What can someone do about a 12 year old bully?

Question

Niece has been harassed for months by a 12 year old female. The bully has also enlisted her older sister in the harassment process with calls, letters, gossip etc... Well the other day it went a bit further. Niece went to a friends house and the bully happened to be there. She said she'd rather not stay and started to leave. The bully ran up and pushed her down the stairs. Niece now has a broken arm and shoulder and will require surgery. Bully is going around praising herself and telling everyone that she broke someone's arm and bragging it up. Have reported to police but they seem to care less.

Answer 1

I want to tell you that I did research last year on children who are bullied for a paper I was writing, and I was physically ill from what I found out. I had no idea how horrible the bullying is in the US. And I'm not talking about just teasing, I'm talking like what your niece is going through by being Physically harmed.
There is a website that has a lot of good information on it that I found. Sadly, the website was started because a little boy named Jared was being bullied, and he couldn't take it anymore, so he shot himself. His mother, who is just amazing, started the web-page. The web address is www.Bullypolice.com You can get tips on preventing bullying, to help a child that is bullied, and even what States have anti-bullying laws. They rate them on what States is the best, and what ones are the worst.
Many parents don't want to believe or think it's a big deal if their child is a bully, so I don't know if your family has spoke to this girls parents, but I would seriously do that. I would also demand that they pay for your niece's medical bills, and if they don't, I would take them to court.
I see that you are obviously very concerned about this, and I'm so happy that you want to do something to help your niece. People need to wake-up and realize what a serious problem this really is. She needs to understand that only weak people who don't like their-self are bullies, and she hasn't done anything to do deserve this.
I hope the website helps
.

Answer 2

Definately time to be assertive-- ignoring the bully won't help and it teaches your niece that it is O.K. to be assaulted.

1. You filed a police report, good. Now follow it up with calls (as many as it takes) to your local prosecuting attorney. Don't let up. Either the juvenile prosecutor needs to prosecute or tell the family why he or she wont.

2. Get a protection or anti-harassment order against the girl. Enlist an attorney to help you, definately. The attorney will put the case together for the order substantiating the harassment. A finding by the judge that the girl has been harassing your niece will be very important for step 3.

3. Sue the parent's for your uninsured medical costs, intentional infliction of emotional distress and damages for your niece's pain and suffering. If the parents have a house they have a homeowner's policy. Don't be afraid to call around and interview a number of different attorneys.

4. If any of the threats have been ocurring at school contact the school board. Seems like principals and teachers would rather ignore bullying but It is the school board that hires and fires administrators and has to respond to lawsuits.

Definately be aggressive. The girls parents have obviously trained her to be the way she is, I wouldn't expect anything but resistence and denial from them. Again, you can try to do these things yourself but a lawyer can do them so much better and quicker and with the lawsuit for damages you might not end up paying as much as you think.

Answer 3

Take it further. Copy the letters and take a copy of your telephone bill that reveals the calls that were made. Take a copy to the school administrators and the teacher. Take a copy to the School Board and reveal the information, including the hospital report, publically. Demand an order of protection from the police department. If they do not comply, go to the alderman and demand action. Your niece could have been killed or injuried in a worse maner. The fact that the bully is bragging shows how much of a menance she is. Do not wait too late and end up sorry. Your niece has the right to go to school unharmed and you need to let the parent of the friend know how she allowed this action to take place in her home and that you need her to verify what happened. Stop this child before someone else is hurt or someone is fatally attacked. That girl needs therapy and her parents need to be involved. Demand it. Just because you are not the parent does not mean you can not be involved. God be with you.

Answer 4

I don't know where you live or what the certain circumstances are, but even at 12 a child (and their parents) can get into trouble for bullying!!! I believe it is harassment just as if an adult were to do it. If it has become physical and is unwanted or unsolicited physical contact I believe it is assult! And I believe that the parents of the bully would be responsible for any medical bills that came from any aggressive physical contact. I don't know about the rumors, and how that works!
If nothing else you could go after the bully's parents in civil court and get the medical bills covered. Good luck...I wouldn't just let this go on!

Answer 5

You've done all the right things so far. And the above poster is right. Document everything and make it clear to teachers, staff, and administration that your child has a right to be safe at school and that you are not past involving the police to file assault charges and the board of education. But that you really want to avoid that. That you want a plan to help make this stop. However, PLEASE, examine your son's behavior first. No child "asks for it", however, make sure that your son isn't part of the problem before you start to raise a stink. Not that he is, just make sure he isn't. And boost your son's self-confidence. Boys that have high-self esteem generally don't get bullied. As sad as it is, as a teacher I've seen that kids that usually get bullied are the kids that don't have many friends and aren't socially popular. A self-defense class is a great idea, more for the confidence building than anything else.

Answer 6

File a complaint! Your niece could have fallen and broken her neck, ended up dead or paralyzed. That bully should be brought up on charges, then forced to get counseling and her parents make restitution for all medical bills - at the very least!

Parents today are not teaching their children empathy at a young age, that's why I think we have so many problems today. People are valuing competitiveness over cooperativeness. Sad.

Answer 7

Police too busy writing tickets and harassing law abiding Citizens to concern themselves with real crime.

Sue the parents. Put a lien on there house, car(s), boat, etc. Conditions for removal of liens, and settlement to include:
A) Restitution in form of payment for all hospital bills incurred.
B) Proof positive that bully daughter (and sister) has been sent to, and is attending help and counseling for this disruptive immature, low self-esteem behavior. These girls, are going nowhere in life on present course and need your help, if parents are now unwilling or unable to control them and act like responsible parents.
C) Community work for child in neighborhood of occurrence wearing detention uniform....min. of 30 days (two hrs. a day after school) for each incident reported by yourself and others in neighborhood.

Answer 8

I would call her parents and talk to them to find out if they really know what their daughters have been doing to other people. If this doesn't work I would continue to report any type of harassment to the police until they get sick and tired of it. I would also try my best to get a restraining order against both girls so if either one of them comes near your niece they will get in trouble with the law.

Answer 9

Go make a police report. Most departments have a youth officer that handle complaints dealing with juveniles. when it goes to court, the judge will make a decision on the charges and also make the parents pay restitution for bills incurred from the injury.

Answer 10

Take the girl AND her parents to court. That being said. My girls are in Tae Kwon Do. My oldest, was being picked on by a boy at school. In gym class, he ran up to her and out of reflex, she gave him a shot to the stomache. He ran off and told the teacher. Not a thing was said or done to my daughter. The boy never bothered her again.

Peace is obtained through victory.