Suppose you are invovled in a casual sexual relationship with a female. The two of you have no other partners. The female decides to end it, because she has developed feelings for you. You are asked by that female if the feelings are mutual and you say nothing. You don't say yes or no. I am currently in this situation and I am trying to figure out what is going on with the guy, but I don't have a clue. Help.
2006-07-27 21:25:30 · 15 answers · asked by yp_renee_laplace 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have asked him repeatedly and he tells me to drop it. Why can't he just simply tell me how he feels? I told him that it doesn't matter if the response is good or bad, I want to know. So, what's the problem?
2006-07-27 21:42:38 · update #1
I was in that situation. I told her the truth, and said, "No." But that's just me, I'm very forthright about telling people exactly where they stand with me, if they want to know.
As for your situation, I don't know. If I put myself into his shoes:
I could see myself staying quiet because I didn't want to commit and didn't want to end the physical relationship either, and just want to put it off until I can get another few chances in bed with her.
I could see myself staying quiet because I DID have feelings, and didn't want to say so, because that would be affirming what I was afraid of, and open me up to get hurt.
I could see myself staying quiet because I didn't want to hurt her, and I'm unsure of my feelings, and just want time to examine the situation to see if there COULD be feelings for her.
I could see myself staying quiet because I had my eye on another woman, and wanted to see if that could work out before giving an answer to the question...
I could keep writing for an hour, if I had the time. There's infinite possibilities for silence after that question. If I were you, I'd ask again, and tell him you'll ask once every time you meet until you get an answer. But, also tell him that it's ok to answer with, "I'm not ready to answer that yet." That'll save you from the uncomfortable silence.
Good Luck! And... remember, getting what you want now isn't always what you'd want if you could see what's in your future. If this doesn't work, maybe it's for the best.
Hang in there, you'll find happiness.
2006-07-27 21:44:38 · answer #1 · answered by 42ITUS™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The casual sexual relationship you had with this guy at some point crossed a thresh-hold that was unexpected by both of you. Feelings, tenderness, gentle desire, hormonal fireworks. What is scary is that you do have feelings for this guy. You need to know. You both need to know where you want to go if anywhere. You must have felt that if you did develop feelings for this guy (which you did) that the relationship would have to change. The minute you did have feelings, it did change.
One thing I could never quite do is have a casual sexual relationship. I always liked the idea, but my heart had reservations. You don't have to love someone to have great sex with someone, but for me it sure helps.
I hope this helps.
2006-07-27 21:44:12 · answer #2 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there are guys who can live in sexual relationship without any feelings involve, and females do have fragile feelings, you can easily fall and involve your feelings for a guy whom you just had casual sex with... or maybe you can look the other way around you give time for him to think because it is also possible that he also has feelings for you and he was just quite surprise when you opened your intimate feelings to him , he just doesnt know how to answer you on that exact moment
2006-07-27 21:44:25 · answer #3 · answered by rohn 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been in my share of casual relationships and I've had the same thing happen to me. I think he didn't say anything because he doesn't feel the same way. He didn't want to hurt your feelings or embarass you. Now I could be totally wrong but that is what I think.
2006-07-27 21:29:07 · answer #4 · answered by makeherwett 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he doesn't know.
My view is casual sex always leads to problems because eventually emotions will heat up in one or two of the people involved. Casual sex may be enjoyable but it rarely ends well.
Good Luck
2006-07-27 21:29:28 · answer #5 · answered by Jon H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He just want to remain the casual sexual relationship with you and nothing much.
2006-07-27 21:30:35 · answer #6 · answered by Tan D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why did you start it in the first place...if you had No response from the guy- means there is probably no strong tie withyou on his part & probably very little emotional connection either- he's probably in deep thought figuring who will take the place of you for those sexual encounters
2006-07-27 21:30:08 · answer #7 · answered by Shuffleking Jr. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you're falling in love and he just wants casual sex to continue. He's using you for sex. Time to move on to someone who will appreciate you for more than that.
2006-07-27 21:43:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he got used to the sex with no strings attached and now u are lookin to take that away from him he is upset however he is probably tryin to figure out a way to tell u what he feels
2006-07-27 21:28:34 · answer #9 · answered by ksneon66 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is probably in shock and surprised that you want to end it . Why end it if you have feelings for him take it for what it is and run with it. Besides he might be your soulmate.
2006-07-27 21:32:11 · answer #10 · answered by MRBOMBBUDS 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋