2006-07-27 07:35:16 · 15 answers · asked by Pru 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You are responsible for the groomsman dinner in a traditional wedding
Pay for the Dj and bar tickets if you can
2006-07-27 07:38:47 · answer #1 · answered by boredgirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This will be the most un-romantic, un-good-sport response you will get, but it's important that you recognize a very important thing: You are RESPONSIBLE for absolutely NOTHING. No law can hold you to any responsibility regarding someone else's (even your child's) wedding.
That said, no matter what so-called 'tradition' dictates, every wedding I've ever been associated with (including my own) had a different idea of who should pay for what and it usually meant saddling unsuspecting participants with expenses that they have no control over.
My father could barely pay his own bills and kept fielding calls from my future in-laws regarding expenses that were so-called 'his' responsibility. Don't let 'tradition' or anyone else dictate; do what you feel comfortable doing.
What's important is how much YOU want and are able to contribute. Speak to whoever is planning the wedding (pro wedding planner, future daughter-in-law, etc.) and offer to help up to the point, and no more, that you are willing and able - both financially and time-wise - to contribute. Maybe there are some non-traditional aspects of the wedding that no one is quite certain who should pay for. Maybe you are fortunate enough financially to help in ways that aren't expected.
No matter what answers you receive in this forum, it won't answer the question of how you can contribute to the actual wedding that is being planned for (and, hopefully, by) your son. Ask the people involved.
Good luck.
2006-07-27 15:16:52 · answer #2 · answered by W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only things you're responsible for are the rehearsal dinner and all of the flowers, except for the bridal bouquets. Some of these people have it wrong, you are NOT responsible for the honeymoon, the rings, or the tux, the groom is. JUST the rehearsal dinner and flowers, nothing else. If the bride's parents can't afford everything else and you have more money than them, then it would be nice of you to offer to pay for other stuff, but you're not obligated. When I got married my husband's parents were way better off than my single dad, so they did help out.
2006-07-27 16:16:30 · answer #3 · answered by SweetPea 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really don't think that you are responsible for anything, it's your sons wedding not yours. It would be nice if you helped but in a way that YOU choose. I have heard of the grooms parents paying for the reception, but if that is something that you can't afford I don't think you should do it and I don't think that your son should expect that of you. Do what you feel comfortable with.
2006-07-27 16:49:14 · answer #4 · answered by AMY P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This should really be discussed with the bride and groom as well so all of you are on the same page.
But - since you ask:) Traditionally you only pay for the dinner rehersal. This can be anywhere from Pizza (that's what we did, it was great) for a formal sit down meal.
2006-07-27 16:46:45 · answer #5 · answered by glitter3317 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Traditionally its the grooms parents job to host the rehearsal dinner and some pay for the honeymoon. Things have changed a lot over the year so assume you need to host the rehearsal dinner and if you can atleast contribute to the honeymoon and that can double as your wedding present.
2006-07-27 14:51:44 · answer #6 · answered by amyclay350 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
These days there are no hard and fast rules for things like this. You should talk about it with your son and his fiance, who should also talk about it with her parents. It really should be a co-operative decision.
For my wedding, we looked at various expenses and allocated them out depending on what people could contribute ie my dad paid for the reception, my mom paid for the dresses, his parents paid for the photography, video etc and we picked up the tab for anything outstanding.
2006-07-27 14:55:53 · answer #7 · answered by mel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That all depends on what your son and future daughter-in-law discuss with you. When I got married in January, I didn't want my mom or his mom to pay for anything. BUT, my mom being my mom, bought my gown, accessories, helped out with souveniers as well as other things. Discuss that with them and see what they would like for you to be responsible for or even better -- suggest paying for something like the DJ
2006-07-27 15:11:41 · answer #8 · answered by Scarlett 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you would like to.
I think if the couple is mature enough to get married, they should be responsible enough to pay for the biggest party of their lives. Anything you give them is extra icing on the cake.
2006-07-27 14:51:58 · answer #9 · answered by justagal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as he is an adult, you really are not responsible for anything. An adult man and woman should be paying for their own wedding. However, if you want to help out, have a sit-down with her parents and the couple, and discuss what you are willing to help out with. But, these days, you are not obligated. Anything you contribute would be gratefully appreciated by them.
2006-07-27 16:19:47 · answer #10 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
BLESS YOU.....my family isn't helping me at all.
But you're responsible for anything that has to do with him.
Tux, ring for her, also, the transportation, the hotel the night of their wedding, the cake, the ceremony site and the music
2006-07-27 14:48:36 · answer #11 · answered by Unbreakable 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋