whem Is it ok to spank a >4 year old?

Question

sometimes the kid does things to be totally disrespectful...I think he needs to be smacked

Answer 1

yes yes yes and YES again if you dont spank your child then i beleive you dont love them

Answer 2

I have a 4 year old and I have 2 year old twins. I feel that spanking is needed when warranted. There are times when we lax on spanking then have to tighten the ropes again. We even have a 'mr. mean' (paddle ball paddle w/out the ball & string).


The key is to be consistant. You have to be. If you spank one minute for one thing, but the next minute, the kid does the same thing but you allow them to get away with it, you are sending the message to them that they can and will get away with it. And then try to use that same thinking on other things they know they cant get away with. Even if you have to start today, sit them down and let them know if they do this, they are going to get a spanking. Our kids get spankings for: back talk, growling, hitting, biting, spitting, saying NO (that's a big one). Let them know that from now on, this is how things are going to go. There are no chances. (we have had to go to no chances. They'd know there were x amount of chances before they'd get a busting. Not anymore) They say NO or do any of the above mentioned, they get spanked. I havent had to use Mr. Mean in a long while, until last night.


I know kids are young, but being consistant is the key. If you get a handle on them now, they will not be little terrors when you try to take them into public. Of coarse there are going to be melt downs. All kids have them, whether they are angels or terrors. It's enevitalbe. They are kids and sometimes unpredictable.


And if you have to do it in public, it's okay. It's your kid! If someone looks at me like they cant belive I just spanked my own kids, I look at them right back with a 'just push me' look. I would imagine they had a perfect childhood and never got spanked. I've had to let other people know it's none of their business and I am handling my own kids the way I see fit. Leave us alone. etc... I could go on about this one.


I hope this helps.

Answer 3

Spanking should not start until after 5 yrs old. By then they know enough to learn the rules and be punished when they don't follow. The only time a child should be physically punished is for school work. Everything else is learned behavior. If you raise a child, do it right. Love them, don't get angry at every thing they do wrong, or if they break something, or if they cry and won't stop and it annoys you.

Children do need discipline, but sparingly, and still show them you love them even when they are bad. They need love and attention. If they act out, it may be because they want attention from you.

Answer 4

The reason there are so many disrespectful kids these days are because of all the people who are against spanking.

At the age of 4, i would reason and tell him why what he is doing is disrespectful and warn him not to do it again. If he does it again i would spank him. He needs to know that they are negative consequences for such behaviour. If reasoning doesnt help, obviously he isnt mature enough for it and needs a smack to get the point across. Do this consistently for a few times and he will totally get it.

Answer 5

I have a 7 year old boy and a 10 year old girl. I have never smacked my daughter, but my son got a spanking when he intentionally crossed a side road when I told him repeatedly not to. I only believe in spanking as a form of discipline in a life or death situation. My son is much more disrespectful than my daughter. When I put him in his room, I have to physically hold the door close, because he will not stay in there. I remove the tv, playstation, and any toys or games. He is left with books to ponder through. Good luck to you!!

Answer 6

As long as you hit your child with an open hand and never a closed fist it is legal. You have to try other things besides spanking though because after a while they just laugh and run. It is ok to spank but you need to communicate and tell him why you did it. That way they know its tough love and not hate. Talking is the key, at that age they don't know what is right and wrong especially if you don't explain why it is wrong. But you need to teach them to respect everybody not just you. With good parenting your child will turn out ok, so don't worry to much.

Answer 7

There is a difference between "smacking" and " spanking" for discipline. Try time outs and taking away privileges, if that doesn't work try redirecting behavior with another activity. Use spanking as a last resort, don't go crazy. He's basically being a typical four year old, independent and "active".

Answer 8

It is ok to pop his butt if he isn't listening and doing it totally out of disrespect. "Time out" doesn't work for every child, and it is my honest opinion that respect has been lost for parents *because* of the "time out" mentality.

It is never ok to beat your child, and I don't believe in smacking a kid across the face.

I would rather smack my kids hand or butt when he keeps playing with that electric outlet than watch my kid get electrocuted. Time out doesn't cut it.

Spanking is *NOT* illegal. Beating your kid is illegal. There isn't even a fine line. The difference is very clear.

I do agree spanking should only be used in a situation that is clearly in need of a slight fear factor. Life or death or harm to others, etc..

Answer 9

I spank my kids, but not all the time. You have to realize that spanking doesn't work for every child. My oldest daughter hates to be spanked, but my 4 year old could care less. I only spank for serious stuff. If he is being disrespectful with his mouth, his punishment should include his mouth (like saying he is sorry). If his disrespectfulness includes his body (like hitting or kicking) his punishment should include his body (time out, cleaning a mess he made,etc).

Answer 10

i think he should've been smaked by the time he turned 1. cause be the time he is 8,the kid is going to be very disrespectful. i'm 15 and i know that if i do anything wrong, i will get in big trouble...and the reason why i show that respect is because i don't want to be hit. so it is best to spank him. don't listen to those people who say that it isn't good to spank your kids. because all that'll do is making you get too soft on your kids and then they'll end up controlling YOU...and the reason why is because they know that when they do something wrong,they know they wont get in trouble for it.

so do what you feel is best: spank his badd a**. but don't ABUSE him.

Answer 11

I actually have memories of me getting spanked when I was a child. It wasn't very pleasant..and I wish I didn't have them. I believe that it is possible to disipline a child without the use of physical contact. When children are young, yes, they will sometimes get out of hand but do you really want your kids to remember that as a childhood memory? I don't know, the choice is obviously up to you but my answer would be never.