Should I stay with my mildly violent boyfriend?

Question

One day it's a chair, the next day it's my nose. Every day my boyfriend breaks something in the house or hits me with something, but, I still love him dearly. I don' mind his violent tendencies, but am I safe? Please help.

I've already moved four times, but he loves me so much he keeps finding me because he says he doesn't trust the world and doesn't feel that I could be safe without his presence.

I'm sorry, I was just lying on here, my boyfriend is not violent at all, he is great and he loves me.

Sorry for wasting everyones time.

I'm not lying, my bf just saw my message and told me to write that. He's in the bathroom throwing stuff around...

It's going to be a bad night...

Answer 1

uhm- NO.

don't be a weak girl, get the hell away from the jerkoff.

Answer 2

You're not at all safe and you're only kidding yourself if you think he can change. You are better than this and you don't deserve to be treated in such a fashion. If you live together, pack your bags and leave. Call Women in Distress in your area...they will help you get a plan together so you can leave safely without the threat of him hurting you again. You might love him dearly, but he doesn't really love you if he's causing you physical and mental anguish. Get out now...it's easier to start over than to wind up dead. I hope to God that you listen to us hear and run for the hills. It will be hard at first, but I promise it will be so much better. I've been there. Good luck!

Answer 3

i have been in the same situation.i have been with my bf for almost 3 years.it was bad at first not everyday but bad.we have a baby together and i have one from before.for a while he would get jelouse of my other one.he has really mellowed down now.it took him about a year and a half but now we act more like a family.the last time he did anytihng was about 3 mo ago and before that it had been about 4 mo with nothing.he has really gotten better .he has calmed down a lt too.its hard with kids.but i think we are a lot better now.i would tell him he needs to calm down.way down.but i know what you mean i love my bf too i could never leave him.but the one thing that helped me is when hes mad is to leave him alone and walk away.i used to chase after him when he was mad and that made it worse.so if hes mad get out of the situation.it really hepled us.i hope i helped you in some way.thanks
britney

Answer 4

I don't think that you are safe and i would say neither do you. If you thought you were safe you would not be asking a question like that. You should let him know that he temper is becoming unbearable and that you cannot see him anymore unless he controls his attitude towards you. If it happens even more more day past telling him that then you need to move on. It is bad enough that he has been hitting you all along. But if you give him notice and he still continues then i say F U C K him

Answer 5

HELL NO!!!!!
You are not safe!
I am always amazed that any woman will put-up with a
violent personality for more than one episode. Do you have no
regard for yourself?? What if you have kids, do you actually
believe that he will not hurt them also??
Please do not delude yourself here, he will also hurt children
if they are around. Get the hell out before it is too late for you.
If you stay, then you are telling him that his violence is O.K. and
then he will escalate it somewhere along the line. I have had
much experience with this sort of person when my mother was
single and had a few violent boyfriends. She always made
excuses for his abhorrent behavior. I call "men" like this
sub-humanoid life forms.

Good luck.
And make the right decision.

Oh, and DO NOT listen to Britney Marco ( see above) if
her man actually changed his violent tendencies, he is one
in ten million.

Answer 6

Your boyfriend is a bully and sees you as a very easy target. By staying with him - you are basically condoning his behaviour, and telling him that the way he treats you is okay - which it isn't!
You said " I don't mind his violent tendencies". Are you serious!? How can you not mind that your man, who is supposed to love and cherish you, is using you as a punching bag.
No you are not safe. By having so far condoned his actions, each day he could get worse. Eventually you could end up in hospital - or dead. Imagine if you get pregnant. If you could even bring this child to term (without him having harmed you and your child during pregnancy), could you really bring up a child in this environment? How do you see your future with this man?
I think he needs to seek professional help, find out the source of his anger, and why he thinks it is okay to take it out on you. It's not, and you are putting your life in danger every day by putting up with it. Do yourself a favour and get out now.
Have you seen the movie 'Enough'? Well ENOUGH IS ENOUGH - get out, save yourself. You come first and your well being should come over your 'love' for this barbarian...
Don't be blind to what is going on around you. The fact that you even need to ask this really scares me. You know that its not okay, you are just looking for reassurance from us. Well here it is!!

Answer 7

When you say mildly, what do you mean? Honestly...a violent bf that is "mild" or more is not someone you should be with. Violence is never good regardless of severity. Also, hitting your nose is more than mild. You are not safe..that is why you are asking Yahoo! Answers. Trust your instincts....it is not safe to hang around a guy who hits his gf.

Just think about what he could do next...maybe he will break your arm or leg..and that is criminal. I suggest you go to a women's shelter ASAP. Often times, they have counselors who you can talk about domestic abuse. They will be able to show you how to deal with him..and perhaps even get a restraining order if the threatens you. Good luck!

Answer 8

Yes, stay with him. You should definitely wait until he jams a knife through your ribcage, and dumps your body in a lake. I think that sounds like a swell idea.

You know what? You are teaching this moron that it is ok to treat women that way. You teach him this by staying with him. So once you finally get fed up with it and leave ( or he kills you), he's going to treat the next girl even worse because, well, he got away with it for so long with you.

do something for your fellow females. Leave him and don't look back. Let him know it's not acceptable behavior.

Answer 9

Speaking from personal experience, you're not safe. He has a lot of problems if he's hitting you. You don't deserve this. You may want to seek help, whether it be counseling or a local domestic violence agency. Either way you shouldn't be with a boyfriend that hurts you. You can check out sites like www.rainn.org for more information. Best of luck dear. If you need someone to talk to, I'm always here.

Answer 10

Okay, hun. You need to get away from him...and NOW! Even if you love him, it's not gonna be enough to stop him from hurting you. Contact the police to get him because he IS abusive...there's no such thing as mildly violent. Get a restraining order and move to a different state if you have to, but DO get away from him ASAP. You deserve someone who can care for you and protect you, not someone who hits you whenever he gets pissed. Get outta there hun, and make it fast.

Answer 11

WOW! seriously no offense but come on now dont be stupid if ya asking if ur safe then what the heck r ya still doin in that kind of relationship? I was in a relationship like that except he was bipolar n had ADHD but, he would start hitting me jokingly till it got serious like one time in a movie theatre, I didnt talk to him the whole movie or after. I left him like there was no tomorrow. hun ur not safe no matter how much ya say ya love him or he loves u. Just imagine 10 years from now if he hasnt changed or thats if ur even still alive? STOP n get out now while ya can b4 it gets worse! save ur confidence n pride hun b4 it gets ruined over some guy thats not worht it!