Me and my husband have been married 2 years and I've known my step daughter ever since before she was walking and now she will be 4 in Nov. and I try my hardness to play with her and spend time with her but she is rejecting me and I don't know why?
2006-07-28 06:01:24 · 19 answers · asked by wife&mommy 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
She doesn't hate you. She is confused. She is trying to figure out this world. Make sure that she has things she ( and only she) does with her daddy. I have a stepson that will be 5 in January. Feel free to contact me to talk more if you want.
2006-07-28 06:40:26 · answer #1 · answered by led321 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Either she simply doesn't like you w/out reason (she's 4) or she feels you take time from daddy or the mom could be encouraging her behavior. When I got married I was 19yrs & 3 weeks old, he was 35 yrs (dont' ask) and had 13, 14 & 15 yr old sons. The oldest 2 were nice, polite, good kids & we always got along great. The youngest was a whiny, selfish brat! He even refused to come to MY wedding if his MOM wasn't invited. So his fat a$$ stayed home! I did my best for years & it was never good enough. I'm over it!
2006-07-28 13:14:54 · answer #2 · answered by scarlet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't say what she is doing to "reject" you. Do you have custody or only see her on weekends? She may be having a hard time with staying close to you if she has to go back and forth. If so, you cannot know what is going on when she is not with you. When she is with you, be consistent, accepting, and firm in showing her affection as well as setting limits. She will learn to feel secure and get to know you for who you are as she grows. Do the best you can to be united with your husband. If he is respectful of you and you both maintain a "united front" she will respond well in time. Good luck!
2006-07-28 13:13:45 · answer #3 · answered by Helpful Kim 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a step mom and i really resented her for a long time cause i felt as if she was the one who took away my happy family like you know he went with her instead of me and my mom. If the mom is like mine was then she may be filling her head with bad things saying you stole her daddy away and at 4 she can really start understanding these things now. I eventually had to realize that she was not a bad person and things just happen but it took me a long time. You need to discuss this with you hubby maybe he can talk to the mom and ask her if there is anything going on at home you need to be aware of, she could be reacting to something going on in moms home. But in all reality her mom is probably bad mouthing you and she is old enough now to get what is goin on. Goos luck.
2006-07-28 14:09:36 · answer #4 · answered by life as we know it 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, but she's only 4. You're the adult. Is she being told NOT to like you when she is with her biological mom? Maybe it's time for a family "sit down" with the biological mom to discuss maybe what's happening with her.
You will be in very close contact with the biological mom since you are married to the child's father. And conversations, discussions, "pow-wows" are going to be absolutely essential if you want that child to feel loved, secure, and stable in both homes.
Everybody swallow their pride---and all those awful names you have ready to call each other-----*GULP*-----and do what's best for the child's happiness and wellbeing.
2006-07-28 13:06:52 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ALL kids do this. Its probalby worse because she is a girl. Eventually she will get over it. Try not to take it personal. She is just 4 yrs old ya know. Just find something you guys can do TOGETHER that is fun for her too. She can't hate you forever. Good Luck
2006-07-28 13:15:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am recently married and for awhile I thought my 3 year old step daughter hated me to. And I would always bacially kiss her *** to be her friend and wait on her hand and foot and just spoil her to get her to like me... then I got to thinking you know what I had enough.... When she is in this home, she will respect me and act like a big girl and listen to me. I just put my foot down and let her know who boss is, then everytime she is good I tell her and give her huggs and tell what a big girl she is and spend time with her. It took several weeks to ger her to understand me and me to understand her. But know everytime she is here she respects me and know to act good and she knows she cant get away with spoiledness here. She has matured alot. And ya at first it was hard to deal with her cause she was so spoiled... but after spending several weeks with her and us getting to know eachother and me putting my foot down and setting limits but also making sure she knows she is loved and cared for.. we finally connect and we get along great. She still has her moments but she and I finally understand eachother. And I love her soo much. Shes a great little girl! Just took a little bit of disopline and letting her know who is boss and making sure she is loved too.
2006-07-28 18:24:39 · answer #7 · answered by Piper 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
may b she hates u.when she rejects something u tell her then just beat her.mayb this will produce some love in her heart of hers 4 u.or just send her 2 some nursing schools.
2006-07-28 13:21:27 · answer #8 · answered by Justine H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firstly, she doesn't hate you. She might be jealous of something. Maybe your husband needs to spend some quality time with her. Just him and her. She might be jealous of the attention he gives you.
2006-07-28 13:06:16 · answer #9 · answered by someone_unperfect 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My stepkids mother tells them to not talk to me at all, and mess up my house when they come here to visit. She also tells them to snoop around and steal. They stole my son's Polar Express movie and some of my jewelry.
2006-07-28 20:48:58 · answer #10 · answered by sexymama 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋