well deserve in your case. My children have rarely been spanked, but they do listen well afterward. Three is a very difficult stage. The are trying to figure out just where they stand with you. How much they can get away with.. and sometimes, how you react amuses them. When my children were about that age, I came across a book called 1-2-3 Magic. Believe me when I tell you, that it was like magic. It worked, and I didn't have to yell, spank and bribe them to do the right thing. Of course it doesn't work over night. You have to be firm in following the "rules" yourself. But after a couple of days, they get the idea and begin following your directions.

Answer 5

I UNDERSTAND THE PAIN!!!
I have a three year old that refuses to listen to anything. I think I may have the most stubborn toddler on earth. Spanking him doesn't phase him sometimes. What has been working lately is taking away what he loves and isolation. He's a drum player (day and night) so I take his drum sticks and send him to his room. After his punishment is over, I ask him if he's ready to do whatever it is, usually he is by then if he hasn't cried himself to sleep. I also talk to him and explain why it's so important to do what I say. Once, I pretended to cry ( I know that sounds strange) when he got out of hand and he hated to see his mama cry so bad that he cried and did what I asked. Praise him for being nice and following directions whenever he does. This is the only thing that has helped.
I don't know what your philosophy is, but sometimes a good a** beating is what they need. It's better for us parents to beat them than for them to grow up out of hand and the cops have to beat them, or worse, they start beating us. Let him know who's boss, but pick your battles wisely for your own peace of mind. Everything doesn't deserve a big fuss and fight.
I hope this helps you. Good luck my dear, GOOD LUCK!

Answer 6

Guess what? You have a normal 3 year old, they are all stubborn at that age. You have to be firm and consistent. He is going to test you because he needs to know exactly where the boundaries are.

Answer 7

At three you have to start disciplining him. Use a time out chair. Remember you are the parent and he is the child. Children seem to think they can do what they want because the parent allows them to. Take charge he is only three.

Answer 8

The more you push a donkey the more it rebels. You need a carot; then donkey thinks s/he *wants* to move forward.