i am 17 years old i have a 3 yaer old daughter that crys alot..?

Question

okay here is the thing i have a 3 year old daughter that crys alot i dont know what is wrong with her she use to never cry at all..when she crys i try to help her i give her things and everything i dont spank her or anything do you all think that i should? i feel like a bad mommy if i spank her but she is kinda getting outta hand some times she is around me 24/7 i meen to do u think she is around me to much and just dont like me he he anymore?

Answer 1

Little ones do that. There is nothing wrong with a corrective spanking, but not for crying, if she is crying for no reason and pouting try time outs, over and over again, also you may try putting her down for a nap or rocking her to sleep. I used to think my kids were total brats and I was a failure as a dad until they just fell right a sleep. 3 year olds need a lot of sleep. Save spankings for direct defiance or dangerous situations, not when when there losing it, this is where time out comes in.
Best of luck to you

Answer 2

It sounds like she may be going through a terrible two stage. My daughter will be 4 in October and she never had the terrible twos. She had the terrible threes! It was dreadful. She cried and threw fits about everything and it didn't matter what I did. I tried spanking the fire out of her and being really nice but neither worked. It's just a phase that she will get over so the best advice I can give is to be patient. You are good not to spank or hit. Just love her, still keep your limits and don't let her cross the line with you (that makes her know you are the boss) and ignore her when she cries. My girl didn't outgrow it for 7 months, but she will, so just be patient.
Just a side note: Make sure she' not crying because she's tired or because someone is hurting her you don't know about. Also, keep in mind if there have been changes in her life, a new bed, a new friend, a new school, this might cause her to be weepy, too.

Answer 3

I have a daughter that is now 9 and she has adhd and obsessive copulsive disorder and she gets that way at times. Try this and see how it works but it will take time to change totally. I even heard the other day it takes atleast 21 days to change a childs behavior.



try this,

gradually leave your daughter with someone you can trust and gradually add more time and this will help with seperation anxiety.

And try to set a routime and maybe even get her to help with a few easy chores like vacuum and so on.
Don't give in no matter how hard it is and it is very hard at times to not give in but she needs to learn that she can't always have her way. If you have to put her on a chair and give her a time out for 3 minutes, and if she gets up put her right back there and start the timer over and repeat as necessary.

But also make sure that you tell her what she is doing that is unexceptable and that she understand.

make a chart or reward program for her and everytime you check in on her playing on her own and doing something good give her lots of praise and tell her why you are so happy with her, and I was told check on her every 15 min or so and gradually longer. and after she earns enoupgh points, she would gain a prize special privelege etc. It works for my daughter.

I also will at times put her in her room, and while she is still having a tantrum I will grab a book and start reading outloud and about 2 pages later she is actually reading to me (her choice) and then about 10 minutes later she is sleeping or calmed down. I will also just sit and start a discussion about bad behavior and sometimes other issues and soon she is acting appropriately.

Don't always respond when she crys unless she is really hurt or in trouble.

Answer 4

I am sorry that so many people answering you are being so rude and critical. People have babies that is life. I am glad at such a young age you took the responsiblity of your actions and decided to raise your daughter instead of taking the easy way out. I think you should have your daughter checked by a professional and if all is fine with her physically then address her mental state. Has something changed in her enviroment recently? Can she speak to you? If so talk to her allow her to express herself - sometimes if children are not able to emotionally express themselves the way they want to they will instead cry or have tantrums. I am sure you know your daughter best and yes of course she loves you. You are her everything her world. Good luck and of course try and have a friend or family member care for her even for just an hour or two a week so you can have some much needed free time. It does help to get away - even just for a walk around the block.

Answer 5

Honestly I think it is probably just the opposite. I think she is probably doing this for more attention. Pretty much all three year old cry and it's a phase that most of them grow out of. For most three year old simply ignoring it works. If they seem to be smart enough to sit down and talk with them try that as well. There is also time outs and time ins. Time outs you of course find a corner or a bedroom where she can finish crying. A time in is a distraction, time with just you, find one of her toys and start playing with it, she should stop crying and join the fun.

My daughter the only thing that worked was throwing the fit with her, and I mean i would throw myself on the floor kick and scream with her. I know it sounds funny but she was so confused she stopped and tried to consol me. I only had to do it twice before her fits stopped.

I do agree with you on spanking though especially don't spank for crying, that just doesn't make sense.

Answer 6

You have to determine a few things.
Is she crying because she isn't getting what she wants? Or is she just crying?
Are you screaming or yelling or are you tense? Are you crying all the time?
Is there anyone else in your household who is treating her badly? Who is screaming, yelling etc?
Kids will experience the terrible two which will go into their 3's if not address. If it's just a case of not getting their way taking away priveleges and spanking need to occur however if you are yelling and screaming a disciplining in anger this will make things worse. The child needs discipline when they are knowingly being definant, slapping when being gotten on to or talking to you in disrespect.
If you are crying all the time or yelling and screaming the child does not feel stable and will do the same. If you are doing this you need to seek help for depression or parenting classes to help you.
If someone else in your home is doing this you need to discuss this.
If you are unsure of all this, have someone you trust who is level headed come into your home and observe your family. Ask them to be honest and evaluate what the problem is.
Also, there could be a medical problem. If it is none of the above or if you note anything else medically see a physician.

Answer 7

Being a teen mom is very hard. I had my first child at 15. Maybe you can look into getting her into head-start or some kind of mommy's day out program through your church. That way you could have a little time to refresh yourself its hard being a mommy at any age, but before you know it she will be all grown up so enjoy the closeness while you can. Hang in ther don't listen to all those people who are being rude it sounds like you love your daughter. Keep up the good work!

Answer 8

So this means you were 14 when you had her. What are you doing with a 3 year old? I was 30 when I had my child, and I wasn't ready to be a parent, but I sure wouldn't have been ready at the age of 14. My daughter is your age, and she's NEVER been with a boy. (Not that way) I don't understand teens today.

Answer 9

What I told my son when he tried that is the negative behavior does not get my attention and if he wants my attention he should come over and give me a hug. But if he continues to cry for my attention he will get sent to his room. I only had to send him to his room twice. But you must be firm about it.

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I also feel bad for those that feel the need to put you down for having a child. Isn't your child just the most beautiful little girl in the world? I'm sure she is!! Don't let these people get to you. They tend to forget that just 100 years ago having a kid the age you had your child was common place. Jeesh, at 32 I would probably be a grandma!!!

Answer 10

i'm glad you don't want to spank her and you must never spank her. never. it is harmful, it is abusive, it lowers the iq, and it doesn't work.

okay, now, why would you spank her because she's crying?

she is supposed to be around you 24/7. that is normal for human development. you are supposed to spend 15 minutes every hour engaged in activities that interest her, learning about her, teaching her through your example, while you learn about the world through her eyes.

if your child is crying, she is telling you something. if not that she is sick, then that she needs something. it's way past time you learned how to figure our what she needs or help her figure out how to express what she needs.

get to it - her mental health is in your hands.