am 21 and i have been in a relationship i told my boyfriend that i want us to be in the relationship without sex he agreed to it but later on said that we will in the relationship but we will definately do it be fore we get married i said no but he is still insisting and i do not want to have sex before marriage. so waht should i do.
2006-07-27 22:13:43 · 26 answers · asked by miwinky 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There is nothing much that you can do other than maintaining your stand on a no sex relationship before marriage. Unfold ur reasons b4 ur guy and ask him to understand them . I personally respect ur decision and so shud he and more so you. If he ubderstands you, he really loves you, if he doesn't , think about the relation again, he is falling out for carnal desires only.
2006-07-27 22:18:01 · answer #1 · answered by vanchit 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well...if you have been in the relationship for 5 years and he is getting impatient now then tell him yo marry you...
Look, if you don't want to have sex with him then I recommend you tell him you won't and if he wants it then he is just going to have to deal with the fact you two don't agree on this issue. If he still can't wait then break up with him, because if that is all he wants he is not worth the long haul of the relationship. Further more if you have been in this relationship for 5 years and he didn't have any complaints before then maybe you should ask him why it is so important that you have sex with him...ask him for a valid reason. A valid reason means that he already knows everything about you, and can even finish your thoughts, sentences and etc. He knows you completely inside and outside, and the only thing left that he needs to figure out is what you enjoy in bed. If he doesnt say something along the lines of "i know everything about you and to complete this relationship we need to consummate" don't say yes. If he does say something along these lines then you should say that if he knows you so well, he should know that you don't want to have sex until you are married.
2006-07-28 05:20:14 · answer #2 · answered by Strawberry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure you CAN be in a relationship for 5 years and not have sex, but why would you want to?
I think a general rule for guys is that if you don't know if you want to marry a girl after 3 years that it is time to leave her. "Get thee to a nunnery" or get thee married, or let him go. He'll be much happier with someone else and you'll be happier alone in your virtue.
Sex is a real part of a serious relationship. It doesn't sound like you want a serious relationship, but that you want to pretend. A good time to get married is a year and a half after dating someone. Staying celibate up to two years prior to marriage (while dating or affianced) may be commendable, but waiting for 5 years (and expecting someone else to do the same) is pathological, in my opinion.
Maybe it's a religious thing, but there are probably just as many religious issues that prove you wrong as well as right. I won't go into them here.
2006-07-28 05:32:59 · answer #3 · answered by Wyld Stallyns 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless u dont want sex no 1 in this world can force u 2 hve it. U only agree if u realy want it otherwise breakup wid him. N chose the places 2 date which has more public around so he wont get chance n make some distance.
2006-07-28 05:17:07 · answer #4 · answered by pastakanasta 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually sex and marraige have no relation. making love is something that'll happen on its own when you two are in the mood and there is a strong emotional bond and utmost trust between you and your boyf. If you've been together for that long, it would seem there is enough compatibility, emotional understanding and a familiarity with each other. this is just me thinking, but sex seems to be just the next natural progression.
2006-07-28 05:26:47 · answer #5 · answered by ritzycash 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The hard thing is, he might loose interest in you, or he might cheet you during your relationship...5yrs without sex...that's harsh for a guy in his early 20's...
But he will wait if he really loves you. And you might not know, you might want to have sex during your long 5 yrs!
It might be the idea that's making you afraid. And it won't be better if your bf is keep on asking you. You'll get more freaked out.
So don't feel up tight about this, I think you should follow what you feel. If you still feel you want to keep your self virgin, or not during your relationship, you will not know.
2006-07-28 05:22:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your decision to refrain from sex before marriage is commendable. If the guy truly loves you he will respect your decision and wait till you get married. Keep your self pure until you find the right man at the right time and at the right situation.
2006-07-28 05:22:40 · answer #7 · answered by Jeth L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It'll be trying. You two would have to be strong enough to endure. Think about this though. 'Saving yourself for marriage' provides an empty incentive for marriage. If there are problems, it could keep him just barely on board. Then, once you have sex, that's gone and the marriage loses one of its pillars.
Just an odd thought I just came up with, but something to consider.
2006-07-28 05:18:33 · answer #8 · answered by Phil 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this sounds bad but I wouldn't marry anyone without knowing how they are in the bedroom. What if you don't like the same things or satisfy each other or have the same ideals about sex
2006-07-28 07:05:12 · answer #9 · answered by freeatlastboone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not do it. S## should not be a requirement prior to marriage. It should be an expression to love and intimacy; thus, if you are uncomfortable, do not do it ; however, some guys will use a lot of tricks like begging, force, and drugs, etc. It is best to be careful to defend your choice.
2006-07-28 05:20:30 · answer #10 · answered by johndoe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋