I'm currently pregnant by ex, we broke up two weeks ago. I explained to him that I was pregnant and he agreed to be there for me. The problem is he moved back to home state to be closer to his children and now I'm pregnant. It is not an option for me to relocate. The thing is I feel that me and my child especially my child will be getting the short end of the stick in regards to knowing his or her father. I know I sound selfish, but honestly I'm not that is the reason I agreed to end the relationship so he could be closer to his children. I think I just furstrated and hurt right now. Any advice on how I should explain my feelings to him. He has two children already 9 & 12.
2006-07-28 06:04:30 · 6 answers · asked by Kenya 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
He didn't leave the other children they never lived with him, but with their mother and he pays child support monthly. We dated for almost two years long distnace before he relocated to be with me.
2006-07-28 06:11:38 · update #1
The same way you espress yourself here should be the way you express yourself to him. Be open, honest & upfront with the situation. If you are thinking about not keeping the child this should not be a reason!! If you are a good person & have family & friends around you that will support you than you can raise the baby to be a good individual. If it is a matter of child support and your are not sure that you ex will help financial there is child support. And they will help even if you live in different states. As far as visiting you can always do that and he can travel as well. Think about it, he didn't make you who you are today you got there on your own and with your family's & friends help. And those people will be the ones who help your child become who he/she will be. There are father figures all around you. There are good people all around you.
2006-07-28 06:07:54 · answer #1 · answered by Just Asking?!?! 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Explain to him exactly what you just told us...that the only reason you broke it off is because relocating presented too many difficulties for you. Tell him you respect and honor his need to be near his other children, and how can you work out a compromise? Tell him it is important to you that he be an active participant in this child's life. What can you do? Then see what he can come up with...it's a beginning.
2006-07-28 13:10:34 · answer #2 · answered by riverhawthorne 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just do what you have to do. It's pretty obvious that he's not going to be all that responsible if he's left two kids before. Make sure he pays child support and take the maximum. Don't do it for selfish reasons. Do it for the child and only the child. Make sure that is the ONLY reason. If he's going to be a hot head over anything make sure you stay stable and steadfast coz it'll come back on him one day when that kid learns how to talk and understand. Trust me, my mother walked out on us repeatedly.
2006-07-28 13:09:28 · answer #3 · answered by jozlyn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not necessary for the father to be around to have a good enviroment for the child. As long as there is love and guidance the child will grow just fine. As for finances, if your ex is true to his word about helping you then that is good. It would be better if you do for yourself and anything he gives you would be extra.Good luck.
2006-07-28 13:20:26 · answer #4 · answered by barondmarrone 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fool girl! You got into a relationship with him knowing all you did. He is gone now. That's the facts. You are on your own. Deal with it.
Make plans that do not include him. He was just the sperm donor! You get to be everything else.
2006-07-28 13:08:22 · answer #5 · answered by unchainmenow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be very hurt, too. His other children should be able to know their father, too. I would tell him if he loves and cares not just for some of his children but all of them, he will make arrangements to see all his children.
2006-07-28 13:12:15 · answer #6 · answered by mamato5Boys 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋