Can someone tell me a dirty joke?

Question

The dirtier teh better +)

Answer 1

~MY FIRST EXPERIENCE

The sky was dark, the moon was high
We were alone just her and I.
Her hair was brown, her eyes were blue
I just knew what she wanted to do.
So, with some courage I did my best
and placed my head upon her breast.
Her face was good, her body was fine
I ran my hand down her spine.
She trembled and shook, I felt her heart
She spread her legs...slowly apart!
I knew she was ready, but I didn't know how
Because this was my first experience milking a cow!!!

Answer 2

A little old lady went into the Bank of America one day carrying a bag of money. She insists that she must speak with the President of the bank to open a savings account because it's a lot of money.

They finally get her into the presidents office and he asks her how much she would like to deposit. She says she has $165,000 and then dumps it out of the bag onto his desk. The president was surprised and of course curious as to how she came by all this cash, so he asks her. The old lady says, "I make bets."

The president replies, "Bets? What kind of bets?" and she says, "For example, I'll bet you $25,000 that your balls are square."

"Ha!" says the president, "That's a stupid bet, you can never win that kind of bet."

The old lady says, "So, would you like to take my bet?"

"Sure," says the president, "I'll bet $25,000 that my balls are not square!"

The little old lady says, "OK, but since there is a lot of money involved is it OK with you if I bring my lawyer with me tomorrow at 10:00 AM to witness?"

"Sure," says the president.

That night the president got very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of a mirror checking his balls, turning from side to side, again and again, thoroughly checking them out until he was sure that there is no way his balls are square and that he will win the bet.

The next morning at 10 AM the little old lady appears with her lawyer at the president's office. She introduces the lawyer to the president and repeats the bet, that $25,000 says the president's balls are square. The president agrees with the bet again and the old lady asks him to drop his pants so they can see. The president does this.

The little old lady looks closely at his balls and then asks if she can feel them.

"Well, OK" says the president, $25,000 is a lot of money, so I guess you should be absolutely sure."

Then he notices that the lawyer is quietly banging his head against the wall and he asks the old lady, "What is wrong with your lawyer?"

She replies, "Nothing, except I bet him $100,000 that by 10 AM today I'd have The Bank of America's president's balls in my hands!"

Answer 3

Sorry to mention how a character appears (clothes, type in their hair, facial features) or although one appears too of some thing (I bet to your case, their stereotype of a kkk nazi man) can initiate detailed reactions from men and women. I say, you cannot do something to difference their notion until you're pleasant to them, pleasant and honest..you do not need to be a pushover to be a pleasant man. I labored in a specified workplace (minimize rung of the company international) and there have been only a few non-white men in our workplace..One seem at this one dude made me suppose of a kkk nazi (wore metal toe boots, had shaved head, white T-blouse and blue denims) however he was once a pleasant man besides while he was once sarcastic. Unfortunately, he gave off the affect that he was once higher than any one and had a chip on his shoulder for finishing up running in our minimize-paying workplace, however all in all, he was once a fab man regardless of his the "seem" he projected and oftentimes "pissy" angle. Maybe its the angle you could have on most sensible of your appears that explanations them to suppose detailed approaches approximately you? In my sincere opinion, men and women in Northern Cali (SF Bay Area) are extra accepting of peoples of all backgrounds than in SoCal. I lived in San Jose additionally and there was once most effective white male in my complete elegance (financially deficient) who bore the brunt of hatred from Latinos and Blacks/Afr-Amer in my institution--i assume their manner of venting out beyond racist studies that they had. It's no longer correct, but it surely occurs...

Answer 4

a white hores fell in the mud

want a dirdier joke?
2 white horses fell in the mud

want to here a clean joke?
a muddy horse fell in a bath

(bet ya werent expecting that were ya?)

Answer 5

Why did the condom fly across the room?
It was pissed off.

What is better than roses on your piano?
Tulips on your organ.

Answer 6

What's yellow and green and eats nuts? Gohnerea

Answer 7

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get coc*.


Weak, but unusual.

Answer 8

The Pig fell into the mud......

Answer 9

yea! Hillary is president.