I've been together with my gf for 12 months - living with her for over 6 months... yet she still has photos of her exes on her computer and elsewhere in the house. She asked me to "de-ex" my life before we moved in together but she hasn't done the same. She says she hasn't had time. This makes me feel like she doesn't respect the way I feel. Should I ask her yet again to get rid of the photos?
2006-07-27 03:26:21 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If she had no asked you to de-ex your life before you moved in together, I would say the pics are part of her history, part of who she is she is not in contact with the ex's now, then they are no threat to you.
However, since she did ask you to de-ex your life then it is only fair that she do the same, otherwise you are justified in feeling hurt and upset as she is invoking a double-standard and disrespecting your feelings. You should ask her to put the photos away in storage (if on the computer, save to disc then delete off the computer) like a box in the back of the closet .
2006-07-27 03:36:55 · answer #1 · answered by bottleblondemama 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Of course she should get rid of the photos if you and she have a serious relationship.
That's the "if" -- you need to talk to her to find out why her ego still needs all those photos around.
They are more than "memories", they are representative of feelings that she had for someone else and thus they are disturbing to you.
You do have the right to ask her to at least put the pictures somewhere that you don't have to see them. She should have made time to do this if she repsected your feelings and cared about you.
Time to assess this relationship????
2006-07-27 03:32:23 · answer #2 · answered by DD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, tell her that she is contradicting her own principal by keeping them there. You will get her attention immediately after saying this. Tell her that you feel she is being unfair about the whole situation and it is making you rethink about the two of you. If she is really into you she will start clearing those pics immediately. If it is of any consolance: My bf has pics of his exs but he keeps those in the attic where it belongs. I'm totally cool with that as it tells me that he has moved on from his exs and that he still respects them as humans that has feelings.
2006-07-27 03:32:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell her that you would appriciate it if she wold get rid of them pictures because it makes you uncomfurtable. And if she dosnt do that then maybe you should put pics of you ex on the computer or where ever you want. It seems like she dosnt want to let go of the past and move on. Maybe she still loves them or something.
2006-07-27 03:32:36 · answer #4 · answered by good_gurl_4_no_1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask your self those questions: a million) Do the photos characterize competition to you? if so, how? 2) Do you spot the photos as a risk on your marriage? 3) If the photos under no circumstances existed, yet you knew he had an identical photos ingrained in his memories, ought to that worry you a lot less? in case you replied sure to variety a million or 2, the merely valid rationalization for feeling this way if those women persons were nonetheless in contact with your husband socially or your husband had cheated on you with them. with reference to variety 3, do you imagine your husband ought to tell the reality in case you requested him if he nonetheless fantasized about human beings he once dated? ought to you tell the reality in case your husband requested you an identical question? i don't think of that is perfect that he has those photos and he's somewhat dumb for permitting you in searching them. And at the same time as mendacity about them is incorrect, who does no longer lie about something like this. He lied because he needs you to trust you're the merely lady he ever thinks of. notably regular actually. If those women persons are merely in his previous and under no circumstances had something to do with you or your marriage, i does no longer make a huge deal out of it. The photos merely characterize memories of the previous and all of us have previous sexual relationships that we remember.
2016-11-26 02:36:32 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes,you should talk to her and tell her how you feel about all this,she has to give you the same love n respect as to what she expects from you...
not having time is just a reason,if she wabts to really delete it,it just takes a sec to do so,i guess you should be a lil firm n ask her whats on her mind??
2006-07-27 03:31:10 · answer #6 · answered by country_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she still gto pic of her ex it mean she still not over him and stuff so u should kinda dump her or ask her y u still got pic of ur ex u still got feeling 4 dem or somthin and if she do u should really dump her like now it might hurt u but if she really luv u she wouldnt b having pic of her ex everywhere or she could still b cing dem u better talk wit her fast ur leave her b4 u get hurt
2006-07-27 03:34:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take them down yourself if they bother you. Or better yet take them down and put your photos of you two in them. Then when she asks why you did it tell her that it bothered you. If she wants to argue about it then I would find another girlfriend cuz she seems to have issues.
2006-07-27 03:40:18 · answer #8 · answered by aimstir31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course. If she doesn't take any action again it means she cannot forget her ex then dump her.
2006-07-27 03:30:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly, I might put photos away, but I never destroy them
2006-07-27 03:31:12 · answer #10 · answered by kayboff 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋