Are the 3s worse than the terrible 2s??? If so how do I encourage my daughter to be "a good girl?"?

Question

We use timeout (the SuperNanny method) but that just stops the behavior for that moment. Ten minutes later she is back in timeout for the same offense- whether it is screaming, pushing her 14 month old brother, hitting, etc.). And I swear it has gotten worse since she turned 3. Please tell me it is a stage! Any advise???

Answer 1

I do think 3 can be worse then 2, because their bossiness, and attitudes are coming out now. I think 2 is the cutest age, but anyway, here is how we discipline our children, and it works:
I think time outs would work if the parents are CONSISTANT about the whole thing. I think it's harder than spankings. Here is how my husband and I spank our children:

answer: out of pure love-
never out of anger,
never with a raised voice.
Firmly, but not to hard.
with consistancy
I spank my children for 3 things, and 3 things only:
1. Lying
2. Disobedience (I mean obeying your voice the 1st time)
3. bad attitudes

If they got these 3 down pat, they will be very well-behaved children. Very pleasant to be around. When one of these 3 things are broken, I get the paddle (wooden spoon usually), and they must touch the bed, and stand still to get their spankings. Usually about 2 or 3 firm ones. Enough to sting. Depends on the crime. I hate lying more than anything, so they might get about 7 of those for lying. Then, after the spanking session is over, I ask them why they got spanked. They must tell me why, or some kind of communiction went wrong. Then they must say they are sorry, and name the thing they got spanked for. Saying "I'm sorry" is not enough. They must say "I'm sorry for _______". Then I give them a hug, love them up, and tickle them or something to keep the communication lines open. never tell them to go to their room after you spanked because they will just think of reasons why that was so unfair, or why they were right, and you were wrong. Yes, spanking must be administered in love. Never spank for accidents, or things like they are just being kids- such as running around, or being loud or things like that (unless you tell them to stop- then that would be disobeying.) I am a mother of three, and have peaple begging me to babysit my kids because they are happy, sweet, enjoyable children. Perfect??? Haaa!!! NOPE!!! But they are enjoyable to be around for the most part. I love them, and spend time with them, read them books on free time.

Hope this helps- and a key word is CONSISTANT- don't spank them for something one day, and let them get away with it tomarrow or this method won't work. It's not easy, but rewarding.

Answer 2

She's sounds a lot like my son, who's 2. Maybe that method doesn't work for her. I had always planned to use timeout with my kids, but can already surmise that it won't be a good motivator for my son. Sounds like a strong willed kid. And the honest to goodness best remedy for a strong willed kid? A very close relationship with the parent, the kind that happens from attachment parenting. It has done WONDERS for my headstrong little man. Granted, most of the time now, I try to prevent the occurence from ever happening, that's the best form of discipline of all, controlling the environment. But....we can't always do that. You have to find what motivates your kid. Obviously, she doesn't really care if she's in timeout for a few minutes, so the threat of it isn't going to motivate her to do what she's supposed to do. I'll list some books that were very helpful to me with my own ball of fire. The main things I try and follow (other than controlling the environment, trying to prevent what triggers his bad behavior in the first place)
1)Give choices - this one can help with figuring out what motivates your kids to be naughty/nice. Example: we were going bye-bye and my son (who wanted to go) screamed and didn't want to sit in his car seat for anything. This is of course not allowed, so I told him he could get in his seat to go bye-bye, or he could stay home. Shockingly he chose to stay home (granted you gotta be prepared to follow through!). However, a few minutes later, he decided he really did want to go, and quietly got into his seat. Problem solved. Had I just yelled at him or tried to do a battle of wills (i.e. "You WILL get in this seat, young man!) all that woulda happened is 2 angry people, neither enjoying the outing.
2) For screaming, I tell him if he wants to scream, he can go to his room or go outside. He'll go to one if he really wants to, but most of the time he just stops so he can stay where everyone else is. This kinda goes back to #1!
The books are more helpful than me, cuz I'm tired and I don't remember anything, so check it out!

Answer 3

. It could be a stage........Sometimes as parents we make certain situations worse..............You may be trying too hard to be a good parent and expect too much of your 3 year old............Put yourself in her place for a minute..........Now as a three year old you wake up in the a.m. and you may already be in a bad mood because you know your mom is going to expect too much from you and you are stressed......Seriously Mom. Try changing your routine....Ask the 3 year old to help you with anything....
Include your 3yr old by just talking about the day. Ask the child what would they like to play with, and play with you...........
Your 3 yr old no doubt feels like they are on the back burner since there is a younger sibling who do doubt gets more attention than the 3 yr old..............Play with your child....Read a story at bedtime.Let child pick out book. Praise child when he or she does a good thing....Never put child down harshly.....just explain what they did wrong and how to do it right...
Drop something on the floor purposely and say "sweetie would you pick that up for mommy please? Then kiss child and thank child for helping......Let 3 yr old help and go get you a diaper for baby.....If child says no, then say thats ok..I'll go get it and I can run faster than you! Let child pick our breakfast or lunch and help......

Answer 4

She may be trying to get more attention, try to give her a little extra attention, get her to help you with things, my boyfriends daughter (shes 3) likes to help me with the laundry or stir something when i cook. Let her do certain things and tell her only big girls who behave can do it. I keep stickers around for her and let her put them on her toy box when she does something she is supposed to do or is told to do. She also needs to be rewarded for good behavior and that is how they learn. When she starts to misbehave and there is something she wants to do, for example go to grandmas, play outside, color, anything really, tell her if she keeps acting up she doesnt get to do it. All of these things work for my boyfriends daughter and she is learning but it takes time.

Answer 5

i dont know why they call it the terrible 2s coz it starts at 1 and doesnt finish till they are about 18! lol

Answer 6

she getting smarter and she's bored,she needs something new and different
and 4 and 5 or a progression of this also they need something to occupy there minds