I have a guest list of 165 .. and I want to invite 65 of those people to the ceremony only. How would I word that in the invitations? And what would I say when they find out about the reception? Is it too rude to do that?
2006-07-28 12:00:06 · 14 answers · asked by heids1419 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
The easiest way to do this is make up 100 Reception cards that will go in the envelopes for those you want to invite to the reception. That way you can have one invitation for everyone and then only those you want to invite to the reception will be invited by way of having the Reception invites. My best friend did something similar for her wedding. She had a tea after the ceremony where a small cake that she made was served and then that evening certain people were invited back to their house for the big party. You could do something similar yourself and you could word the Reception card so that those that receive know it is a secret of sorts (i.e. Private Reception, 6pm, Holiday Inn). That way, everyone thinks you are having the tea (or whatever you choose) as a reception instead of having a sit down dinner.
2006-07-28 12:43:04 · answer #1 · answered by Patricia D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I personally think that inviting them to the ceremony and not the reception is terribly rude. How would you feel if you sat through someone's wedding and spent your good money on a gift, only to find out later that they didn't even appreciate that enough to invite you to the reception?
And they'll probably show up at the reception anyway, after hearing about it from the other guests and assuming that their reception card was accidentally left out. And then you'll be short on food and probably space.
It would be okay to do the other way, though. For example, invite only 40 to the ceremony and the 40 plus your other 100 friends to the reception.
You'll either have to cut your guest list, scale back some of the less important things and ivite everyone to the reception, or fork over the extra cash for the 65 others.
2006-07-28 18:16:02 · answer #2 · answered by Queen Queso 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, that is extremely rude. If you can't afford to have everyone come to the reception then you need to scale back the reception, like only serve cake and punch, or just finger food, or just pastire, tea and coffee-- there is no shame in holding a non-meal reception as long as you do it at a non-meal time of day.
People CAN do it the opposite way around-- have the small group for the ceremony and a larger group invited to the reception-- that's OK.
But what you are asking about is just NOT done-- it would be very rude.
2006-07-29 16:23:53 · answer #3 · answered by Etiquette Gal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tacky & rude!!
If you can't invite everyone to the reception, cut the guest list, scale back the reception to just cocktails and appetizers, or no reception at all. Your friends and family that are not invited to either will be more understanding (if you're honest with them-) than the ones that felt they were left out from the reception.
If finances are the reason, have just a ceremony for now and hold a family and friends "picnic bash" to celebrate later on. You might even convince them to bring their own food & beverage!
2006-07-28 13:33:54 · answer #4 · answered by jess_offramp 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whats below I just pulled off one of the wedding ettiquette web-sites. You can do as you are talking about. But dont be surprised if you get some people who are upset. And you may get some who thing that they are invited to the reception as well. And this will not work if you reception and wedding are in the same location.
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Wedding etiquette provides three invitation options.
Use combination wedding/reception invitation if your events are at the same place and all guests are invited to both. The phrase "reception immediately following the ceremony" typically appears on this invitation.
Order separate wedding invitations if your reception will follow at another location or many guests are invited to only the ceremony. A reception card inserted into the primary envelope invites guests to the reception.
A reception invitation is appropriate when only family and close friends are invited to the wedding. In this case, a separate card invites guests to the service and to the reception
2006-07-28 12:27:13 · answer #5 · answered by coldfirene 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My finance and I are getting married in Jamaica so we are having a small wedding and reception there, but when we comes back to the States we are going to have a huge reception for the people that we didn't invite to the wedding. So I don't think that it's rude, what we are doing is having two different invitations made. One for the 40 guest in Jamaica; and the other for the the reception here. B/c we are making our own invitations it's really not expensive... Just a thought
2006-07-28 12:21:19 · answer #6 · answered by Ms. Hot Chocolate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Place on the invitiations the wedding information only. You can include reception information in the invitaions of only those you want. NO it is not rude, just keep your invitiations about the ceremony and where it will be, and for those invited to the reception include the separate reception information card with an RSVP phone number, or return card. Most people do not include everyone at the reception because of the cost, and it is totally acceptable.
2006-07-28 13:45:37 · answer #7 · answered by thedothanbelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some invitations are for the ceremony and reception
Others are inviting to a wedding reception for ...
2006-07-28 13:16:33 · answer #8 · answered by kpizura 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no way to do that politely. Of course they will find out about the reception. You will just have to scale back the guest list altogether, or plan a less expensive reception.
2006-07-28 12:13:55 · answer #9 · answered by Tiss 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there's no way to just invite 65 people to the wedding. without the onther's finding out you did that.If you only want 65 people to come.then just invite the 65 people that you want to the wedding. But if you want all 165 there then cute back on some stuff for the wedding so that all of them can come.good luck
2006-07-28 13:21:57 · answer #10 · answered by Angel sent from heaven 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋