Is it ok for a Christian man and woman to switch roles?

Question

I've been hearing a lot about a woman's "role" according to Christians. It got me to thinking...

Let's say John and Jane Christian get married (without ever having sex beforehand or living together or even touching beyond a chaste kiss). They are happy and blissfull, united in God's love. But let's say that John has a flare for cooking, childcare, and housework, and Jane has a brilliant mind for buisness. Would it be considered wrong, in the eyes of God, the bible, or the church, for Jane to be the breadwinner and John the housekeeper? Even if both are truly happy this way and otherwise live their lives as perfect and Godly as any other Christian couple?

What are the reasons for this? And I don't want any "I just think it's wrong." Give me reasons, people. And please, refrain from letting me know weather or not you yourself would live a life like this, but instead tell me if you think it's ok for someone else to do it.

Answer 1

my answer is pure and simple. the bible says when married a man and woman become one. so if we are one..what difference does it make what role we play. so yes it is ok for us to switch roles if we are in agreement... when we get married. now if someone in marriage objects.. it muddies the water a little bit huh?

Answer 2

There's nothing in the Bible that says a man has to be the bread winner. In fact in Proverbs 31 it describes the "Godly woman" as running her own business. I've known several good Christian couples that ran their lives like you describe without any obvious problems.

I believe that God made men and women differently. Men are supposed to be protectors over the women, the head of the household, and be spiritual heads. Women are supposed to be supportative of the husband, help with the kids, and be a sort of moral compass. Exactly how these roles play out in each couple's lives will vary greatly.

Answer 3

Titus 2:3-5 (King James Version)



3 The aged WOMEN likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;

4 That they may teach the young WOMEN to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

5 To be discreet, chaste, KEEPERS AT HOME, good, obedient to their own husbands, THAT THE WORD OF GOD BE NOT BLASHEMED.

1 Timothy 5:8 (King James Version)


8 But if any provide not for HIS own, and specially for those of HIS own house, HE hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

JUST A FEW EXAMPLES, RIGHT OUT OF GOD'S WORD!
It doesn't matter what the world thinks, it's what God thinks.That's the problem today with religion, men have contaminated God's word.But, that's what the Bible says will happen.It's not surprising.

My suggestion would be, read the Bible, don't take man's word for it, read GOD'S word.

God Bless you all!!

Answer 4

Out of the 1,000 so pages in a bible, there is ONE SENTENCE which says "Wives should submit to their husbands..." Apparently, this means that the man is supposed to make the major household decisions, and the woman is supposed to back him up.

Proverbs has a whole chapter about a woman who sews, and buys clothing, and trades, and earns interest on business, and she is supposed to be the ideal woman. Not a breath about cooking can be seen in this particular passage.

In the new testament book of Acts, there are a number of women who trade money, sell land for others, and deal with purple dye (a really expensive commodity in those days.)

There is nothing wrong with a woman engaging in business from a biblical standpoint, and nothing forbids a man from cooking or taking care of the children.

"Submitting" to a husband just means that the woman accepts the man's final decision. This is intended to keep the woman from nagging the husband, and ensuring that the man does serve as a "head of the household" in all that this role requires. If the husband tells the woman that he will take care of the kids, and she will earn the money, that should be fine.

The husband of course has to "Cherish" his wife, which probably involves doing things to make her life comfortable. Taking care of the kids, at least once in a while is probably part of this duty.

Answer 5

No matter where you go or what you do, you are going to find people in groups who push the envelope as far as they can. This is especially true with religion. People compete over who can be the most pious. So you'll meet one family where the woman doesn't work. The next family takes it a step farther: She doesn't work OR drive OR wear pants. I assure you that from a theological point of view it is not addressed. It's mainly a cultural thing, and mainly American, I think. A couple like the one you described would probably not stay with one of the conservative, traditional churches indefinitely, and that's the difference.

Answer 6

If you go to a church that still teaches "roles," I would suggest you pray about whether or not you are on the right track spiritually.

I am not majorly religious in the traditional sense, but even the Republican Baptist churches here in my local area stopped teaching that a VERY LONG TIME AGO.

Personally, I feel that a person should do whatever is most comfortable to them. If your husband wants to knit your son a sweater before cooking dinner, and you want to be CEO of Ford Motor Company, go for it!

ADDITION: Maybe you should seek advice for a spiritual leader outside of your current church and ask what he or she thinks.

Answer 7

LOL. Jane Christian sounds an awful lot like the wife in Proverbs 31. And John, God bless him, sounds like a very good husband, loving his wife even as Christ loves the church.
I would say, God has blessed this union. And what God has joined together, no man may put asunder.

Jane and John certainly have my blessing.

Answer 8

'roles' for men and women come from long outdated morals of male dominated societies. most of us here in the 21st century cast off those roles 40 years ago during the women's lib movement. women discovered they don't have to be defined by their husbands. they can have careers and run a family. or be single and not have a family at all. or a whole host of other combinations.
my goal was always to be a stay at home dad. i like kids and i coooking and i don't mind housework. your 'role' is whichever one you choose for yourself. if you, as a woman, want to stay at home then you may. if you want to go out and have a career then you may do that too. most men will not stay at home and run the house though because they cannot let go of their traditional roles as the breadwinner.

Answer 9

it may be wise of them to switch duties. I don't think that would be switching roles, per se. The man can still be the head of the house whom the wife submitted to if she worked and he stayed home.


The Bible commands the husband to love His wife as Christ loved the Church and gave himself for it. The wife is to submit to her own husband.

With your scenario, I don't think they have compromised anything.


Unless: She gets this big ego, and says to him, since I make the money, i'm the boss. I call the shots. Money and sex are not tools to be used against your mate, but assets to build a healthy vibrabrant marriage.

Great question.

Answer 10

I don't see how it would be wrong. It doesn't say anything in the
Bible about the roles of a husband and wife except that the wife
bears the children.