Is it normal for a person who is bipolar to just decide to not want to be your friend (when a couple weeks ago asked that you'd STAY their friend) and then just turn on you for no reason whatsoever? Do they have thoughts in their head that they are assuming others KNOW what the thoughts are when they haven't been expressed in any way? I am in an emotional roller coaster with my best friend. I don't want to lose his friendship but I'M starting to get emotionally drained from it all and I don't know how much longer I can take this friendship even though I truly adore this person. How do I deal with this? I have NO control over how he handles bipolar - meds, etc. -not a relative and I'm not close with his relatives -- just him. I don't want to blow him off and yet, I need some emotional sanity too. As a rule, he's a very caring person but not right now- he may be tomorrow -- and the next day maybe not. I just never know. I'm afraid to talk to him sometimes.
2006-07-27 02:41:04 · 9 answers · asked by butterfliesRfree 7 in Health ➔ Mental Health
He does NOT want to discuss "bipolar" with me at all -- I tried giving him advice before and he got angry.
2006-07-27 02:41:28 · update #1
I did some research on meds and gave him information and he got mad. He does not and will not take meds.
2006-07-27 03:50:58 · update #2
I hate to tell you this, but you cannot change the situation. You either have to accept it as it is, or cut it off. Bi-polar people usually have a secondary diagnosis also, like obsessive-compulsive, or anti-social disorder. They will flare up and swear it was your fault. They will start accusing you of things you didn't do or say. Remember, this is not their fault, it's a symptom. And it is extremely draining. I have a child like this, and have to watch every word I say, or it will set him off. I have learned to just back off and let him come to me if he wants to talk or be a part of our family. It's so difficult. Bi-polars are famous for adjusting or not taking their medications. They are very self-centered and I hate to say this to you, but this person is not thinking of you or your feelings or how it affects you. It's sad. If you want to stay sane, take care of yourself first and stop worrying yourself about your friend....back off. And if it gets to be too much with him, just tell him that all of his problems are causing you some severe emotional problems and you have to be away from him for a while. God Bless you for trying. But...it's a losing battle.
2006-07-27 02:53:23 · answer #1 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How long has he been on his meds, because when someone starts taking bi polar meds they can go through "cycling" where they are an emotional roller coaster. If the meds are working he should start to level out a bit.
Basically, you need to take care of yourself. If he wants to be around you then he needs to be a respectful. Just because someone is bi polar doesn't mean they get a blank check to treat people like crap. If he acts like a jerk then leave him be. You can't make someone be nice to you or like you, but you can be there at arms length when he needs a friend.
The above poster is correct in the claim that bipolar people are very self centered. It is all about them. My husband was becoming very cruel and extremely depressed. It took it's toll on our marriage. Now, he is not cruel, but he is distant and I guess I could say his emotions are "muted". I guess it is better than him being angry and depressed, but you definitely notice their personality is sort of flat.
2006-07-27 09:55:39 · answer #2 · answered by okidoll821 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
sorry to hear your predicament.
I am bipolar and its hard to hear the other side of it. The only thing I can tell you is that if this is too difficult for you to handle, walk away... being close to someone with mental illness is like being on a rollercoaster that never stops...and it takes a lot of energy and stamina on the friends/families part... If you find you don't have this to give, do yourself and your friend a favor, end the relationship. It will hurt...but it may be for the best for all.
2006-07-27 11:08:37 · answer #3 · answered by running2adream 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your friend sounds like a typical bipolar person who is unmedicated. He's off his meds because he has refused to take responsibility for his bipolar or he may be unable to take responsibility. If the later is true, he needs to be hospitalized. Bipolar is a serious disease and it can reek havoc in relationships. Control of his bipolar is first his responsibility. If he can't or won't control it, it's his doctor's responsibility.
2006-07-27 10:34:33 · answer #4 · answered by jrg001aok 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am bipolar we like to push people away because it is easier sometimes. He may need to talk to someone outside the family/friend thing. This is hard to deal with for him and you. Remember this as hard as it is for you it is twice as hard for him. Bipolar is hardly ever wanted to be disgusted unless the person him/herself brings it up. Everything else is part of being bipolar, he needs to get on meds and talk to someone as i have said before.
2006-07-27 22:17:09 · answer #5 · answered by tasha 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just being around a bipolar person can wear you out.
When we were growing up, I didn't like to be around my sister any more than I had to. After she was diagnosed as bipolar and started taking medicine, I could actually talk with her for longer than 10 minutes.
You can help your friend if you encourage him to take his meds regularly. Tell him that, if he doesn't take them, you won't be able to see him very often, and then keep your word.
If you feel physically afraid, I 'd visit less often. Also, you need to give yourself breaks, just to keep your perspective
2006-07-27 09:45:09 · answer #6 · answered by Nosy Parker 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A person with a bipolar disorder in an uncontrolled manic state can create havoc in all friends and relatives. Get him to start on a medication such a lithium of get out of his life.
2006-07-27 09:51:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's totally normal for the bi-polar person to switch like this (cool one day, hates you the next), but of course for a non-bi-polar person this is totally confusing. You just have to either accept your friend as he is and roll with the punches, or cut your losses and abandon him. It's very hard to have bi-polar people in your life..although sometimes they can make things interesting, it can be a big drain on you, like you said.
2006-07-27 10:00:53 · answer #8 · answered by supernaturaldj2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People who are bipolar can go through major mood swings for no apparent reason and it is impossible to figure it out. If your friend is doing nothing to help himself with his bipolar it makes it really hard for you to be his friend and you need to decide if it is healthy for you.
2006-07-27 09:58:31 · answer #9 · answered by Clyde P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋