My ex and I dated for 4 years. I often ask myself why did we date for so long for it just to end and be so painful?
2006-07-26 16:35:54 · 27 answers · asked by lucky*star 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's the experience that matters.
I could ask you, " why does love feel so good?"
Because the two questions go hand in hand.
We have to take the good with the bad, and we have to know when we have grown apart and it is time to move on.
Maybe saying that it is a relationship where you grow and learn is just a way to justify the experience; but without the life experience of feeling love and lose, you would be a much less wise person.
Take the experience, and savior it for what it was.
Take what you learned about yourself and move on with the knowledge of knowing that you are growing to be very wise.
Unfortunately for me, I know this from experience; one too many times.
; - )
2006-07-26 16:44:58 · answer #1 · answered by val schmal 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are not the only one to have a broken heart. Time will heal your heart. You may never get over it completely but life will go on. When you start a relationship you take a chance at it not working out. It's a decision you make to have love in your life, even if it ends bad in the end. But you may chose to look at it like this: If you take the chance to fall in love you could end up with the person you could be with for the rest of your life. Or, not take the chance and be the lonely cat lady.
2006-07-26 16:41:48 · answer #2 · answered by Pig 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You date someone not knowing that you will break up. People usually date to make it last for as long as they can but unfortunately in your case it lasted 4 years and whatever your reasons were, you 2 broke up. You dated not so it would end up being so painful but for you to learn from your experiences and hopefully apply them to the next relationship you have.
2006-07-26 16:43:20 · answer #3 · answered by Jessy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sigh... 4 yrs is a lot of time. I've been there. And it took me 3 years to mend my heart. But you know what? If I have known earlier that the fastest way to recovered from pains is "forgiveness" @ "acceptance" I should have not waisted my 3 years mourning about it "Pains". But since I had forgiven & accepted what happen to my 4 years relationship life gets better and I feel happy that once in my life I was loved and lost...
2006-07-26 16:42:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well after 4 years anything negative that happens will be painful. There are a lot of emotions, feelings and past history at play here. Love hurts because you give part of yourself away to whoever you are with. It will take time to heal, but after 4 years, you've learned important life lessons that you can take on in your next relationship.
2006-07-26 16:40:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The pain that love causes us can be so unfathomable. The reason we have failed relationships is so that when the right one comes around, we know that they are the one. I feel like in my life, I've had to endure a lot of pain when it comes to love. But now that I've moved on and I've recovered from that, I'm thankful. We have to take the rain to appreciate the sun. If we didn't go through all the pain, we wouldn't be able to recognize the unbelievable joy that comes with requited and everlasting love.
2006-07-26 16:40:39 · answer #6 · answered by Arabella 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on what happened in those 4 years; and what was wanted and needed by you, and your ex - I am sorry that it had to end without being resolved - see if you can get a solution worked out: it's a long time to just throw it away!
2006-07-26 16:39:58 · answer #7 · answered by Tash 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes a relationship will do this. It's not unusual at all, but definetely painful. Hopefully you have learned some good out of it and can use it to move on into something better or as good as you had. Only take the good from it and it will make you a stronger person.
2006-07-26 16:40:45 · answer #8 · answered by ddy'sgrl77 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate this quote but here goes, "All is fair in love and war." It was supposed to happen, so that you can learn what you do want and what you don't want, therefore when you do come across the right relationship for you, you will then have a better appreciation for it rather than taking it for granted like a lot of people might.
2006-07-26 16:39:30 · answer #9 · answered by Aussie Chick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because the chemicals in your brain that love uses act just like the ones for heroin or alcohol. It becomes an addiction, and you have to take time to get used to living without it, or you just get another 'fix' from someone else for a while.
It hurts because it is so powerful and influences the actual structure of your mind.
Avoid sugar in your diet for a while. Eat plenty of protein and think about doing things for yourself first.
2006-07-26 16:40:11 · answer #10 · answered by auntiegrav 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋