Are there any other heavy people just not into the "pro-fat" rhetoric?

Question

"Chubby chaser?" "BBW?" "Meat on their bones" I find them more offensive then empowering.

I would never date a chubby chaser, because I don't like the idea of fetishizing my weight, and I certainly don't want someone to date for the one thing about me I'm working very hard to change!

Terms like "BBW" and "large and lovely" and "more to love" annoy me too, because it always sounds like they're trying to convince themselves more than anyone. I'm not "large and lovely." I'm "lovely-but-admittedly-a-little-large-and-working-on-it." You never hear anyone else say that.

The one that pisses me off the most: "Real men like curves." Since when did extra weight define being a woman? LISTEN TO ME, LADIES. There are thin women who are busty and curvy, just as there are bigger women who are not so curvy or well endowed. Curvature is NOT synonymous with weight! Please!

Do these things bother anyone else? Does not embracing my weight make me self-loathing?

Answer 1

It doesn't make you self-loathing at all. It makes you a realist who looks at things the way they are. I've been all over the scale in the course of my life from very skinny to overweight. While overweight, I never thought of myself as "large and lovely". Makes me cringe. I can look in the mirror and say, okay, I'm too fat, I have to loose some weight. That's it. End of story. and then it's up to me to do something about it.

Thing is though that not all women have that same mindset. Look at Richard Simmons and his soppy approach. He made millions by "feeling these womens' pain".

While I personally do not agree with the feel good approach to real life issues, I wouldn't argue against it because if it works for some women out there to raise their self-esteem to the point where they can find it within themselves to lose weight and get healthy, then more power to them, you know.

Answer 2

Yes,
These bother me too. Being too overweight is unhealthy for most of us and glamorizing it is not the way to make us feel better, IMO. You don't see people posting "anorexic and lovely" or "heavy smoker and lovely" because we know those are unhealthy lifestyles. What is lovely is health. And we should all strive for healthy, active, happy lives - no matter what size we are. Because of genetic and body type differences some of us will be thin, some curvy and some chubby, but by making healthy living our priority we will all be lovely.

Answer 3

Hey better to be fat and happy, then thin and miserable....Love yourself as you are, if you don't like the way you are change it if possible...Have a great day....