If your girlfriend said that she was two years younger than she really was, what would you do?

Question

Would you dump her?

When I first met my current boyfriend I said I was 2 years younger than I really was because I was scared my true age woul put him off. I am 27 he is 25.
Now we are begining to get serious...

I want to tell him the truth..but I am scared he would not trust me anymore, and finish with me..

How do I come clean and maintain a relationship?

Answer 1

thats difficult. u could try and talk to him when you are both in a light mood. and be like, babes, whats the craziest thing you ever did to hook up with someone? and then you can be like well, ha thats funny. but me, i did such and such. and on a more serious note, i told you a different age when we hooked up. i'm actually 27. thats obviusly not very tactful but you just gotta let him know. i mean, when you're with someone "age aint nothing but a number" but it mattters. and we all know it. you know the dynamics of your relationship. pull on those to help you out. and dont be all soppy and ah please forgive me coz that just gives guys the reigns to get mad. make it clear that thats how things are and you cant really change it

Answer 2

I don't see how the 2 years would be an issue to begin with? however the lying is, especially about something so trivial. Your way out? Fess up and why. Your riding in the car, he can't get away from you there, just say, "Would it be a big deal if I were 27 instead of 25?" Tell him your sensitive about your age and always have been and the only reason you're telling him now is because he's becoming important to you. Don't act like he has the right to a full blown moral outrage. He's a guy and probably slipped in a couple of lies himself, but if they don't hurt any one who cares? Slip in a lighthearted "sexy older woman" cliche, then he'll think two years isn't exactly "an older woman" and thus the severity is minimized. It's kinda like a baby when it trips, most times if you don't make a big deal it won't. Or you could take the cowards way out and drop the id somewhere and tell him he's mistaken. It depends on how acute his gray matter is. I'd advise honesty with a casual air, this is the true application of the saying, "Two wrongs don't make a right." I hope this helps.

Answer 3

Hmmm... well, I can't talk about the moment, 'cos I'm single now. A similar thing happened in my last relationship though- the girl was quite a bit older than I thought she was, but she told me pretty soon on, before we got too serious. It didn't matter to me at all at the time, I was just into her and who she was.

It's a bit different with you, because you've put off telling him, it could be more of a shock... but two years isn't a major gap, I think he should be able to handle it. I mean, what's age? If he's a good man, I can't imagine he'll be upset. I would try to tell him straight to his face... it is a trust issue, but telling him the truth is going to show that you trust him, and I guess he'll appreciate that. The longer you leave it, the worse it will be... and, at the end of the day, if he can't handle a minor thing like that, you have to question if it's worth getting more serious. You can't hide forever, so pull yourself together, be brave, and 'fess up'.

Answer 4

You know your boyfriend better than we do. Please don't depend on a "guy survey" as the opinions of guys who answer may not be those of your guy.
If he's infatuated with you and/or really cares he will be around for worse than this. Most guys are really sweet and even timid (which we don't realize). If he's not infatuated and doesn't really care, he won't be around for long and it's not worth even telling the truth. If he cares he won't ever go away regardless. If he can't understand and forgive you this one life's going to be really tough with him as he's very rigid.

There probably is a time in the relationship issue here too.

The odds are that at some point he will see your drivers license or something which will show your real age, though. North American men these days don't care so much about age, it seems (born after ca 1968). I am married to someone 5 years younger and have had men who appeared 10 years younger interested.

Yet, it has become extremely fashionable, it seems to lie about one's age.

I had a boyfriend who was supposed to be two years older than me and was actually two years younger. Things would have been better between us and maybe we would have married had I known. As it was, he seemed a bit behind for his age. It took me 15 years to learn the truth!

Still, he is someone I trust 100% as a friend. Lying about age seems to fall in a category called "little white lies". I don't agree but they are common. The age one is too common, in my opinion. What happened to pride in years lived?

One thing where it's no one else's business and no one really wants to know either (whatever they say) is number of sex partners or previous sex life. Whatever anyone claims, unless you are a virgin be vague! For anything else avoid all lies! They only cause problems!

Answer 5

Well, if it is that serious, and the two of you are truly in love, then I don't think it should be a big enough problem to break you up, although he would have every right to feel hurt that you lied to him. Some men might even just laugh and ask why you're so insecure about your age and then tell you they love you anyway.

Don't keep this secret any longer than you already have though. When you do tell him, make sure to include that it was only because you were afraid he wouldn't give you a chance and you were really into him.

Answer 6

How long have you been dating?
If you want the relationship to continue, you have to tell him the truth. How much longer can you go with the lie? It seems like your age would come up a lot through random things, like family, your driver's license, etc.
The problem isn't your age. He wouldn't have a problem with that. The problem is that you didn't tell him the truth, so now it's really up to him. Do your best, and next time, just make sure you start out with your correct age. If someone really likes you, they won't care when the subject of age comes up (unless it's a huge difference).
Or maybe he just won't care....just make sure you tell him that you were insecure w/your age or whatever (that it was about you and not him).

Answer 7

I also dated a woman that is two years older than me, and we did it with no problem. If you're getting serious, then there's no worries at all. Make love to him and while you're butt naked in bed, just resting after a heavy love making session, tell him the truth. I don't think that is a big deal, age ain't nothing but a number, the love you share is more important, and the fact you tell him the truth about it, that will open up the whole relationship.

Answer 8

Just one day let it slip, men always forget dates and numbers, and that is what it is, it's not like you left out something really meaningful or relevant about you that would put in a true jeopardy your relationship.
Met my husband at 20, Dated him for 4 years, and now married to him for 12 years till this date still gets confused with my age and my birth-date and anniversary, and just about any family members'.
So face the truth, and if he is going to dump you because of your age, trust me this guy is not woth it; there are worse things in life that could ruin a relationship.

AG

Answer 9

Two years is nothing, but I have real isssues with people that lie to me at all. If someone will lie about their age, they will very likely lie about everything. I've stopped seeing men that have lied about their age. Come clean, and hope for the best. Make a decision to be more honest in the future. Dishonesty will always bite you in the booty. Good Luck. Peace.

Answer 10

So whats the big deal you told a little white lie. If you were mine and you told me that you were younger than you actually were and then had the decency to tell me the truth after the relationship became stronger , so what? I like or probaly even love you for who you are not your age or your breast size, your figure or even your bank balance. Lighten up kid things could be worse enjoy it, you only live once

Answer 11

I know this is a question for the guys, but my guess is that if you guys have been dating like, a couple months or something, he would prob. think it was cute & funny more than anything. But if you guys have been together for a year or more, I would maybe be more worried. I mean, just explain to him that you wanted him to like you is all. And it was your decision to come clean, so if he tries to say your a dishonest person for lying, point out that you didn't have to tell him, but you CHOOSE to. If he can't get over it then you don't need him anyway.