A Letter from a Taxpayer?

Question

The Honorable Paul S. Sarbanes
309 Hart Senate Office Building Washington DC, 20510

Dear Senator Sarbanes,

As a native Marylander and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Immigration and Naturalization Service in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

My reasons for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stem from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, what I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years.

I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out. Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.

Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications.

If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.

Your Loyal Constituent, Pete

Answer 1

PETE. You are THE man. That's awesome! I agree with you 100%. We need to close our borders, throw out the illegals and start supporting our own citizens! I hope you'll be voting for Michael Steele in the upcoming elections in Maryland. I know, if elected, he wouldn't stand for the type of guest worker amnesty the Senate passed, including all of the provisions which enable a person who is illegal to magically "become" legal by paying back taxes and learning English. Love the letter and I should follow suit. Good job.

Answer 2

Lovely

Answer 3

if i understand correctly an illegal alien doesnt pay taxes he just pays 2,000 dollr fine and that sounds like the sh!t to me.
ill just rip up my papers wouldnt that work?

Answer 4

Geez, can we all get that retroactive deal? I heard they were firing IRS lawyers assigned to rich people...Can we get the retro-active deal and a free pass on a couple of audits?

Answer 5

I even have met or considered or heard a lot of human beings communicate approximately how they grew up on welfare or mandatory it for a time & have been waiting to arise to artwork & then circulate decrease back to college & get promoted & strengthen their very own infants to circulate to circulate colledge. i think of you're able to do some reseach in this. while i exchange right into a toddler if a individual exchange into black case in point, it exchange into very unlikley they could circulate to colledge. on a similar time as no longer all blacks have been on welfare it nonetheless could be a manner for you initiate via finding at what number effective black anybody is giving decrease back to this united states because of the fact of their help from the government. we are all the goverment. i do no longer think of we pay as lots into public housing as we do into overpriced housing. merely look on the fee distinction & you may truthfully see one is a lot extra high priced. So do somewhat examine & usually you will locate people who rose from rags to richs & who provide lots to this united states. Oprah Winfrey exchange into raised via a mom & her mom's b/f as much as a undeniable age & i be attentive to her mom worked in a basement of laundry or some thing yet they nonetheless could have mandatory some information. That exchange into between the 1st issues Oprah did while she had funds exchange into to retire her mom. ..i don't be attentive to that individuals have not deliver letters to the white homestead or completed different issues out of thank you. all of us thank as quickly as we take excitement in & as quickly as we take excitement in our existence grows in fee. a lot of human beings have of course completed alright when you have information & it may be superb to be attentive to who they're & what they have carried out. that's complicated to be honest however in this united states becauase of reps. & their could shame human beings. lots is stored from the wide-unfold public & lies are informed extra effective than the reality.

Answer 6

I'm with Pete.Sounds like a good idea.

Answer 7

Best sh*t I've heard all day! Wonder if it actually worked ..lol