This person won't listen to me and I'm ready to give up. I need them to realize that my thoughts and feelings are 100% real. Anger doesn't work neither does crying or pretending nothing matters. Any advice on saving this friendship?
2006-07-28 02:25:11 · 14 answers · asked by keekle 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Think about yourself ,, what are you feeling... why are you hurting yourself..
why are you attached to this person..
why do you think you are right..
concentrate on yourself instead of concentrating on the other person..
what thoughts make you suffer..
do you need to suffer..
why do you think other person should listen to you..
let yourself detached from the situation and look from far..
look from above of your body..
what is this body and mind of yours so involved in this currently..
will this last long..
why do you think you are so important for this person.
why do you think you are so important yourself..
why do you think there is you and this person and there exist a thing called friendship..
think about tomorrow
think about yesterday.
is this person here when you were born.
will it be there when you die..
2006-07-28 02:34:28 · answer #1 · answered by fedup 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your thoughts and feelings ARE real. Whether someone else recognizes/respects them or not. That doesn't mean that your thoughts and feelings match perfectly with everyone elses reality- their perceptions of the events.
You CAN NOT MAKE them think what you want, understand what you feel, listen to you. Can't be done. Don't spend time or anguish there.
You can learn ACTIVE LISTENING - a way of clarifying communication to prevent misunderstanding and to reduce hurt feelings. If you learn this ( and your friend is willing to learn it) things might get a LOT better. But no guarantees.
For more info on ACTIVE LISTENING, start with
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Active_listening
BTW, you might think that active listening just means you should listen better. But it applies to both people talking, and it really can clear up misunderstandings fast. it is worth learning.
2006-07-28 02:36:05 · answer #2 · answered by nickipettis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't both trying to save the relationship. LEAVE.
Why would you stay in a relationship that you obviously know is bad for you...you are getting hurt after all?
Perhaps staying in the friendship says something about you too?
2006-07-28 02:45:37 · answer #3 · answered by vbrink 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication is the key. If you've tried to honestly communicate without tossing out threats you don't intend on keeping and the other person is just unwilling to budge on their position or compromise, then you have a decision to make.
Will you cave in, and learn and accept to live that way without taking it out on your partner and you move on. It's quite possible that when you move on, that light bulb will finally come on for your partner and they'll know your serious. If it doesn't come on, keep moving on...it wasn't meant to be and there are better out there for you. Maybe this one was just to prepare you for the right one. I wish you the best.
2006-07-28 02:30:59 · answer #4 · answered by J Somethingorother 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask your self this a million question? What am I petrified of whilst he calls me, exchange into the relationship sturdy once you have been in touch with your ex BF, and did he mistreat you, or exchange into he worrying and loving with appreciate for you and your needs? in case you are able to answer that multi point question with a answer of: He exchange into loving and worrying, respecting my needs. then you quite've no longer something to be petrified of. confer with him and enable your thoughts be worry-free. If he exchange into abusive then you quite've some thing to worry. getting in touch with somebody who's abusive now will purely commence an by no ability ending cycle of abuse in the direction of you, you do no longer want this and you need to no longer get entangled with this individual.
2016-10-08 10:17:11 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If u're not comfortable to ask this person out and talk to him/her face to face, either send a text msg to him/her or email to him/her. If this person gets to read it, maybe he/she will understand how u feel. If u dont get an answer, just ignore him/her. It's not worth saving the friendship if it hurts so bad to maintain it.
2006-07-28 02:33:31 · answer #6 · answered by AL75 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes simply walking away from the relationship makes the other person realize that you are serious.
What if you walk away and they don't change? Well, at least you no longer have the problem anymore because they are gone.
2006-07-28 02:30:10 · answer #7 · answered by Randy G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes its hard, sorry its always hard in this situation. Try an get frenz involved that notice it and ask them to be discreet an talk to him personally, and not mention that u asked them to do so. otherwise relationship wise you have to split up an see if he changes for that extreme. Nothin happens theres always someone else for you, dont be stuck on one person, use ur best judgement
2006-07-28 02:32:08 · answer #8 · answered by Julio O 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave them and don't look back. My husband I split up three times before we married, now we have been married for 7 years and it is perfect....he also knows I will not put up with his ****. If it just a friend....you need to stop calling for awhile, when people think we don't need them, they tend to want to be in our lives and will do anything to get back in.
2006-07-28 02:31:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they won't listen. LEAVE. If they don't listen then, oh well, you tried. Good Luck!
2006-07-28 02:28:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋