my son is 6, his dad lives in oregon. this is the first summer he has taken him. he picked him up a week after school got out and said he would bring him home the middle of aug. school starts aug 28th. i still need to take my son for a physical and school clothes shopping BEFORE school starts. his father says he cant afford to bring him back untill sept 1st. to me that is unexceptable! he took him and he knew it was his responsiblity to bring him home in time. my car is running like **** and i cant just go get him.( im in notheren california).. nor should i have to! this looser dont even pay child support ... yes there is a child support order... he just got a job like 2 weeks ago. he says - i wanted to buy him some school clothes( would be a shocker) and get him a hair cut before i bringhim home. i told him thats nice and all but im not worried about that.... im worried about him comming home... i will take care of all that as usual! what can i do besides call the police...
2006-07-26 11:26:35 · 16 answers · asked by pinksgirlfriend 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
i am not a cop caller and i think this sucks!
2006-07-26 11:27:03 · update #1
we have a old cort order saying he gets everyother weekend and 4 weeks of the summer,,, we never went back to court when he moved to oregon a year ago...
2006-07-26 11:33:16 · update #2
It sounds to me that there is a lot of love there for the boy from both his parents. Be happy about that. My sons have been totally ignored by there father and they are sad sometimes because of it. I do know how frustrated you're feeling, schools here, things to get ready for that, but please be glad that your son has a daddy that loves him. School is very important, but circumstances has come up that has made it hard to get him back sooner, and maybe he also feels guilty for not being there more for the boy, and he's trying to make up for that by buying him clothes and getting a haircut. It seems to me your ex has changed, but it sounds like for the better, give him a chance and a break, even if you don't think he deserves it. Its just a few extra days, and you said he just started working, maybe after this , with more understanding from you, he'll be able to prove what a good dad he's trying to be.
2006-07-26 12:09:47 · answer #1 · answered by junkmail 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It does not sound like there is much you can do but let him bring him home on Sept. first. If you do not call the cops.
If you did call the cops that would probaly really freak out your son. If he does bring him home on September first, the worst thing that can happen is your son will miss the first two days of school.
Is your son enjoing himself? I have a similar personal experience as the child and I can tell you that even though the dad is flakey, your son is fortunate to have a dad that wants to spend time with him.
Even though you would feel walked on if you went to pick up your son, maybe it would make you feel better. How about a bus or train if your car will not make it? Or rental car? It might be a nice road trip (vacation) for you and your son on the way home.
I can understand as a Mom how hard it would be to not see your child for the whole Summer, I think I would worry every day! I hope everything works out.
2006-07-26 12:39:15 · answer #2 · answered by KEOE 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you can do is not be a total b*tch in this situation. It's understandable why you're angry, but your talking about your kids father and whether or not you like him now, you owe it to your kid to have his father in his life and you owe it to his dad to let him see his son.
You're kind of blowing it out of proportion, though. A kid doesn't need new clothes before the school year starts, do it when its convenient after he's back. However, if school starts on August 28th, and you really think your kid should be there, I think it would be appropriate to maybe take a bus to pick him up or have your husband take a bus down with him.
If it cant work out, your kid misses what, a couple days of 1st grade? Not a big deal. When I was a kid we'd come back from vacations and I'd miss the first couple of days sometimes. I didn't miss out on anything. I think you really don't like the idea of not having control over your child. Be responsible, don't be a b*tch and rat your husband out on the cops. Talk to him, see if he can bring your kid any earlier.
I don't know him or you, but if there's a genuine reason for concern that he's not EVER going to give your kid back, then that's a whole different situation and maybe legal help will be needed if the kids not back by the first like his dad said.
2006-07-26 11:38:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tough call, especially since I'm a single father with kids. It is true, that he will be late, and that is not cool, but he also gets his kid so little time. Moving away was also a bad call on his behalf, but I would cut the guy a little slack. Unless you kid is starting high school or something, they won't be missing too much. I'm sure he is trying his best.
The courts are giving fathers more legal rights than they used to, you might even loose if you do not have a good lawyer. If the father can get your kid back, I'm sure he will figure out a way. I don't know your ex, I'm just assuming will try to do the right thing.
2006-07-26 11:47:14 · answer #4 · answered by fortuitousoppty 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're talking about a kid starting first grade. He's not going to miss much. Besides, school will always be there, but will his dad? In this day and age, one doesn't know from moment to moment what will happen. Wouldn't you feel guilty if you said nasty things to your ex, called the cops on him, made him into a criminal in front of his child and a few days later something dreadful happened to him? You might not care, but as young as your child is, he will never forgive you. You have a choice, you can be hard-nosed about it, make life unpleasant for everyone as well as waste taxpayers' money on unnecessary legal action, or you can be mellow and in the process teach the boy something about understanding and compromise.
2006-07-26 14:19:56 · answer #5 · answered by pepper 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If this isn't important enough a matter for you to call the police or rent a car to go get your son, then why are you asking total strangers how to handle it?? It's easily handled if you're willing to do what needs to be done, if not then quit pretending you're so concerned about your son making it to school because you obviously aren't concerned or you'd be on the phone with the cops or a car rental place right now instead of sitting at your computer reading this.
2006-07-26 11:50:13 · answer #6 · answered by Jennifer F 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, as a divorce father of 2, I can see if from his view. He wants to see his son for a few more weeks. Will missing a week a school really do your son that much harm? But will being with his dad do him that much more good? So let the man enjoy his time with his son without the stress of you bitchin at him.
2006-07-26 11:34:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry you're going through all this. If you are the custodial parent, then the father needs to bring the child home to get ready for school. If not, you're gonna have to go to court and make the father give your son to you. If all else fails, go get your baby and have the cops with you!
2006-07-26 11:33:49 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think calling the police would be the safest way to handle this. You don't want your child to be exposed to the fighting. Putting this on record by calling the police would be very good in future custody and child support battles, because it seems to me that he's pretty much a loser and probably continue not paying support.
2006-07-26 11:32:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
tel your ex that if he won't bring the boy home in time for you to take the boy shopping for school clothes than he has to do it then send him a list of what the child needs once he gets this either the child will be back early of dad will have a big shopping chore to do
2006-07-26 11:32:21 · answer #10 · answered by Elaine F 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋