need answer now...How can i handle the situation? Accompany friend to go check up with the doctor...?

Question

My boyfriend was diagnosed with brain tumor 2-3 years ago. He stops taking any medicine and treatment after he thinks he has okay. But, for the past few months, his head feel sick again. It’s just like before, when he was sick. Now, he did not take any medicine because if he did, he easily forgetting many things. Nobody knows about this even his family and friends except me. But, thanks to god, I succeed to persuade him to seeing the doctor. today,now, i want to accompany him to do check up with the doctor. I just want to know what I should do, should I go with him to the doctor's room or waiting outside. What should i say if the results are bad? How can i tell his mother about his illness? (His family doesn't know about that).what the doctor will do?

if he must stay in ward tomorrow, I’m the one who must tell his family. That’s our promise..
i do need some support now..

Answer 1

As far as going to the doctor with him, ask him when you get there if you can go in with him. If he says no, it's his decision and you must respect it. As far as telling the family, that's a tougher issue. What's the reason he didn't tell his folks? Are you sure he hasn't already and they haven't said anything?

Answer 2

Your friend is blessed to have you, and you are in a very sensitive position, i would go with him and then do your best to let the doctor or nurse know that his parents do not know of this illness, and you are his only support system,, i am so sorry for your pain and his,
You must let his family know, especially if they are close and loving, why he shut them out who knows? I do believe that you are very special and will stick by him, nomatter what, even if he makes it difficult, don't abandon him..

The responsibility, is tremendous, that you are in charge of , and appointed yourself of because of your love for him, there is a lesson in this for you, and him and all involved, even us who read your postings, and even us who might be faced with something similar,,

I just lost a new friend, who was depressed, ill and confused, he was too young to die way too young, yet he was afraid to face life, and the stresses that he was facing, and a few days ago he took his own life, i am so sad, keep thinking what else could i do, i only met him weeks ago, and he gave me his "tortoise" and was looking for a home for his dogs, and he had cut himself off from society most of his life due to his Religion, and a domminant mother, anyway, he is gone, and i am sad that he died alone, what couyld be worse?

Regarding you, pray together, pray for guidence, and i will also pray for you as i am right this minute, but please don't give up and do not let him give up, just focus on what you want, not what you don't want,
you might even ask a coounselor, or a person from a church you feel comfortable with.

Good luck ,

Answer 3

Go in to the doctor's exam room with your friend. He is going to need you for support, be it good news or bad. His doctor may be willing to help in explaining the situation to his family. Set up a family consultation appointment with the doctor and allow him to answer the difficult questions that his family may have as well as recommendations for treatment.
You sound like a true and loyal person and your friend is fortunate to have an advocate like you. You have some difficult issues to deal with, as does your friend. Pray to God for wisdom, guidance and healing. God Bless You!

Answer 4

Your friend is certainly in need of support and I hope you will be there if he wants you to be. Let it be his decision whether you go with him into the examination room. If he receives bad news, the best you can do is to tell him you will be there for him for whatever he needs. If you have promised that you will tell his family if the news is not good, then ask God to help give you the courage and the words to use. And remember that Jesus is the GREAT PHYSICIAN and no one dies until God is willing. Good luck to your friend and to you for being his friend.

Answer 5

Oh my honey, I feel for you right now. You've got a lot of weight on your shoulders. Probably the best thing to do is really talk to your boyfriend about your specific questions, such as how you should tell his family, he'll know better than anyone. If he won't talk to you about it, do what your heart tells you. If it was me, I would be in the room with him, talking to the doctor, asking the doctor all kinds of questions, to find out as much as I could about what to expect. Good luck.

Answer 6

You have a really tough job and must love your boyfriend an awful lot to allow him to take the cowardly route of not telling his family himself.

I hope your relationship with his family is good. Tell them that your boyfriend didn't want to burden his family with his condition and that he thought he could pull through without any support but he has found out that he now needs everyone's love, support and prayers.

May God bless you, your boyfriend and his family and give you strength to get through this ordeal.

Answer 7

U need 2 stay with him. He really needs ur help now. If he can't count on u, then, who can he count on? Ur his girlfriend, and u need 2 let him know that ur there 4 him.U said his family doesn't even know so, go in the room with him, and everything will b okay. God Bless.

P.S. I hope I helped out alot.

Answer 8

Wow , what a hard time you are having. That sure is alot to deal with alone. I would tell his parents, yours , or a good friend or two, you both need support .

If you don't feel comfortable telling his parents, let his Dr. tell them.

I really hope your boyfriend is O.K.!!

Answer 9

I know you are lying, because, there is no way his close family doesn't know about his illness. They do know. And you know they know. And if the results are bad, just do what you've been doing.

Answer 10

you no what u shouldnt listen to what every body else says just follow ur heart and do what eva u think is right.