Whats your favourite top tip ?
Mine has got to be this one.
COMMUTERS. When you leave your house, sprint the first 200 yards and then revert back to your regular walking speed. This will save you from having to do the run of shame for the bus nearer the stop and look like a fool when you miss it.
2006-07-27 00:13:21 · 9 answers · asked by India 55 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
dont invite drug addicts round for a meal on boxing day. They may find the offer of cold turkey embarrassing or offensive.
2006-07-27 03:58:34 · answer #1 · answered by kathy_madwoman_bates 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Avoid paying tax by going to work in a politically unstable Middle
East country inhabited by religious fanatics. Ignore British
Government advice to leave when a war looks imminent, then moan a few weeks later when bombs start going off and there aren't any planes home.
S Goblin, Middlesex
2006-07-27 07:37:09 · answer #2 · answered by Paul D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Smell gas? Simply locate the suspected leak by striking an ordinary match in every room in the house until a loud explosion reveals the source of the escaping gas.
2006-07-27 08:24:16 · answer #3 · answered by dumberthangeorgebush 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not impress you're friends, by pretending that you have the internet. Simply place a plain piece of paper over a photogragh and slowly, but gradually begin to lower it and reveal the image
2006-07-27 09:39:27 · answer #4 · answered by Yokay Booboo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To find out how many of the 9 lives left that your cat has, simply strike it over the head with a brick or paving slab and when it dies, that was obviously its last life, so you can easily tell!
2006-07-27 08:36:37 · answer #5 · answered by ehgringodude007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If someone is choking on a piece of ice simply pour boiling water down their throat and hey presto the obstruction is instantly removed.
2006-07-27 07:19:25 · answer #6 · answered by franja 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aneorexics, when your knees become fatter than your legs, starting eating cakes again.
2006-07-27 08:55:41 · answer #7 · answered by markhatter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DONT call a blonde on the phone when she is ironing her clothes. She will just burn her ear.
2006-07-27 07:31:23 · answer #8 · answered by thesetup85 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never close your glass door or dog slobber will be all over it!!!
2006-07-27 15:04:44 · answer #9 · answered by Boo Boo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋