so my bf and i are different religions he is christian i am catholic it is very hard his father is a pastor and all...we want to get married but it just seems impossible..with religion...i am going to go to his church to try it out but he wont go to mine...in a way thats not fair...he montions that also if i dont like the way his religion is then it might just end there with me and him or maybe it wont....what do i do? i dont feel appreciated for the effort i am doing...help!!!
2006-07-30 19:01:10 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
He's acting like a manipulative jerk.If he won't respect your beliefs, you're setting yourself up for an unhappy marriage.And your right, it isn't fair.You need to demand that he give you the respect you give him.Religion is a sore point with alot of people, but his behavior is unacceptable and bordering on passive-aggressive.What's to stop him from pulling the same argument over another subject, like children?If you don't agree to this and that maybe I'll leave you, maybe I won't.Seriously, ditch the jerk.You deserve better than emotional blackmail.
2006-07-30 19:09:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It looks like there's trouble in paradise here....
Religious conviction can be a fundamental part of our personalities. The fact that you're raising this issue here tells me that you are not comfortable with what's going on.
If the religious issue is so important for both of you, you should consider whether this is likely to improve. What will happen in 5 years? What will happen in 10 years time? Will things change? For the better or for worse?
And what about his ultimatum? Do you think you are a worthy person? Do you have high self steem?
Don't compromise yourself over religion.
Dump the guy, move on with your life, and get someone who appreciates you for who you are, and what you believe in. If he's offering conditional love, this whole marriage thing is likely to end up in a heartache (a very expensive one, taking into account lawyers fees).
If you don't do this, you'll only have yourself to blame for anything that goes wrong later on.
Don't let me tell you "I told you so". =)
2006-07-31 02:10:41 · answer #2 · answered by SkinnyJeff 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Christian and Catholic?
They're the same religion. Catholic is a different sect of Christianity, like Protestant.
It's the same damned religion.
2006-07-31 02:05:08 · answer #3 · answered by Arsh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first of all, you both need to educate yourselves and come to appreciate and respect the other's church. For your information, Catholicism is a denomination within Christianity. You are both christians, you should be able to resolve whatever differences you have.
Having said that, if his attitude is one of expecting you to make all the concessions you need to seriously consider what that says about your relationship in general.
2006-07-31 02:07:15 · answer #4 · answered by keri gee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello,
I think it's unfair for your husband to refuse to go with you and explore your religion. I know from other peoples experiences that if one partner has tendencies not to share the things you like from the beginning then there is no hope for later. I'm really sorry to say. I hope it all works out for you and if he is really the one, he should take an interest in your likes and dislikes. I pray things change in your husband and wish you all the best.
2006-07-31 02:09:49 · answer #5 · answered by PussyCat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
different religious beliefs can damage a relationship. and it;s definitely not fair that he wont go to your church, at least once or twice to decide if he doens't like it. The problem with protesatants is they are almost completely anti-catholic, adn that idea has been ingrained into their head. So you should tell him that it's not fair that he won't go to your church.
2006-07-31 02:06:29 · answer #6 · answered by Chris K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The Bible tells us plainly that we should not be unequally yoked. In other words...if one knows Christ as Savior and the other doesn't... it's not gonna work, and it is a sin. When there are two different religions in the household, that just causes chaos. If you or your BF do not know Christ as Savior I would love to help.
In Christ,
Sabrina
2006-07-31 02:08:50 · answer #7 · answered by SS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you should be convinced of what you're doing...
Secondly, if you're doing something (especially for a husband), don't do it expecting the return... Do it because you WANT to do it... Same applies on him...
Speak openly with him, then to your family, and maybe to his family also.... Decide what's good for you, for your life and for your happiness...
Best of luck...
2006-07-31 02:13:37 · answer #8 · answered by toon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough one! I guess I would ask him, "If I attend your church but fall out of it...would it be better that I drop out of church altogether?" See what he says. If he refuses you to leave his church or church altogether (I don't suggest it) then...I would definately consider sticking with your own: being equally yoked.
Good luck!
2006-07-31 02:27:56 · answer #9 · answered by p2sgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump him!
Thumbs down Spartacus.
2006-07-31 02:28:27 · answer #10 · answered by Doug B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋