What would you do....?

Question

if a friend, family member or aquaintance said they were addicted to something, (alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling, internet, work)? Would you try to shelter them from some of the things you may be doing? Would you understand that it is our problem, not yours, and while you don't necessarily have to be blatant about what may be casual use for you, would you try to avoid us or the subject? Just trying to educate, just because we had a problem that we are dealing with, and I hope no one who is an addict will try to reform others just because they may use (although I know that there are varying degrees of health within our communities and some have not yet gotten the point that we only assist when asked to do so) anyway, any thoughts on the matter?

Excellent point GOSHAWK, addiction is a family illness, no matter who is doing the actual using everyone can be affected. And I did not mention that I am a grateful member of AA, and our AlAnon members strive for the same level of comfort as you seem to have dealt with. Peace.

Answer 1

I have dealt with addiction among family members. Unfortunately, no matter how much you want to help, it is the responsibility of the addicted individual to seek help. An addict cannot be cured unless they really want to kick the habit. No amount of taking, begging, or crying can force someone to change. There comes a point where the family and loved ones have to step back or be driven insane by the inability to make someone change. Forcing help when not wanted will only allienate you. There is a fine line between being there to help and not wanting to see further damage inflicted. Good luck.

Answer 2

I think any recovering addict will tell you there is nothing you can do or say to make them stop.

And there is nothing you can do or say to make them start.

Recovering is an "inside job."

You could certainly express your concern... and then, let it go. Don't expect results.

In the meantime, 12 step programs like al-a-non are very helpful for those who live with the addicted or are affected by them.

Good luck to you.

Answer 3

If the addiction is something that will ruin his/her entire lives (actually even next next lives if you believe in reincarnation), then you should help him/her out.
In fact one simple method i try that works is 'you pray' for the person. Somehow the power of unconscious works miraculously, in this case, i believe it's the power of mother universe.
One trivial deed could infect other areas of life.

Answer 4

well, it actually depends, at least for me. if i cared about this person and it effects them negatively, then i would help them. for example, if a friend i knew was fat from an addiction to chocolate, then i would help. but if the friend wasnt fat and addicted to chocolate, whats the point of helping him? anyways, its really up to you