How can I teach my cat to fetch me the newspaper, my slippers and my pipe?

Answer 1

well, it will take a lot of work and a lot of time, it has been done before, but I wouldn't count on it working get up and get those things yourself would be the best solution.

Answer 2

HEY!!! MY CAT CAN FETCH STUFF!!! not necessarily a pipe but he can fetch pencils, toys, and some other around the house stuff....if your cat is old (er) it's too late to teach it anything...you gotta get the idea in the kitty head early in life. I however do NOT misuse my kitty talent so everytime he fetches he gets a treat or gets to run around outside like he LOVES to!
Even thought i really hate them, get a dog why don't cha?
or even a better idea.....MOVE YOU BUTT AND DO IT YOURSELF!!!
Back to the cat idea...if you later decide to get a kitten and want to triain it....do what i did....
HOW TO TEACH YOUR CAT TO FETCH PENCILS IN I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY STEPS:
1) Always keep your pencils in the same place
2) Three times daily at around the same time, get your cat like ten steps away from the pencils and hold a treat infront of its nose. with the cat following you , walk slowly to the pecils repetatly saying PENCIL, PENCIL, PENCIL.
3) once you get to the pencils, put one in kitty's mouth... if it falls out it's ok...just keep trying. you could try rubbing the pencil in catnip!
4) walk the kitty back to the starting point using the treat infront of nose thing....if the pencil falls its OK! just get kitty used to the pencil in her mouth.
5) once kitty gets back to where she started from...give her the treat!
6) do this 3x every day. every week, go 5 steps away from the pencils...remember to keep saying PENCIL as you are taining her so she gets the idea in her head. If she eventually succesfully fetches you a pencil....reward her and move on to bigger things like turning on the TV! yes my kitty can do that too but it took FOREVER!!!

Answer 3

Hey, that's easy!When your cat fetched your things, give it a threat!It will think it's fun. Wait for some time, ask your cat to fetch your things for one week, then give it the threat. Then two weeks, three weeks, four weeks, and little by little your cat will fetch your things for you without you giving it any threats.

Answer 4

You should stop smoking. Secondhand smoke can cause lung cancer in cats. For the other tricks call 1-800-get a dog. Dogs have owners, cats have personal assistants.

Answer 5

Go here for an awesome dog training program http://OnlineDogTraining.enle.info/?D1ia

Since it is obvious that you do not have a clue about obedience training, your services should be for free. You cannot train even an adult dog for 8 hours a day. About the most that can be done at any one time is 10 - 20 minutes and that is with an adult dog and not a puppy. The attention span on this baby is extremely short and training session should be no more than 10 minutes and twice a day. Additionally, there isn t going to be much learned if you will only be training for 5 days. Obedience training is cumulative and is done over a much longer period of at least several weeks to several months.
What you can charge is determined by your experience, reputation, and accomplishments and in a case like this, should also include guaranteed expectations. Just working with dogs over several years, is not the experience that is necessary to be a dog trainer. There are too many people who are putting that title to their name and fleecing the public. Don t be one of them.

Answer 6

dogs do that kinda stuff.. not cats. so u have two choices. 1. have a dog 2. keep your goods close to you.

Answer 7

You might like to ask your doctor when you get your next prescription for medication.

Answer 8

Exchange it for a dog!

Answer 9

you can implant into the cats head your brain...i guess they are the same size

Answer 10

You can't.. get a Dog for that... no wait do it your self you lazy sob lol