how long should you be with someone that show controlling ways?

Question

when in a relationship and you have been in it for a while and your spouse is controlling how can you get out he wasnt always this way we been together for 4yrs.

Answer 1

That depends... Do you want to be controlled?
If not, try to take back some of your power and see what happens.

Answer 2

He was always this way, he just wasn't comfortable enough to show it before. Most likely he was raised this way. You have two choices, you can refuse to allow him to control you and insist that he seeks help for HIS problem or you can pack and leave. It won't get better on its own guaranteed but will probably get a whole lot worse. A lot of that is going to be about his attitude towards it, if he doesn't see a problem and is truly wharped enough to believe this is the way things should be you probably don't have much hope of fixing it. It is true, though, that you teach people how to treat you and he can only control you to the extent that you allow yourself to be controlled. Good luck to you!

Answer 3

This relationship is surely not going to work if he is controlling you. The best thing to do is leave. Cause it could get worse and you don't want to stick around and wait to see if things will change. Lots of women will do this and think things will change if i do this or that sometimes this is what they want and than they have you where they want you. Its just not a good position to be in. If you really want to try and work through things going to see a counseller might be a good thing to do. If he loves you he will do it for you. These relationships can be scary if he loves you he wouldn't do anything to hurt you. Just know that your the better person and leave. It may hurt but sometimes its for the best.

Answer 4

Get OUT of the relationship. Control freaks only get more controling as time goes on. Control freaks often become physically abusive.

Get OUT NOW!

Answer 5

I was in a controlling relationship for 5 years b4 i wised up and got out,and believe me that was way too long,dont stay a moment longer then it takes to pack and leave.

Answer 6

I was dating this disabled man that I met online. He was very controlling and very verbally abusive. He used to try to tell me when to call him. He calls me at a certain time. He called me names because I would be intimate with him. I learned early on that he is very controlling and used his diability as a means to get his way with people. So I got out early before the dating gets any further. Get out before its too late.

Answer 7

well if he was not like this from the begining then some thing has changed,i suggest comuincation,ask him why he does it?what he gets out of controlling you?,may be he doesn't see a problem till you tell him.but its not a healthy relationship if one partner controls the other.if you can't sort it out and his not willing to see the damage its causing theres no point carrying on.i wish you the best of luck.

Answer 8

find a way or get used to being controled,my wife had a control freak before she met me,she took what she could carry & got the hell out of there when he was gone.went to a friend in another state for a while then came home to her parents after awhile...

Answer 9

Maybe he thinks you like that. Sit him down and have a chat with him and tell him that it bothers you. And it really depends on what you mean by controlling. A simple chat could end the problem. Good Luck

Answer 10

I'm guessing no children yet. You need to talk about this or get out of it because this is something you definitely don't want to bring a child in the world with. He could become worse or turn abusive.