Just curious...would you marry...?

Question

Would you date or even marry someone that didn't follow the same religious beliefs as you?

Like for instance, A Christian, would you marry a Pagan?

I'm curious if you let your beliefs effect someone you that might ultimately be the right one for you!
And I don't want "Well, god wouldn't let me marry someone that doesn't follow his teachings" cause that's not what I'm asking.

Thanks!

rockEsquirrel - but why follow the "easier" life path if it's the perfect person for you? I don't understand why let something so minute get in the way of love?

Answer 1

Some years before I met my present husband, I had abandoned Christianity, and was leaning towards Judaism; the teachings made more sense to me.

When my husband (then sweetheart!) explained to me that he was Jewish, and could never marry outside his faith, well, I had to smile to myself, because I knew his dear late wife had been a Baptist!

We dated for a year, and fell so much in love that it made everyone around us gag. One day, when visiting relatives, his granddaughter was stuck for a way to introduce me; apparently, "This is my grandfather's girlfriend" didn't sound normal at all.

Within a month, he had come up with a ring, and we happily planned our wedding, which was performed by his friend from boyhood, now a judge...but, my beloved couldn't stop himself from stomping on a glass and calling out, "Mazel Tov!"

We've been attending synagogue together ever since.

So, is ours a mixed marriage...? Technically, yes. Does anyone around here give a toss...? I don't think so. Ah, but, does God care...? You know what...? I think he's pleased.

Answer 2

I am already married (very happily)... but if I weren't, or if my husband had had different beliefs than myself, I wouldn't have married him.

The simple reason is this: My faith is The Most important thing in my life. When two peopel are together, the big things are important that they can agree on and get along. If we can't agree on what, to me, is the most important thing, we can't live together happily.

This, I learned, because God's word does give instructions, if you will, on how to live life in peace with others. One of these 'instructions' is to not be 'unequally yoked' with unbelievers. This is NOT saying that we are better. To understand this you have to think of farming, you can hook up two horses to a plow to plow a field, or two oxen, but if you have one of each, the plow is uneven and cannot be used properly. Different animals cannot work together, because they do so differently. In the same way, a Christian and an athiest, or Muslim, or Jew, or Buddhist, etc. go through life with different values, morals, 'instructions', etc.

2Corinthians 6:14-16 "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?"

Answer 3

"I'm curious if you let your beliefs effect someone you that might ultimately be the right one for you!"

Well you see, that's the point of trusting in God and following his commands and not leaning to my own understanding. If someone I met was a beautiful, intelligent and good hearted pagan I still wouldn't marry her because ultimately she would be the wrong person for me even if we had a good marriage and a lot of fun over the years.

She would be the wrong person because as it is written:

Amos 3:3 Can two walk together, except they be agreed?

In other words, I would end up focusing on the temporal things and activities of this world instead of having a wife who was dedicated to being a partner in advancing the Kingdom of Christ here on earth. When it came time for the judgment of rewards for believers I would end up suffering loss and so "ultimately" I would have married the wrong person.

1 Corinthians 3:11 For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ. 12 Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble; 13 Every man's work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is. 14 If any man's work abide which he hath built thereupon, he shall receive a reward. 15 If any man's work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire.

Answer 4

Yes. There is no reason why two persons from 2 different religions cannot live harmoniously. Most religions fundamentally believe in similar ways of living and as long as there is respect of each other's beliefs & opinions, it's not harder than any other marriage. It can get confusing with kids. But, it is better have to make that decision before you get married.....because that could result in a challenge to the marriage

Answer 5

My beliefs are so much a part of who I am, that even if I love someone else so much, and he could not share that part of me. I would feel like I could not marry him, because the person he would want to marry, and the person I actually was, were two totally different people. Does that make sense?

In other words, religion is not just another category I fill out on your profile for me.

Answer 6

Yes, and I can tell you from experience, that being married to someone with a completely different religion is "very challenging." Hopefully, when 2 people love each other, share many of the same values and take similar actions in life (even if reasons for the actions are different), then they can enjoy life together. Religion is just about details.

Answer 7

I did, I dated a Mormon for 2 1/2 years, and I was raised in a household with no strong religious beliefs. That relationship caused so much stress and pain in the end, the next person I date, I will make sure has beliefs closer to my own. I don't believe in compromising my beliefs, otherwise I might still be with the Mormon, but I think a little precaution is not a bad thing. To say I refuse to date him because he is a catholic or a jew is wrong, but to ignore potential warning signs, such as you must convert to be with me, is reasonable. You have to think with your head and your heart.

Answer 8

I would if I felt it was truly right-- I think he'd have to be more of a neutral religion or denomination, though. I'd have to KNOW that we would be raising the kids in my religion-- otherwise, I'd feel like a horrible mother because I couldn't give my kids the best thing I think I could possibly give them-- my religion and its beliefs. It would definitely make life a lot easier to marry someone of the same religion, but if I feel it's right to marry someone who's not, then we'll figure things out.

I don't think I could marry an agnostic or atheist, though. All my life they would see me as a material, humanistic person with problems, but I would think of myself as a child of God, made in his image and likeness. There has to be a spiritual connection that goes along with love for your spouse.

Answer 9

I would and I have. However I have found a tremendous amount of women who will not date outside their religion.If you find a truly religious person you will find that this is the one point on which they will not bend.After all if they truly believe in their religion then how can you love one who does not since that person will not end up in the same place as you after death.I have known people who marry outside their religion and they say they are true believers alas how could they be. If you are a Christian and you believe that Jesus is the only way to heaven then obviously your spouse who does not believe in Jesus will not be in heaven with you and how could you love someone you knew would end up in hell.

Answer 10

I did 38 years ago. She is in the other room reading to our youngest son. I love her more today than I did when we first got married. She does not believe in God but she is a good person and follows the teachings of Jesus a lot better than many of the christians I have had dealings with.

You can't judge a person by the religous label they wear.

Love and blessings
don