I have a 2 year old daughter but me and her dad fight a lot hes a butt head i wanted to be with him for ever but i dont think i can put up with his crap.
2006-07-29 17:39:43 · 15 answers · asked by Angel 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It is better for your daughter to be with parents that are not together but are not fighting either and are happier separately, than to live in the middle of an ongoing war. Would you like to be brought up in such an environment? It is also not good for you either. The stress level has got to be through the roof. Either get professional counseling so that your relationship settles down in the violence department (and verbal fighting is just as traumatic to a child as physical), or part ways and let him be with her (visitation rights). Best wishes.
2006-07-29 17:45:46 · answer #1 · answered by still learning at 56 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you find the right time to have a heart to heart talk with your bf and that's the time when both of you are coolheaded and willing to listen to each other, tell him about how you feel regarding your fights and tell him your concern about how these fights may affect your daughter's emotional growth.
If he really loves your daughter, your words may awaken that "sleeping" father's instinct in him and may make him realize that both of you should at least try not to have fights anymore.
However, if despite the fact that you talked to him about that and still he does not change, analyze which has more weight... your daughter's total welfare or your heart's desire. Your answer will show you the right way to the kind of life that you want to live with your daughter. Good luck.
2006-07-30 00:51:37 · answer #2 · answered by Ruzzo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
instead of fighting espesially around your daughter do this:
first don't pick a fight, if you have a problem approach him in a calm passive way when confronting him about it don't be angry just ask without blame or accusing just like you're having a regular conversation about something you seen or heard or something
if he approaches you with a problem calmly listen and if you're not really going to listen to the his problem just act like you are listening. look him in the eyes for three seconds every minute or so then you can just ignore him in your head if he's going on and on. if he doesn't get straight to the point of the argument just calmy ask him to tell you what he is upset over or however you want to put it, just don't be smart about it
address his problem calmly explain the what's and how's and who's and when's and where's calmy
and if you want to avoid the whole back and forth argument just listen to what he has to say without interrupting then when he;s done just bow out apologize and agree with him say i'll try to fix it
i felt that way to with mine that's what i started doing and we're so much better. by the way it ain't going to work all the time sometimes you just gotta argue but try
2006-07-30 01:00:41 · answer #3 · answered by nunu 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First your fragile daughter is getting hurt the most in this as this is the period her personaility is being formed, so get out and save your daughter from permanent damage but make sure if you have some control issues with your present boy friend you sort them out first, calmly and assertive, before you move out as otherwise you would have to face them again with your next boyfriend, also this would help you learn to make a better choice the next time, you deserve better.
2006-07-30 00:48:28 · answer #4 · answered by Abhishek Joshi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
continue to alllow him to be a part of his child's life. but u and him dont need 2 b involved in a boyfriend/girlfriend relashonship cuz ur child is very observant and ur child is taking all this in. when ur child grows up u dont want ur child fuss'n and fight'n with their partner do u? teach ur child the positive things in life - dont expose ur child to such a negative enviroment. ur child didnt ask for all this. so instead, give ur child the love that ur child does ask for. ithink the 2 of u will b better as just friends who will always share a child as a strong bond.
2006-07-30 00:48:34 · answer #5 · answered by BOSS 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you married to the guy? Why didn't you think about this before you had a child with him. Your child deserves better than this. Grow up and learn to think of someone besides yourselves. And I'm talking to your boyfriend to.
2006-07-30 00:43:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to figure out why you two fight and stop doing it. If you keep on, you will teach your girl that relationships are supposed to work that way. Do you want that for her? If you can't fix it, then you need to move on -- for your sake and hers.
2006-07-30 00:44:00 · answer #7 · answered by Otis F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then take your daughter and move out. Move in with your parents, another relative, or a close friend.
2006-07-30 00:42:51 · answer #8 · answered by jjc92787 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
2 words : Dump Him
2006-07-30 00:43:33 · answer #9 · answered by DirtyRavenCB47 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have no right to put up with that, you or him should go stay somewhere until you both cool off and are ready to work out the problems.
2006-07-30 00:42:15 · answer #10 · answered by LiLady_2U 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋