I regret doing this terribly. I have felt bad about it since I made the decision. However, im pregnant again and the father wants nothing to do with me. I'm only 20 and i'm already a single parent. Should I keep the baby and have to struggle or should I have an abortion and have to live with yet another regret on my conscience? Please Help.
2006-07-30 10:17:27 · 13 answers · asked by what_you_kneed 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Keep the baby. You'll live with that regret for the first one you had done for the rest of your life. Whenever you look at a little kid, be it your own or someone elses you will wonder if that kid could be like the one you...well it is a harsh word to say but it is the truth.....killed. Don't add to that tragedy by having another abortion.
Life is going to be rough and I am sorry the father wants nothing to do with you or his kids. I will say that you need to come up with some form of birth control because having abortions is not a good back up.
He is just as responsible for that child as you are....he had to be there for it to happen. The state will take care of money that he owes to help take care of that child.
As someone else already stated adoption is always an option. If you can get the father to sign over his rights then you could make another childless family very happy. (just tell him he won't have to pay anymore of his money) Then it would be better to wonder how that kid grew up rather than what he would have been like if he were still alive.
Good luck to you and if you want to talk email me.
2006-07-30 10:23:28 · answer #1 · answered by Miss Guided 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're asking what I would do, I would keep it.
However, I never would have had the first abortion (but I do support your choice to do so).
The thing is if it is something you know you will regret why put yourself through that? It can really mess up your psyche.
Like the others said, put it up for adoption.
But my mother-in-law raised 3 babies on her own since she was 21 (one of whom she got pregnant with through rape), and she has always said she wouldn't change a thing. Your situation does not sound as terrible as that, so I would think about giving your 3 yr old a new brother or sister.
And pick better men! If not for your own sake, for the sake of your child(ren). If this guy doesn't want to be with you when you are having his baby, I know you could see what kind of guy he was before you got pregnant, and you should have kissed his *** goodbye.
Also think about the pill and condoms! You are still young but you aren't so young that you don't know better. Sorry for the lecture, I just want you to understand what I am saying.
Good luck!
2006-07-30 12:08:01 · answer #2 · answered by Queen D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i hope that you really think before terminating this baby. it sounds like you made that choice before and you feel bad about it. yes it is hard to be a young single mother. i know from being there. i think that you should think about looking into adoption. yes alot of people will be willing and able to care for this child. and yes alot of adoptions do pay for the medical part while you are pregnant. i know that alot of people have told you to get on birth control, and i dont want to harp on another sister. but you should look into it. there are so many different kinds out there now days, that you dont even have to remember to take a pill anymore. you can be on it and no one even has to know it. go to the health department in your area, they can help with all the stuff that i talked about. good luck to you and your son, i know that you will make the best choice on what to do!!! children are a bleesing not a cures. i love my boys with all of my heart as i know that you do too!!! i will keep you in my prays!!!!
2006-07-30 10:58:03 · answer #3 · answered by kel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it was me, I wouldn't keep it. It sounds like you're struggling to take care of the first one. And, no offense, but it sounds like you're pretty fertile, so you should seriously either invest in birth control, or start being celibate. Also, it's understandable to be upset about terminating a pregnancy. I'm sure you could probably find a counselor to talk to. It would probably help.
2006-07-30 10:21:30 · answer #4 · answered by luckyirishgirl2004 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can either have an abortion (thee shall not kill) and regret it once again and miss out on all the wonderful things that you got to see with you 3 year old, or you can have the child and raise them to be strong and greatful and the other child can have a sibling to play with so that he or she won't be lonely. And you can put his behind on child support if he doesn't help you with the child. it's ok if he doesn't want anything to do with you it's the child you should be worried about forget him girl!!!!
2006-07-30 14:31:46 · answer #5 · answered by starlight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever considered adoption they can pay all of the expenses for you even move you and your son out of state till the baby is born.
2006-07-30 10:20:28 · answer #6 · answered by aintgivinup79 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What the f*ck kind of mother are you anyway? "Termination"... Wow. The father should have been locked in a mental institution if he hadn't kicked your *** to the curb.
2016-07-11 19:11:39 · answer #7 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's completely up to you. Have you considered adoption? Do you have like... an older sister who would be willing to take your child? Or a older friend?
2006-07-30 10:20:55 · answer #8 · answered by Ashley P 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want the baby, give it up for adoption to some family who does.
2006-07-30 17:44:25 · answer #9 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Abortion is a decision that is up to you. Before you decide to do that, please consider adoption. There are so many people who don't have kids but want them.
2006-07-30 10:24:10 · answer #10 · answered by Werecatwoman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋