Wanna hear a good joke? After you read it, feel free to tell your own joke, ok?

Question

Four nuns tragically died in a semi crash. As they entered the gates to heaven, an angel approached them, holding a large bowl of Holy Water.
"Welcome," said the angel. "I understand you are strong female followers of the Lord, so if any of you have ever touched a male's private area, you must cleanse the part of the body you touched it with with this holy water."
The first nun came up and said, "Well, I touched one once with my finger, but I immediately realized it was wrong."
She dipped the tip of her finger in the water.
"I grabbed one, but it was sinful of me to do," said the second nun as she put her full hand in the water.
The third nun came up stuttering: "Well, I...well, actually, I..."
Then the fourth nun interrupted. "IF YOU EXPECT ME TO GARGLE THAT WATER AFTER THIS NUN DIPPED HER @SS IN IT, THEN YOU HAVE SOMETHING COMING TO YOU!!!

This joke is not meant to disrespect Anyone!

Answer 1

Hehe!

Answer 2

Heard that un; here's mine;
One day while my father and I were working on his boat that was sitting on a trailer in the yard, my nephew came over and was walking around the boat looking at every detail. Before long he was asking a lot of questions. I only recall one in particular. This boat had a galley in it complete with a sink and on the outside of the boat was a drain hole to allow waste water to go directly into the ocean. Now let me say I love this kid but he is a brick shy of a load His question was when told it was a sink hole. (are you ready?) Do you mean if the boat sinks that's where you get the water out? I swear this is a true story

http://www.total-knowledge.com/~willyblues/

Answer 3

This guy is about to get married and he is at the fiance's house. The only one there is her sister who is a hottie. The sis tells him "I just wanna **** you once before you marry my sister" She goes up the stairs shaken her thing and tossing bras and panties down the stairs. The guy stand there dumb struck. Finally he throws up his hands and walks out the door. Waiting by his car are the parents. Dad gives a pat on the back "congratulations son you passed our test you will make a fine husband for our girl" The moral of the story??? Always keep your condoms in the car!!!!!!

This is the only other joke I can remember.

What do women and hurricanes have in common?
They both scream when they c*m and take the house when they leave

Answer 4

Hahaha. Great stuff Try this one;
A woman was in a long term coma and had been for about a year and a half. Her husband visited her everyday and got to know all of the staff quite well.
One day one of the nurses was giving the comatose wife a bedbath.When she got to cleaning "down there" she noticed with great surprise that the woman made a bit of noise and seemed to stir slightly every time she was touched. Stunned by what this could mean she phoned the husband up and explained what had happened, suggestng that next time he was in he may want to try oral sex in order to wake his wife up.
The husband agreed and immediately came down; the nursing staff gave he and his wife some privacy and went about thei business. About ten minutes later an alarm sounds. All staff rush to the source of the alarm; this room with the husband and wife only to find the comatose wife, instead of being revived was flatlining. Despite all attempts to save her the wife dies. Distraught the nurse whose idea it was turns to the husband and says "What happened? Did you try the oral sex?"
"Yes."Came his reply. "I think she might have choked, though"

Answer 5

That's a good one. Here is another nun joke:


The Nun teaching church school was speaking to
her class one Sunday morning and she asked the question,
"When you die and go to heaven... which part of your body goes first?"

Mary raised her hand and said, "I think it's
your hands."

"Why do you think it's your hands"? Mary
replied, "...Because when you pray, you hold
your hands together in front of you and God
just takes your hands first!"

"Oh what a wonderful answer!" the Nun said.

Little Johnny raised his hand and said, "Sister, I think it's your legs."

The Nun looked at him with the strangest look on her face.
"Now, Little Johnny, why do you think it would be your legs?"

Little Johnny said, "Well, I walked into Mommy and
Daddy's bedroom the other night, Mommy had her
legs straight up in the air and she was screaming,
"O God, I'm coming!"
If Daddy hadn't had her pinned down, we'd have lost her."

The Nun fainted.

Answer 6

that was good. heres one

One day the priest calls his three best nuns in and tells them that they have been so good that they get a day off to do what ever they want.So the next day the priest calls them back in to see what they did.so the first nun goes I slept with a man and the priest says go drink some holy water and god will forgive you.So she goes and drinks the holy water.the second nun says I robbed a bank and the priest says go drink some holy water and god will forgive you.So she goes and drinks some holy water.Then the third one comes in and the priest asks her what she did and she said i peed in the holy water.

Answer 7

good one. i got one for ya

3 guys have been stranded in the desert for a month, an italian, a german & a pollock. the italian guy finds a lamp buried in the sand. he rubs it and a genie appears. he says that he'll grant each of the men a wish. the italian guy says, i wanna be home with my family, eating pasta. poof, he's gone. the german says, i wanna be at oktoberfest, drinking with my friends. poof, he's gone. the polish guy says.... i'm pretty lonely, i want my friends back.

Answer 8

NIce. Mines funnier...at least I think it is:

Two kids are in Sunday School. A girl who keeps falling asleep sits next to a boy with his pen out.
The teacher asks, "Who created heaven and earth?" The boy pokes the girl in the side with his pen.
"God almighty!" yells the girl.
"Very good!" says the teacher. The girl starts to snooze off again.
The teacher asks, "Who died for our sins?" The boy pokes her with his pen again.
"Jesus Christ!" yelled the girl.
"Very good." The girl goes off to sleep again.
The teacher asks, "What did Eve say to Adam after having their 26th kid?" The boy pokes her with the pen again.
The girl yells, "If you put that thing into me one more time, I swear I'll break it in half!"
The teacher fainted.

Answer 9

Thats funny. Okay, two peanuts were walking down the street and one was assulted.

A SALTED.

Answer 10

What is red and cowering in a corner???

A baby with a razor blade


Just wanted to make sure I reserve my spot in hell!

Answer 11

Heard it, one of the classics. Keep up the good work, brother.