Pl provide me some help and tips to improve my situation.?

Question

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I would like to seek some help from people out there.I am a 26 old Male software engineer
working for an investment bank as a production support specialist.I work in shifts since
last two years.We all know shift work is not good for health.But my father does not care
he always forces me to work where i get more money.I am getting much better pay as i
work in singapore..than in India.but i have lost quite a bit of health..and peace of
mind and stability of Life..I always try to explain to my father..But he yells hard
at me and says "money is all" and even when once i went back to india...the first
question he asked me when i met him was "how much balance do you have in bank?"

I think all in my family...except my mother measure me by just the money i earn?
What should i do ? Afterall they are my family and i can not abandon/leave them
but it honestly hurts me...

Answer 1

Hello:
This answer is in response to your question posted on yahoo concerning your shift work and the pressures your father are placing on you.
First of all, if you are 26 years old, your father should not be telling you what to do in the first place, however I can understand that you "feel" as though you should listen to everything he says. But you don't. You are an adult now and can make decisions for yourself. You need to do what makes "YOU" happy rather than making others which includes your father happy.
If you don't take care of yourself, your health will continue to fail, especially your mental health.
I would sit down with your father, tell him that you are an adult and that you deserve the opportunity to do what makes you happy in life. Money does not bring happiness. If you are unhappy with your current situation, get out and try something else. Shift work, even though it probably brings in more $, is very bad on your sleep cycle which in turn will cause health and mental problems. It can lead to anxiety, depression, burn out, etc. Like I said you are an adult and you have to make decisions for yourself. It sounds like your father is very overbearing and has not realized that his son has turned into a man therefore he thinks in his mind that he still must make decisions for you. He can yell all he wants to, but you need to stand up for yourself. This is a situation I am all too familiar with as it happened to me although it was my mother rather than my father. At the age of 35 I finally had to lay it on the line, there was much yelling and hurt, but after a few months, she finally realized her son was an adult and she was doing more damage to my mental health than good.
I hope this helped answer your question and alleviate some of your concerns.
Regards and good luck!
Warren Shaffer, M.D.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

First of all I understand that you come from a different culture than I do. But you are 26 years old. You can and should do what you want to. But you need to understand that your family only wants the best for you. You need to make a plan for your life and then live it. Respect your family but live "your" life.

Answer 4

if your 26 why is your father still running your life, sounds to me like if you brake away from that your health might get better. If he owns the company go to work somewhere else.

Answer 5

maybe try working a job what it is easer and more money more info email