Should a biological father that owes $15,000 in child support be allowed to visit his child??

Question

He's making payments, but only started three months ago, and he's had contact with his daughter for the past two years, but her mother refuses to let the girl visit him. Is she wrong? I'm afraid she's going to cause herself a lot of future pain by keeping them away from each other. I think when the daughter is older, she is going to resent her mother for this action. Don't get me wrong, the dad made a huge mistake not paying support, but if he is making an effort now, and pretty consistant with two years of phone calls, emails and cards, shouldn't he get another chance? Or did he miss the boat a long time ago?

Answer 1

child support and visitation are two seperate issues! i would suggest that "he" go to the friend of the court and file a complaint in regards to "DENIAL OF VISITATION". there is a special form for that. if "he" has been consistant in coming...or trying to get his daughter the child's mother can be forced to give him "make up time" (he needs to request that in writing on the complaint form SPECIFICALY!) if he has been denied visitation for 6 consecutive weekends, put in writing that in ADDITION to his next 6 regular visits that he would like to have an additional 6 weekends to make up for what she has taken. ALSO PUT IN WRITING that the denial of visitation is effecting the father/daughter relationship...

i know you don't realize it BUT, if you file a complaint based on this issue IF YOU ARE SPECIFIC about how much time you have been denied and then you ASK THE COURT to compensate the time you've lost with make up time equal to the amount lost (meaning that you are asking for damages) AND one of the 12 steps to custody includes that one parent is not to do anything to hinder the relationship between the child & the other parent. IF YOU FOLLOW MY GUIDELINES you will win!

keep paying on the arrearages (back child support) and keep going to get your daughter.

BEST of luck to you and your family!

Answer 2

Well, Well, pull up a chair ! I went through the same thing. In my opinion : If your child is a minor, don"t do it. At least you have peace of mind that you made the choice for them. If the young child entering the late teen age; I would say that they can make there choice. Listen ! I went through the same situation. And believe me if I had chosen a different choice I would have. My son's biological father decided that he did not want to be a father after I was 8 months pregnant. O.K. so let it be I was 23 years of age at the time. Did "everything" by myself doctors vists paying doctors, hospital fees etc. I didn't depend on anybody. NOT E VEN THE GOVERMENT ! Well to make the long story short: "This certain person came into my son"s life at the age of 10 years old. He promise many promises I guess you can call in a kiss and a promise. Well, I gave in and my son met his biological father. It lasted like 2 years . He said that he could not handle the father figure any more. Well, in between he and I had a good communication going , so I thought. He made so many promises that I don't have enough fingers nor toes to count on. I even stopped the child support be cause I thought he was so true. Well, BAM he said he was not ready to be a father. I messed my son up so much ! ! I had my son in counseling etc. Well, Hip Hip Heray ! The #$% *( ! ***** died this past march. My son , I know that it does bother him but what can we do ? He is 23 years of age now. Oh I should let you know That m son does have a wonderful step father. Sent from heaven.

Answer 3

Well has he had previous contact with his daughter? Is there court ordered vistiation rights?

Child support and vistitation are two different things. If the guy hasn't made an effort to be a part of his childs life before than what gives him the right to stroll in now and decide to be a dad? He helped make that baby he should be paying child support no matter what. But if he has been a deadbeat dad up till now I wouldn't let him see her. He will just upset her in the long run..

Children should be treated like children, not bills.

Answer 4

There is no easy answer to this question. He should of paid his child support. But a child needs both a mother and a father and she should be allowed to see him. The mother is punishing her own child far more than she is punishing the father. In the long run the child will wind up resenting this course of action.Every one deserves a second chance. If he is truly a schmuck, like the mother thinks he is Im sure, then the child should be able to find that out for herself. My dad left when I was 5 and never paid a dime. My mother let me go with him when he wanted me. I figured out what he was all about on my own. I havent seen him for 7 years.

Answer 5

Phone calls, emails, and birthday cards do not make up for doctor bills, clothes, food, shelter, school supplies, and the list just goes on and on. No, if he can't take care of his responsibilities as a father he has no right to see his child. I'm siding with the mom on this one, I'd tell her to stick to her guns. If he honestly wants to be a part of his child's life he needs to first show consistency in his child support payments as well as the fun stuff, that's what makes a parent. Anyone can send a birthday card.

Answer 6

A daughter needs her father no matter how many mistakes he has made. It is not about the relationship between the parents which obviously is not amicable. It is about the girl and what is right for her. If the girl chooses not to see her father, then okay. But if that choice is based on being close to her jaded mother it will eventually turn on her as the daughter ages and becomes a mother herself.

Answer 7

I have a father who owes me 18,000 in child support and if he wants to see the kid he can. he will still owe me the money regardless. This guy sounds like he wants to be part of her life, maybe the momma just believes that visitation and money go hand in hand which is not the case. How will she explain when the child gets older she wouldn't let her daddy see her becasue he didnt have no money. No a good choice for her.

Answer 8

My own experience and that of other adults that went through that situation as children are: the ones kept from the parent for whatever reason are hurting and angry about what could've been. I suggest let him in and out as he so desires unless he begins taking advantage and breaking promises to the child causing distress and pain. If he doesn't use the privilege or opportunity he looses it. Money is not an equivilant to the bonding and love between parent and child. Tell the child about the tender feelings that brought him/her into existance. I told the judge, I stopped believing in my husband, and so did his boys. They love him and have liberal access to him as they choose, but they choose not to be hurt and disapointed any longer. And thay hold no malice towards me.

Answer 9

Financial problems shouldn't make it right to keep them apart. For god sake, people need to get over that kinda stuff and act like adults. Using the child as a way of getting back at him for not paying isn't going to solve his money issue. But the child will see the parents true colors when she gets older.

Answer 10

Sounds like the child needs a court appointed advocate. I dont know your roll in all of this but it sounds like Mom is fearful and angry...and perhaps she can make a point for supervised visitation if he has not really had much physical contact with her....

It really is all about what is in the best interest of the CHILD not the parents.